Falling for life wave after wave- a blog

yeah Hidwell, I like to be on a beach with no one on it. When there are people I can't wait for them to leave.

That'd be a dream to live next to some woods, Molly. You're own bit of bush to retreat to a life saver indeed.

That Einsteen quote, is something I have thought about, but struggled to put into words. When I was young there was so much pressure and expectation to become someone I wasn't. No I realise that who I am, and it is fine.

I'll show you some of the sights around Coffs if you have the time, MikeyC.

A good morning this am, photographing the sunrise and a 10km run. Sometimes you've got to get out there and face your fears. Fear mostly exists in that place between my ears.

Such pleasant company sitting on the barnacled rock waiting for my old friend the sun. Clouds, waves rolling in splashing over the wet rocks, bony barancles and green algae, the retreating waves sucking back with a soft hiss. The piping call of four Sooty Oystercatchers in a territorial flight, two horses and their riders exercising in the backwash, surfers running along the beach boards tucked under their arms searching for the place to paddle out for that first wave. The sun began to illuminate the bank of clouds like a pink searchlight. The sun always comes up for me, never fails. A thing of beauty.

It was a cold morning and I went to bed early so I would wake up early enough to get a 16km run in. I was freezing in bed, curled into a ball to try and get warm. Before dawn it was 2.5 degrees.

I struggled into my running shorts found a tech shirt. The hardest part was walking to the end of my street, with the cold in my lungs, making my eyes water. I stretched under the old Ironbark tree, trying not to shiver.

Then I started to run, and I had heaps of energy right from the start. A group of cyclists came up from behind.

"Runner up," one of them said. "He's a runner, not a jogger." That made me feel great. I was too cold to say thanks, but I gave them a big thumbs up.

I made it to the half way mark. And the sun was up. The creek was at high tide, and the water was a deep blue, the mangroves a brilliant gold. Sea gulls and a few Pelicans were resting on the sandbar. I ran the board walk, my feet thud, thudding on the wooden boards.

This is beautiful, I love this, I thought. A great big happy even now hit me right in the guts. Something to be glad to feel alive about when just earlier in the week I was struggling to see hope.

I finished, and put my hand on my hips, tired, but the sense of achievement was huge. I got it done, and if I run tomorrow it will be my biggest week of the year.

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A few days ago I posted some of my photos on the organisations social media site. Before I left work our image librarian left a message asking for me to share my photos with the image library and that "We need beautiful images to share with the world." That felt so good, I put my head in my hands and cried. Through my photography perhaps someone can finally see through my anxiety to a part of me that is real. I can share the joy and peace I feel trying to capture these photos. That is a part of me, possibly the best part of me.

Today I walked along Sandy Beach my eyes closed to what is around me. My eyes closed by thoughts. Blue skies, endless beaches, grassy headlands and offshore islands. My friends the sun and the sea. I couldn't see them at all, blind to the beauty. How can I not be happy with all that to see? Every now and again I tune into that and I realise how lucky I am. When I am troubled it is as if nature makes it itself known to me, it is there, a constant, whenever I need it.

And the thing with nature, is that it is neutral, not positive or negative, not kind or unkind, angry or sad, forgiving or judgemental, it is just there. Like my thoughts should be. And nature takes me out of my thoughts for while, and carries me away in a stream of sound, colour and detail, and so I find peace, and forget this concept of self, and become lost in play like I remember I did once as a child.

Kiwong said:

Today I walked along Sandy Beach my eyes closed to what is around me. My eyes closed by thoughts. Blue skies, endless beaches, grassy headlands and offshore islands. My friends the sun and the sea. I couldn't see them at all, blind to the beauty. How can I not be happy with all that to see? Every now and again I tune into that and I realise how lucky I am. When I am troubled it is as if nature makes it itself known to me, it is there, a constant, whenever I need it.

And the thing with nature, is that it is neutral, not positive or negative, not kind or unkind, angry or sad, forgiving or judgemental, it is just there. Like my thoughts should be. And nature takes me out of my thoughts for while, and carries me away in a stream of sound, colour and detail, and so I find peace, and forget this concept of self, and become lost in play like I remember I did once as a child.

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This must be the most beautiful and poetic thing I've read in a long while.

SweetSurrender said:

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Thanks Sweet Surrender, that's so lovely and kind.

^ Thanks so much Tree Bones, your words made me happy, thank you.

Kiwong said:

^ Thanks so much Tree Bones, your words made me happy, thank you.

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good, I'm glad

If I'm ever in Coffs, we'll have to go out and you can tell me all the different types of flora and fauna we see. You'd be the best tour guide.

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Me standing next to a big Narrow-leaved Peppermint (Eucalyptus radiata).

MikeyC said:

If I'm ever in Coffs, we'll have to go out and you can tell me all the different types of flora and fauna we see. You'd be the best tour guide.

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Yeah Mikey, I know where to find Koalas, Kangaroos and Yobbos.

Kiwong said:

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Me standing next to a big Narrow-leaved Peppermint (Eucalyptus radiata).

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Amazing tree lovely

It's a survivor like me.

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Shannon Creek Boronia

My thoughts were really troubling this afternoon on my walk. Worrying about a work situation I feel I have no voice in. I have rarely felt so disliked, and even though I love this earth, it is as if my fellow work colleagues have decided I am not good enough. They assume they know me.

I really would like to spend as much time away from people as I can right now.

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Wow, nice spot - I can imagine people in ancient times sitting there looking out into the distance. I hope your work worries resolve :thumbup:

kihira said:

Wow, nice spot - I can imagine people in ancient times sitting there looking out into the distance. I hope your work worries resolve :thumbup:

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It sure is a great lookout. Thanks Kihira, today wasn't as bad I thought it might be.

You should wear a helmet cam and film some of the places you go.

^ My camera actually does take videos and you can edit them in photoshop. The clouds were pretty boring so I tried to take a video instead. The quality isn't great.