Does anyone doubt that thier SP might be connected to lazyness

[FallenFeathers]

Like being too lazy to go out and see people:kickingmyself:, I agree that some people would say that they feel lazy because its too hard to face people and it takes a lot of effort to face people?:alone::thumbdown:

I think the question could be clarified a bit better to be honest,But what sort of connection do you think there might be? Are you trying to say being lazy can prolong social anxiety and keeps the cycle of avoidance going?

I think people with any disorder or mental health problem often go through a period of having a mindset where.. (I don't exclude myself from this either) we say we want to get better more than anything as they are deeply unhappy with their life, yet we genuinely expect things to change despite the fact we don't try and change our behavior or confront our problems.

It's almost like we expect the solution to come to us, or were quite happy to bury our heads in the sand and just wait for some miracle cure. We sometimes even push away help and dismiss things that we have not even tried yet stating they will not work when we haven't even given them a chance (Future predicting, sadly another trait of having a disorder like anxiety and depression, something a lot of us don't even realize we do).

I guess that could look lazy to some people, or perhaps stubborn and seems like the person is actually reluctant to change. But for a start it's a well known fact things like depression affect your thinking for a start, if we were simply able to snap out of the self defeatist thinking or simply "pull ourselves together" then we would not have depression in the first place.

And I think a similar thing applies to things like social anxiety... if people could simply pull themselves together and force themselves to tackle and beat our problems, then I think a lot of us would already be cured. Sadly it's more complicated than that, even with the really good enthusiasm and effort, and the support of things like c.b.t therapies... social anxiety is still a hard thing to beat or even control. I really don't think being lazy has anything to do with it.. and while like a lot of things, you are not going to see results if you don't put any effort in, too many people confuse lack of motivation and willpower for laziness when that's really not fair.

 

[CursedSoul]

I think the question could be clarified a bit better to be honest,But what sort of connection do you think there might be? Are you trying to say being lazy can prolong social anxiety and keeps the cycle of avoidance going?

I think people with any disorder or mental health problem often go through a period of having a mindset where.. (I don't exclude myself from this either) we say we want to get better more than anything as they are deeply unhappy with their life, yet we genuinely expect things to change despite the fact we don't try and change our behavior or confront our problems.

It's almost like we expect the solution to come to us, or were quite happy to bury our heads in the sand and just wait for some miracle cure. We sometimes even push away help and dismiss things that we have not even tried yet stating they will not work when we haven't even given them a chance (Future predicting, sadly another trait of having a disorder like anxiety and depression, something a lot of us don't even realize we do).

I guess that could look lazy to some people, or perhaps stubborn and seems like the person is actually reluctant to change. But for a start it's a well known fact things like depression affect your thinking for a start, if we were simply able to snap out of the self defeatist thinking or simply "pull ourselves together" then we would not have depression in the first place.

And I think a similar thing applies to things like social anxiety... if people could simply pull themselves together and force themselves to tackle and beat our problems, then I think a lot of us would already be cured. Sadly it's more complicated than that, even with the really good enthusiasm and effort, and the support of things like c.b.t therapies... social anxiety is still a hard thing to beat or even control. I really don't think being lazy has anything to do with it.. and while like a lot of things, you are not going to see results if you don't put any effort in, too many people confuse lack of motivation and willpower for laziness when that's really not fair.

i understand what you mean but next time use smaller sentences please:kickingmyself:

 

[CursedSoul]

^I have Adhd so thats why I find it hard to concentrate on big texts:applause::kickingmyself::thumbdown:

 

[FallenFeathers]

i understand what you mean but next time use smaller sentences please:kickingmyself:

Sadly some things can't be summed up with a tl;dr all the time. Though if I ever just reply to just you personally I will try and keep things shorter if I can.

 

[CursedSoul]

Sadly some things can't be summed up with a tl;dr all the time. Though if I ever just reply to just you personally I will try and keep things shorter if I can.

Actually two previous messages have been removed by either the moderator or hellhound himself, my adhd message was for hellhound who mentioned of your message...

 

[ShadowCookie]

I think lazy people would not feel guilt and shame for avoiding. SAers are consumed by it.

Precisely. Look, I'm quite lazy at times, and there are days where I just want to lay in bed and do nothing at all. There isn't a day that goes by that I feel like I am wasting my life away, doing nothing exciting or experiencing the things that I want to, but lack the confidence to do so. During my teen years I was definitely consumed with guilt over my nonexistent life - no job, friends, no money, stuck indoors most days on the computer. I feel like I've come along way since then, and I do make an effort nowadays to talk to people, something I would never have done before.

So, is social phobia linked to laziness? Maybe at times, as another poster mentioned, people who shy away from social situations eventually become quite lazy due to their sedentary lifestyle, but everyone with social phobia wants to do something, make friends, socialise, and as for myself, I really want to travel.

 

[Earthcircle]

Anxiety is the usual explanation. Aren't there workaholic people with SA?

 

[OceanMist]

Anxiety is the usual explanation. Aren't there workaholic people with SA?

That's def a touche. Valid point.

 

[BlackPuma]

^I have Adhd so thats why I find it hard to concentrate on big texts:applause::kickingmyself::thumbdown:

If you got trouble staying focussed, you may want to give this a try.

Download Free NaturalReader---Free online text to speech software with naturally sounding voices online

I'm far sighted myself, and can't look at a bright screen with my glasses since it highlights smudges to a blinding degree. That in turn gives me headaches. So I can't focus on the text on the screen very well most of the time, making long pieces of text a chore to read without leaning in/it being read to me as I read.

If grammar and spelling is correct, I just copy and paste it into this program and read along with the blurry black lines I can see. It's rather useful. The demo they have is free and unlimited I believe.

 

[theslowesthand]

...too many people confuse lack of motivation and willpower for laziness when that's really not fair

But aren't they essentially the same thing?? Or is laziness more of a situational thing? Or a temporary thing, like tiredness?

 

[theslowesthand]

So, is social phobia linked to laziness? Maybe at times, as another poster mentioned, people who shy away from social situations eventually become quite lazy due to their sedentary lifestyle, but everyone with social phobia wants to do something, make friends, socialise, and as for myself, I really want to travel

Not to my knowledge!. Perhaps my long-term avoidance of everything people, has resulted in a kind of general "laziness" in life (ie habitually avoiding "doing" things, out of fear), such that i've actually "shut-down" most of my desires, such as to "experience life". But i can't recall ever having those desires really, certainly not to meet people. Maybe my fear/anxieties shut them down very early on in life???.

 

[FallenFeathers]

But aren't they essentially the same thing?? Or is laziness more of a situational thing? Or a temporary thing, like tiredness?

Hmm I personally wouldn't say so. Though I guess I should of clarified a bit more because you do make a good point.

When I say lack of motivation, I mean in the mental health sense of depression affecting you, people find even the simplest of things so hard to do or see them as too overwhelming to attempt.

And anxiety can just cause the lack of willpower, because you might know you need to do something, but the fear of that situation makes it very hard to force yourself to.

Where laziness to me at least describes a situation where someone says "I'm not going to do that because I can't be bothered or it's not worth the effort" Being lazy is more of a choice in how you expend your energy.. where avoiding stuff due to anxiety or depression is down to an error in thinking that we don't have control over.

There is an attitude among some people and sadly even some doctors, that well a person with anxiety or depression has two legs and two arms, there is nothing physically stopping them from doing some things. In a technical sense I guess that's right... but I think it's really old fashioned and highly ignorant to the fact that mental health problems are an illness, not a lifestyle choice.

 

[EscapeArtist]

to be honest I don't believe in laziness... Procrastination is a form of perfectionism. You delay the actions you must take because you're afraid you won't be good enough at them. Or you have a problem with motivation and energy levels. Idk the word Laziness never made sense without a bigger reason looming in the background

 

[BlueDays]

to be honest I don't believe in laziness... Procrastination is a form of perfectionism. You delay the actions you must take because you're afraid you won't be good enough at them. Or you have a problem with motivation and energy levels. Idk the word Laziness never made sense without a bigger reason looming in the background

^I totally agree with this Escape.
There is always an underlying reason why someone does not wish to do something.
People who call other people "lazy" seem to use it as a blanket description so they don't have to address the real problem imo.

 

[hidwell]

^I totally agree with this Escape.
There is always an underlying reason why someone does not wish to do something.
People who call other people "lazy" seem to use it as a blanket description so they don't have to address the real problem imo.

Well that makes three of us. :thumbup:

 

[mikebird]

Does anyone doubt that their SP might be connected to laziness

I remember some lazy students living in accommodation with active students - some lived on sofas or floor, in sleeping bags, never leaving the building. Maybe a laziness attribute that carried over from school - the dropout type. I was lucky enough to find accommodation after the first year in halls... equivalent to apartments, as I am now! I had a magic 1st year, but just managed to get into a house with 4 of us - 2 girls upstairs. I got the biggest main room downstairs because a girl left. One mate from the course got the back room. These conditions were new to me. These would have been the reception room and the dining room. No chairs or sofa in either. Rough. Just a mattress. All others I knew had this planned well ahead for the next year - so no places left for me. It was pure luck for me. Never lazy or stupid

I've had enough energy to be on time for everything in my life. If I don't like smalltalk or any peripheral contact with people, I ignore them.

But my status today might seem as lazy, achieving nothing, but my determination never dwindles. There is outright barriers to my employment, no matter how many times I attempt.

A caged tiger who can't get through the fence wouldn't be able to feed on anything unless the meat gets thrown in, whether the tiger roars or begs, or doesn't.

 

[CursedSoul]

Re: Does anyone doubt that their SP might be connected to laziness

I remember some lazy students living in accommodation with active students - some lived on sofas or floor, in sleeping bags, never leaving the building. Maybe a laziness attribute that carried over from school - the dropout type. I was lucky enough to find accommodation after the first year in halls... equivalent to apartments, as I am now! I had a magic 1st year, but just managed to get into a house with 4 of us - 2 girls upstairs. I got the biggest main room downstairs because a girl left. One mate from the course got the back room. These conditions were new to me. These would have been the reception room and the dining room. No chairs or sofa in either. Rough. Just a mattress. All others I knew had this planned well ahead for the next year - so no places left for me. It was pure luck for me. Never lazy or stupid

I've had enough energy to be on time for everything in my life. If I don't like smalltalk or any peripheral contact with people, I ignore them.

But my status today might seem as lazy, achieving nothing, but my determination never dwindles. There is outright barriers to my employment, no matter how many times I attempt.

A caged tiger who can't get through the fence wouldn't be able to feed on anything unless the meat gets thrown in, whether the tiger roars or begs, or doesn't.

^^what happened to the interview, did you make it through?h:

 

[coyote]

 

[Hellhound]

^ Perfect.