appearing un-excited/un-interested

recluse

recluse

Well-known member
Does anyone else feel that they have a hard time appearing interested and excited? For example when someone gives me a Christmas present i think that i appear dissapointed or something even though i am not, i have this obsession about how my facial expression suits the moment if you know what i mean. For example if someone says a joke i am afraid that my face is serious and they will judge me for not getting the joke.
 
Infected_Malignity

Infected_Malignity

Well-known member
yeah. i guess it's just one of those things you gotta show without worrying about the outcome. if you're too worried, nothing comes naturally. i've been there before but i'm learning to loosen up. and by that, i mean both literally and figuratively!
 
Danfalc

Danfalc

Banned
Yeh defo,a while back when i was actualy going out a little bit.I was in this club having a game of pool and what not.Anyway point being i just couldnt relax 8O and this girl get coming over going "awr are you okay? you look bored" ect

So yeah i feel like that but ive also had it pointed out to me.I guess its because we struggle to focus externaly and focus on whats going on around us because were too worried bout whats going on inside us.
 
4seasons

4seasons

Well-known member
Yeah, this is a big one for me. Everyone always says I'm so mono-toned or non-energetic, people trying to be nice about it say I'm "laid back". Just today a customer actually said to me "you don't have a lot of energy do you". When ever a customer tries to engage on a conversation they just stop talking because I look like I'm being an ass hole. I actually try to.
 
Zarrix

Zarrix

Well-known member
Sure thing. I try to appear excited, but I can rarely pull it off. It is because our feelings are being blocked, so we aren't getting any exciting feeling to express.

It isn't like you feel excited inside at all, but simply can't show it. All these feelings are blocked most of the time. After all, being excited reveals way too much about you.
 
Carstuar

Carstuar

Well-known member
There aren't a lot of things that can get me excited. The rare times that I do, I sometimes over-express it, and get strange looks. It's really embarassing, and I just want to be invisible afterwards.

When people are trying to have a conversation with me, I really don't know how to fake being interested. I can make a half-assed attempt by saying "ah, I see" or something like that, but the other person almost always senses that I just want to get away. It's not just because I find other people's interests so extremely boring, but mostly because I can't seem to pay attention and try to figure out what to say next at the same time.
It's the same when I chat on the internet, but at least then I can pretend to be afk.
 
Zarrix

Zarrix

Well-known member
On the rare occasion, I tend to over-do my excitement and get the complimentary weird looks too.
 
X

xSleepy

Well-known member
It depends on the situation. I have a hard time being excited about gifts too. Im get kinda blank.

But if my friend buys me something I really wanted then I might jump around like a weirdo.
But most of the time I have to fake being happy and excited so they wont feel bad.

Or if were going somewhere fun I usually dont act excited either. Like going to disneyland! Ill act like miss cool, but in the inside im jumping for joy, lol
 
recluse

recluse

Well-known member
IcarusUnderWater2 said:
I dread people telling me jokes because although i appreciate them and find them funny I never actually find it funny enough to laugh out loud. When i don't laugh etc they seem awkward so i put on this smile and comment like 'nice one'... but then I realise the joke isn't finished and im thinking "plz just shut up!!".

Same thing applies to presents. I am happy inside but... it's just a present and i never feel the need to say "WOW THIS IS AMAZING". So i just smile and say thanks a lot. People expect some kind of performance but its hardly life changing is it.
Click to expand...

So true!
 
recluse

recluse

Well-known member
Recently i went to Poland to meet an online friend for the first time, she showed me around Krakow and i was trying to appear interested when she was telling me the history of the places, and she told me ''I don't think you are interested are you!'' and she seemed quite offended probably because i appear distant most of the time especially as i was tired after travelling there, but i was interested it's just that i am not one of these ''WOW! COOL!'' jump around with excitement kind of guy. I was told by one online friend that i was cold at times even though this person had never met or spoke to me in person! I'm not cold i'm actually very warm but i just have a hard time appearing that way.
 
ripewithdecay

ripewithdecay

Well-known member
The worst thing is when someone says something jokingly or teases you and then they say something like "Oh, it was just a joke by the way." As if they needed to reassure me so I wouldn't get offended. The problem is that they will say that even though I'm smiling and chuckling or laughing a bit. But i'm sure as heck not frowning and giving them the cold stare!
Also, saying something funny is almost impossible. However, I find that when I just say something ridiculous and random that comes to my mind, and out of nowhere just blurt it out, usually that's when someone bursts out laughing. And I think to myself "Wtf? Was that even funny?"
So it's almost like trying to be funny isn't funny, but not trying to be funny and just speaking your mind is apparently hilarious at times. Try it! I guess?
 
Borx

Borx

Member
my partner is also like this , when i have bought him something in the past that i know he wants alot he will barely say anything . i have told hin that the reason i buy him something he wants is to make him happy and its nice to feel appreciated from my prespective , so he has got a bit better with this now( and thats all i want ) . I think that two people like to benefit from giving a present , the person recieving get a kind gesture and the person giving feels a little appreciated. Alot of the time its not about the present ! [/quote]
 
IceLad

IceLad

Well-known member
Yes I can totally relate to this.

My facial expression tends to be very deadpan. If you don't know me very well, one of the problems with this is that people don't know whether I'm joking with them or being deadly serious.
 
dan_e

dan_e

Well-known member
yeah I feel like people think I'm not interested because of my reaction (or how they perceive my reaction). And then they stop inviting you places or some even seem to get angry.
 
Day_Tripper

Day_Tripper

1
Yes, that's me around people who aren't close friends. But it's mainly because you can't really be non-talkative and energetic at the same time, I guess. If I could think of things to say, I'd be smiling more and having more energy. But it would be f***ing creepy to be smiling all the time without saying anything.
 
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