"She's out of my league"

ANNomaly

ANNomaly

Well-known member
Aside from the occasional celebrity crush, I don't believe I've ever been attracted to anyone completely out of my league. More often than not, they just didn't return my feelings.
 
D

Dex Dorrey

Active member
theres someone i like who i know is definitely out of my league....i thought she was maybe a couple pegs above me if i didnt have SA, but then i saw her boyfriend and was like holy sh!t...im a straight guy and i had a fking crush on the dude, and immediately i was just like yeah it aint gonna happen....unfortunately at my job its either the hottest fking chicks youve ever seen or its 40-50 year old, chain smoking, married uggos
 
upndwn

upndwn

Well-known member
I always think every girl is automatically out of my league, thus I never do anything when I get a crush on someone. Every girl I have ever been with has approached me and it still puzzles me how anyone would ever wanna be with me.

I know I shouldn't have so little faith in myself, but fighting off depression and serious self-esteem problems makes it nigh impossible for me to consider anyone to be within my reach. I currently have a crush on someone who waiters at one of the local restaurants. Everytime I'm there we smile and crack jokes and generally get along great, but I never manage to build up the courage to ask her out. I think she's beautiful, sexy, smart and funny and we share the same taste in music and generally have great chemistry. But I realize this is all to good to be true so I automatically distance myself. Today I went right by her and I didn't even say hello.

When i get home I get really angry at myself for not being able to follow my heart. What's the worst that could happen I tell myself. But the truth is I fear rejection more than I fear almost anything else. It's come to the point where I'm starting to feel contempt with being alone. In a sense I feel that everyone is out of my league.
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
I'm sitting in my favorite local hang-out, having dinner

can't help but notice all the beautiful woman

some are just drop-dead hot

and yet the guys they're with all look like pretty average, run-of-the-mill schmucks

i'm not making this up

the point is - don't sell yourself short
 
upndwn

upndwn

Well-known member
coyote said:
I'm sitting in my favorite local hang-out, having dinner

can't help but notice all the beautiful woman

some are just drop-dead hot

and yet the guys they're with all look like pretty average, run-of-the-mill schmucks

i'm not making this up

the point is - don't sell yourself short
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Absolutely. Several of my friends have what I would call less than average looks, yet they are all in relationships with beautiful women. Self-confidence can take you far. Unfortunately it is something I sorely lack at the moment.
 
upndwn

upndwn

Well-known member
Tino said:
Hearing that ugly blokes are getting some irritates and confuses me more than it inspires me.
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While appearance might be important for first impressions and some people (especially younger ones), self-confidence is by far the most important aspect of getting a partner. While my friends might be lacking physically, they all have great personalities and a self-confidence and determination that has taken them much farther in life than what I have achieved, even though some of them are 10+ years younger than me. Having a mental disorder truly sucks :(
 
Richey

Richey

Well-known member
coyote said:
I'm sitting in my favorite local hang-out, having dinner

can't help but notice all the beautiful woman

some are just drop-dead hot

and yet the guys they're with all look like pretty average, run-of-the-mill schmucks

i'm not making this up

the point is - don't sell yourself short
Click to expand...

must be some isolated part of town..


its nice when you just see a nice couple who look a bit nerdy and get on well. and not just the typical superfit looking couples.
 
S

sweatz

Member
maan, I always get this kind of feeling due to serious self esteem problem. I always get incredibly nervous around chicks which in turn makes me soaking wet >.<
 
Captain_Lethargy

Captain_Lethargy

Active member
I still feel like anyone I would be attracted to is inherently "out of my league"...although I'm also pretty sure that my feeling this way is a bigger turn-off than anything else.
 
upndwn

upndwn

Well-known member
A friend told me this weekend that every guy could have any girl they want if they new how to act. He came with all the same cliches about being yourself, not taking yourself to seriously and being persistent. Normally I would just scoff at such things, but the guy, who's not the best looking bloke, wanted to prove it to me so when we went to town he challenged me and some other buddies to point out any girl in the room and he would take her home with him that night.

We pointed out the hottest most gorgeous girl in the room, guys were literally swarming around her and neither me nor any of my buddies would ever dare even talking to her. So my friend walks over to her while we are watching from the distance. They soon find a table and sits down. I noticed that my friend was constantly touching her while looking into her eyes (I couldn't make out what he was saying unfortunately). He first started by gently brushing her hair off her face, then touching her shoulder and stroking her arms. When they sat down he carefully held her hands most of the time.

Later that night, when the club closed, I met my friend and the girl outside. They had their arms around each other and had ordered a Taxi back home to him so this guy wasn't just making up stories. There is some sort of trick but I think a big part of it is not to fear anything, if you get rejected just laugh it off and try a new angle or move on to the next girl. Or maybe my friend used a magic love potion or something.
 
Captain_Lethargy

Captain_Lethargy

Active member
I'm not usually all that attracted to the "most beautiful girl in the whole room"-I mean, assuming she is traditionally attractive, I'm probably going to find her attractive-looking, but I'm not necessarily going to be most attracted to her, if that makes sense. I'm generally attracted to quirky, nerdy-looking girls who I feel like I'd be more comfortable with-and I don't mean quirky and nerdy-looking in a negative way, or as if I'd be settling for them when I really want to go out with their "more conventionally attractive" friend. I'm legitimately more interested in those girls because they look like women I might actually be able to be comfortable with and potentially have a relationship with.

Now, keep in mind that this whole hypothetical situation is based on stereotypes and hypothetical people. This hypothetical "beautiful girl" here is your stereotypical glossy "girly" glamour girl type (and I've met several women who fit that "girly" stereotype in a superficial way, but who were legitimately awesome people, and several nerdy girls who were judgmental and slightly crazy. You can't just box real people into these goofy teen movie categories). I just want to be involved with someone I can easily converse with and relate to, and that isn't the case with every girl I meet.

I realize I'm bringing up a lot of stereotypes here (although I'm trying to debunk them at the same time using some of my limited personal experience), and I apologize if I'm treading on thin ice with that.
 
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I

Inferiorpotter

Active member
upndwn said:
A friend told me this weekend that every guy could have any girl they want if they new how to act. He came with all the same cliches about being yourself, not taking yourself to seriously and being persistent. Normally I would just scoff at such things, but the guy, who's not the best looking bloke, wanted to prove it to me so when we went to town he challenged me and some other buddies to point out any girl in the room and he would take her home with him that night.

We pointed out the hottest most gorgeous girl in the room, guys were literally swarming around her and neither me nor any of my buddies would ever dare even talking to her. So my friend walks over to her while we are watching from the distance. They soon find a table and sits down. I noticed that my friend was constantly touching her while looking into her eyes (I couldn't make out what he was saying unfortunately). He first started by gently brushing her hair off her face, then touching her shoulder and stroking her arms. When they sat down he carefully held her hands most of the time.

Later that night, when the club closed, I met my friend and the girl outside. They had their arms around each other and had ordered a Taxi back home to him so this guy wasn't just making up stories. There is some sort of trick but I think a big part of it is not to fear anything, if you get rejected just laugh it off and try a new angle or move on to the next girl. Or maybe my friend used a magic love potion or something.
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Now that's what I call REAL self-confidence. So he slept with her huh? You talked to him since? lol and you sure she's not an escort service girl?
 
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