The title is kind of self explanatory, I don't usually like discussing this with most people but I kind of need help.
You see the problem is, I have only ever had one relationship my whole life and after that ended, trying to think in a positive outlook has been murder to do. Basically my previous relationship lasted about 2 months and I got the blame of the break up thanks to my SA (boring bastard apparently). After that I have had a massive constant thought of being a lesser person than others. I have tried to build self respect and courage as a person but I can't. I almost feel like I would bore the person I would go out with because I know instantly I am a boring person.
Maybe this is because of my previous relationship not being the most stable, she wasn't sane to say the least. I mean who would be sane enough to go out with a person that is obsessed with a non existent universe and has nothing else to talk about besides video games and films.
This is also another reason why I obsess over video games, books and films too much, escaping reality just for a little while helps me escape the person I am. Sometimes I think "Maybe I should change" but then, I would end up doing me no favors, changing my personality to fit someone else's is insane and ridiculous.
So you see, I am stuck in a loop, I don't know where to go or what to do to help my self confidence or well being.
You see the problem is, I have only ever had one relationship my whole life and after that ended, trying to think in a positive outlook has been murder to do. Basically my previous relationship lasted about 2 months and I got the blame of the break up thanks to my SA (boring bastard apparently). After that I have had a massive constant thought of being a lesser person than others. I have tried to build self respect and courage as a person but I can't. I almost feel like I would bore the person I would go out with because I know instantly I am a boring person.
Maybe this is because of my previous relationship not being the most stable, she wasn't sane to say the least. I mean who would be sane enough to go out with a person that is obsessed with a non existent universe and has nothing else to talk about besides video games and films.
This is also another reason why I obsess over video games, books and films too much, escaping reality just for a little while helps me escape the person I am. Sometimes I think "Maybe I should change" but then, I would end up doing me no favors, changing my personality to fit someone else's is insane and ridiculous.
So you see, I am stuck in a loop, I don't know where to go or what to do to help my self confidence or well being.