JuanErenas
Member
I can relate to you. I used to be the kid that no one really wanted to be around, and I understand what it feels like to not really have friends.
The thing is, you grew up in a screwed up family, and it's nearly impossible not to grow up screwed up too. That happened to me too. My father was a cheating, beating alcoholic.
What's the good news? You can change. Everything is changeable. And I don't mean change your personality. Don't try to change who you are and act like someone else, God no. It seems like you're already a great, well intentioned guy.
Unfortunately, sometimes you'll come across as something different despite your intentions. That seems to be what's happening.
Try focusing on the small things. What do you say when you meet your friend? Do you start talking about yourself, or do you ask how he is and show interest in what's going on in his life? Small things like that.
A great piece of advice: read books on making friends. Look up the author Dale Carnegie, you'll learn a ton from him. You'll start to see the small things you're doing wrong.
And also, it's a great idea to ask your friends what's keeping them away. But keep in mind that not many people will answer to "why do you hate me?" or "Why am I annoying you?" if they answer, they worry about sounding mean.
Instead, ask an easier question like "What do you think I could improve about myself?" Tell them you're working on becoming a better person. Don't mention anything about being annoying. You'll be more likely to get a response.
I hope I helped. Let me know what you think, and good luck!
The thing is, you grew up in a screwed up family, and it's nearly impossible not to grow up screwed up too. That happened to me too. My father was a cheating, beating alcoholic.
What's the good news? You can change. Everything is changeable. And I don't mean change your personality. Don't try to change who you are and act like someone else, God no. It seems like you're already a great, well intentioned guy.
Unfortunately, sometimes you'll come across as something different despite your intentions. That seems to be what's happening.
Try focusing on the small things. What do you say when you meet your friend? Do you start talking about yourself, or do you ask how he is and show interest in what's going on in his life? Small things like that.
A great piece of advice: read books on making friends. Look up the author Dale Carnegie, you'll learn a ton from him. You'll start to see the small things you're doing wrong.
And also, it's a great idea to ask your friends what's keeping them away. But keep in mind that not many people will answer to "why do you hate me?" or "Why am I annoying you?" if they answer, they worry about sounding mean.
Instead, ask an easier question like "What do you think I could improve about myself?" Tell them you're working on becoming a better person. Don't mention anything about being annoying. You'll be more likely to get a response.
I hope I helped. Let me know what you think, and good luck!
