Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 04-13-2018
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 4
Thanked 1 Time
SkepticMind SkepticMind is offline
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 4
Thanked 1 Time
While I have a few ambitious pursuits that I hold with a great degree of importance, I always feel obstructed and frustrated when I think about my age. And I'm stuck with the notion that "I'm too old for that". As I try to make every day count and pave my way closer to achieving my goals, it's always these intrusive thoughts that's holding me back.

I don't want to mention my age here because I want to stay away from the idea that age is a big deal and that I have limitations or deadlines. Unfortunately, the media likes to imbue certain ages with their standard of youth and vitality. I always try to convince myself that age is just a number, which in reality, is true. I mean if you look around, you see 40 year olds who look and act young, and you see 20 year olds you look and act old. Age is not a measure of youth, it's your personality and character that determines that.

My personal trainer is 40 years old and she does running marathons and she runs up to 10k. One of my favourite singers hit 32 recently and she maintains her fitness and goes clubbing every weekend. One of my favourite acrobatic athletes hit 33 and still does performances. My favourite role model is 55 years old and he goes around debating people, he's trenchant and intellectual. Nobody asks these people how old they are and that they shouldn't be doing what they're doing at that age...

I know I'm being irrational about this whole age thing. I have goals that are not too demanding, and I'm so close to achieving them, if I could only put in a little effort in focusing on them rather than wallowing over my age.

Sadly, I go through this on a daily basis, and I have a tough time finding any sort of inspiration. and I was wondering, may be it isn't my irrational thoughts over my age, may be I'm going through clinical depression? I realised that throughout the day I get episodes of depression and perhaps anti-depressants just might be the solution to this problem? Or perhaps all I need is a push from some encouraging words...
SkepticMind is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-13-2018
Banned
Elite User
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,661
Thanked 395 Times
theslowesthand theslowesthand is offline
Banned
Elite User
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,661
Thanked 395 Times
Anti-depressants can help prevent & rid clinical depression (which is when you lose all "emotional connection" to things). But the cause of the depression i think is the automatic negative thoughts (ANTs). "ANTs are cynical, gloomy, and complaining thoughts that just seem to keep marching in all by themselves" (from the book "Change Your Brain, Change Your Life").
theslowesthand is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-14-2018
Kiwong's Avatar
Elite User
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: falling for life wave after wave and never saying goodbye
Posts: 7,722
Thanked 442 Times
Kiwong Kiwong is offline
Elite User
Kiwong's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: falling for life wave after wave and never saying goodbye
Posts: 7,722
Thanked 442 Times
Age. A visit a nursing home and see what a struggle it is for the elderly.

I have my physical heatlh, independence, wealth, hobbies I love. I can run.

There is no doubt I will look back with longing. I had all that why did I worry.
__________________
In my dreams nothing holds me down, there is only out and away. I wish I could die and be reborn as a bird. William Wharton Birdy
Kiwong is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-14-2018
PugofCrydee's Avatar
Where we're going, we won't need eyes to see.
Elite User
 
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Behind you
Posts: 2,923
Thanked 440 Times
PugofCrydee PugofCrydee is offline
Where we're going, we won't need eyes to see.
Elite User
PugofCrydee's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Behind you
Posts: 2,923
Thanked 440 Times
You cant.

*Looks at depression in the mirror*

me: 'Hi, who are you?'
depression: "I'm you, only stronger'.
PugofCrydee is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-14-2018
FountainandFairfax's Avatar
I remember a time of chaos... ruined dreams... this wasted land.
Elite User
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 3,804
Thanked 572 Times
FountainandFairfax FountainandFairfax is offline
I remember a time of chaos... ruined dreams... this wasted land.
Elite User
FountainandFairfax's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 3,804
Thanked 572 Times
You wouldn't give up on your dreams if you'd just awoken from a ten or twenty year coma, so don't give up on them now.
__________________
Last of The V8 Introverts
FountainandFairfax is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-15-2018
grapevine's Avatar
Elite User
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,106
Thanked 148 Times
grapevine grapevine is offline
Elite User
grapevine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,106
Thanked 148 Times
Age can be no barrier , it's more health and mindset I've found. But with me as a woman I do get depressed being 35 and time ticking by in terms of fertility.
__________________
KAZAM

~Truely be your best friend- try to see yourself with unconditional compassion '
grapevine is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-16-2018
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 2
Thanked 1 Time
saxyman99 saxyman99 is offline
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 2
Thanked 1 Time
I remember feeling this way. I reached 30 and hadn't come close to my goals when I was 18. My peers had already graduated college and started families and I had none of that. I didn't move past this until I recognized some very real facts. Here is what you must realize and you will not move past this until you accomplish these things in order (I'm not kidding): First, you must love yourself. That means you must forgive yourself for your mistakes (both intentional and unintentional). Second, you must decide if you want to live in freedom or wallow in self pity. If you can love yourself and decide you want to live in freedom, then you can move this third phase: the people you are referencing have lived a completely different life than you and you logically cannot have the same expectations of yourself when you're life until now (past and present) is different than theirs. They didn't grow up in the house you grew up in. They didn't have the same experiences you had as a child, teen, 20 something, etc. The path you have left behind is a path you, and only you, have had to walk. Had those people lived your life, they might have ended up where you are and vice versa. You cannot judge your path using someone else's path as a reference. You must life your own life and focus on overcoming the obstacles in your path.

Last edited by saxyman99; 04-16-2018 at 04:24 AM. Reason: to expand my answer.
saxyman99 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to saxyman99 For This Useful Post:
grapevine (04-18-2018)
Old 04-16-2018
Cloud910's Avatar
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4
Thanked 1 Time
Cloud910 Cloud910 is offline
Newbie User
Cloud910's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4
Thanked 1 Time
I try not to think about it, because when i do I go into anxiety and depression and want to get out and keep running.
What you can do is try to accept it, and not think about it no matter how hard it is.
It is something you can't control and a number of how many years you've been living on planet Earth.
Find some purpose to live, everyone has, you have, eat healthy, excercise, go out there beyond your comfort zones and seek enjoyment. When I went skydiving, my instructor was 70. He might be dreading his age, but he is living it to the full. You can too.
Cloud910 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-17-2018
BlueDays's Avatar
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Elite User
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: In my secret hiding place.
Posts: 9,950
Thanked 414 Times
BlueDays BlueDays is offline
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Elite User
BlueDays's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: In my secret hiding place.
Posts: 9,950
Thanked 414 Times
Quote:
Originally Posted by saxyman99 View Post
.. the people you are referencing have lived a completely different life than you and you logically cannot have the same expectations of yourself when you're life until now (past and present) is different than theirs. They didn't grow up in the house you grew up in. They didn't have the same experiences you had as a child, teen, 20 something, etc. The path you have left behind is a path you, and only you, have had to walk. Had those people lived your life, they might have ended up where you are and vice versa. You cannot judge your path using someone else's path as a reference. You must life your own life and focus on overcoming the obstacles in your path.
So VERY TRUE!
BlueDays is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-18-2018
grapevine's Avatar
Elite User
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,106
Thanked 148 Times
grapevine grapevine is offline
Elite User
grapevine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,106
Thanked 148 Times
Quote:
Originally Posted by saxyman99 View Post
I remember feeling this way. I reached 30 and hadn't come close to my goals when I was 18. My peers had already graduated college and started families and I had none of that. I didn't move past this until I recognized some very real facts. Here is what you must realize and you will not move past this until you accomplish these things in order (I'm not kidding): First, you must love yourself. That means you must forgive yourself for your mistakes (both intentional and unintentional). Second, you must decide if you want to live in freedom or wallow in self pity. If you can love yourself and decide you want to live in freedom, then you can move this third phase: the people you are referencing have lived a completely different life than you and you logically cannot have the same expectations of yourself when you're life until now (past and present) is different than theirs. They didn't grow up in the house you grew up in. They didn't have the same experiences you had as a child, teen, 20 something, etc. The path you have left behind is a path you, and only you, have had to walk. Had those people lived your life, they might have ended up where you are and vice versa. You cannot judge your path using someone else's path as a reference. You must life your own life and focus on overcoming the obstacles in your path.
This is so true -
__________________
KAZAM

~Truely be your best friend- try to see yourself with unconditional compassion '
grapevine is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-19-2018
josebell's Avatar
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: New York
Posts: 1
Thanked 0 Times
josebell josebell is offline
Newbie User
josebell's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: New York
Posts: 1
Thanked 0 Times
just make friends of all age group, be in friendship relationship with young girls and boys, same with old age group and middle age group. enjoy the moment and company being with all age bar it will change the mindset, thinking and also upgrade our mental thinking up to date. friendship will always keep you evergreen.
josebell is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 04-19-2018
Kenopsia's Avatar
Newbie User
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4
Thanked 2 Times
Kenopsia Kenopsia is offline
Newbie User
Kenopsia's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4
Thanked 2 Times
have you ever tried volunteer? these organizations have often a wide range age and none judge the age
Kenopsia is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Kenopsia For This Useful Post:
MollyBeGood (04-20-2018)
Old 06-04-2018
lily's Avatar
Elite User
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 1,380
Thanked 187 Times
lily lily is offline
Elite User
lily's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 1,380
Thanked 187 Times
age. i hate that society puts an oldness to age. it's not true! if you take care of yourself well you not only will feel young but look young! it also can be a genetic thing as well but anyway i know a 40 years old who looks and act like she's twenty something! i know a 50 year old who looks like she could be 26! i look younger than my ago too. i can look as young as 16! i have a pic of me in the post your picture thread but I'm afraid to post a larger pic for security reasons. who cares about your age, just take care of yourself and be who you feel you are on the inside and out!
lily is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Reply
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Depression, Trauma, Anxiety and Anger (Past) Cetnien Anxiety Forum 4 04-14-2016 05:15 AM
Have you let go of the past? DanielLewis Social Anxiety Forum 4 10-14-2015 03:17 AM
Do you think you can relive the past? tiscircle Social Anxiety Forum 12 11-10-2010 09:01 AM
The past.. regrets etc.. how do you get past them? DownInAHole Social Anxiety Forum 6 10-26-2009 09:59 AM
obsessional past kittykat90 OCD Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Forum 7 07-29-2008 01:26 PM

All times are GMT. The time now is 08:16 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.10
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
 
Contact Us Privacy