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Old 11-05-2012
jryden's Avatar
Intermediate User
 

but I am not going to go.

My phone rings, I don't recognize the number but I assume its one of the many companies I have been applying to. I ignore it as usual. Figured they'd leave a mssg and they did. She says to call her back to schedule an interview.

First, I am excited. My first real interview. That lasts 10-15 secs before I start crying and having an anxiety attack.

So I'm probably not going to go. Its a far job anyway and I don't have a car at the moment. I applied thinking no one would reply. <--me making excuses

Once again SA/GA/Shyness/Selective Mutism/Whateverelseihavewrongwithme wins :(
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Old 11-05-2012
coyote's Avatar
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one step at a time

first step - call back

just concentrate on that

when that's done you can worry about the next step
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Old 11-05-2012
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well you got a reply for an interview which isn't a bad thing, but I get the point if it's far away, even if you had a car, then you had to think about the cost in gasoline and such if it really paid off.
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Old 11-05-2012
 

Well at least you've made an effort going out and looking for a job, even applying to multiple companies. That's a good step in the right direction!

Perhaps you could find some professionel help regarding panic attacks? Or are you already in therapy for the other mental health issues you're currently dealing with?
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Old 11-05-2012
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jonas89 View Post
well you got a reply for an interview which isn't a bad thing, but I get the point if it's far away, even if you had a car, then you had to think about the cost in gasoline and such if it really paid off.
I'd have to sort through many bookmarks to find this job but from what I remember its $12/hr, an entry level job requiring specific degrees. That's pretty good! Its not going to buy me a car anytime soon but If I already had a car, gas would be taken care of.
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Old 11-05-2012
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Raichel View Post
Well at least you've made an effort going out and looking for a job, even applying to multiple companies. That's a good step in the right direction!

Perhaps you could find some professionel help regarding panic attacks? Or are you already in therapy for the other mental health issues you're currently dealing with?
Yea, I kind of have no choice but to find a job. Its not so much of a step. I feel forced to do this. :(

I know I need help but I dont really want it. I want a way to deal with this that doesn't require seeing someone. Its a pride issue.
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Old 11-05-2012
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before you make any interactions with the company/staff just focus on breathing, inhale slowly and hold for 2 seconds, then exhale and do that a couple times and then get a positive thinking going. say even though i dont have a car, ill bike, that way i can get good exercise in, and ill be outside enjoy nature and the breeze. hope this helps, good luck!
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Old 11-05-2012
 

Yeah, I can relate. I feel anxious too when someone leaves a message telling me to call back which means I have to do the greeting and the introduction. When I call back, many times, I was hoping the other person doesn't pick up so I get to leave a message instead.
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Old 11-05-2012
EscapeArtist's Avatar
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Awws i'm sorry. But Coyote is right. One step at a time! Your standards maybe are a bit high for yourself. You did so well just to apply to the place! Goodjob! That's such a big step, when you're ready sometime in the future, you will want to call one of these people back, maybe in a moment when you'll feel unexpectedly able to.
I had a similar experience. I got a job call when I submitted a resume, not expecting them to actually consider it. I went for the interview, and they called probably to say I got the job. I didn't pick up. Or call back.

It happens, but we have taken steps. Congrats on getting out there and looking for a job
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Old 11-05-2012
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EscapeArtist View Post
Awws i'm sorry. But Coyote is right. One step at a time! Your standards maybe are a bit high for yourself. You did so well just to apply to the place! Goodjob! That's such a big step, when you're ready sometime in the future, you will want to call one of these people back, maybe in a moment when you'll feel unexpectedly able to.
I had a similar experience. I got a job call when I submitted a resume, not expecting them to actually consider it. I went for the interview, and they called probably to say I got the job. I didn't pick up. Or call back.

It happens, but we have taken steps. Congrats on getting out there and looking for a job
How did the Interview go?
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Old 11-05-2012
 

'Showing interest'

seems to being the agenda of 'call me back' people. My switch is generally set to 'off', however much I want and deserve the job. I am sure that however I behave during a call, I'll be vetted immediately if I don't show the key points they're are waiting for. I guess a burst out into laughter will push their buttons and strike a chord. It's not beyond me to act on the phone that I say "Yeeaahhh!!!! I luvvv that job!! Yeahhhhh!!!!" but one word about tech details in the spec will result in a hangup

I feel that a carefully-concocted CV should be the utmost way to impress and prove worthiness. Being prompted with 'how are you?' leads to failure. It's NOT my status that becomes difficult. It's mere scum lowlife of expressions that I can't take seriously. Capable of 'OK', but more likely that I'd harshly criticise for simple smalltalk
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Old 11-08-2012
 

Your situation is exactly what I used to face. Ignored the phone call, made any possible excuses to avoid ob interviews. However, I needed a job to survive, therefore I made my decision and tried several job interviews.

In my opinion, you should first set a goal (something as simple as buy a phone, get a certificate or have money to travel...) then, your goals will encourage you to get a job and give you a chance to communicate with people as well.

My goal now is to get enough money for my bachelor degree

Hope it help.
steven2393 is offline  
Old 11-08-2012
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Atrus View Post
Hello jryden.
Pride? Are you absolutely certain without any doubt that pride has denied you access to help?

Fear does create invisible barriers for ourselves. That's the unfortunate and unavoidable truth. Anxiety attacks are painful so of course we'll try to avoid them. Everyone who has ever experienced social anxiety can relate to this aversion. Please disregard the reason why you won't speak with a professional for one brief moment. Do you want the opportunity to be given help? Do you want help?

Only you can answer that question. I promise we'll all respect your decision. This is a safe place which is judgement free. Most people with social anxiety disorder will never enlist professional aid. How many of those people, would you suppose, avoid help for the single reason of nerve wrecking phone conversations? The only thing that matters is whether or not you want help. After that it's just the matter of finding the right resources help you.
I don't think pride is what gets in the way. I live in America, and the health care system here is scary. I have health insurance but it doesn't cover psychologist or psychiatric services. Being lower middle class doesn't help because I don't qualified for Medicaid which is for poorer people. I certainly don't have the money to pay out of pocket health care costs. I already have student loan debt in the thousands and the last thing I want is accumulate more debt (whether in education, health care, etc).
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Old 11-08-2012
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What kind of job is it? I think you should go for the interview.
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