Troubles with smiling

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Haruhiist

Well-known member
I always have problems that my mind create for some reason. Like my unconsciousness wants to bug me. Lately, I have this problem to smile. When I don't think about it, I smile when people say something funny. But when I realize I'm doing so, I suddenly have this weird awkward smile, my lips tremble and stuff, and I can't control it.

I hate it, because every time I do that, people feel bad, and I feel bad too. It's an instant conversation killer. I wish I could do something about it...
 
zav943

zav943

Well-known member
A smile is supposed to be spontaneous, not forced...otherwise, if you think about it, you'll mess it up big time

Let me ask you this: Is it easy for you to put on a perfect smile for, say, a driver's license photo?
 
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OneOh1

Well-known member
i force myself to smile by thinking of the most goofiest, funniest, dumbest, thoughts I can imagine. anything that can make me chuckle.
it's hard, i understand. Laughing is really the only way I can smile
 
H

Haruhiist

Well-known member
zav943 said:
A smile is supposed to be spontaneous, not forced...otherwise, if you think about it, you'll mess it up big time

Let me ask you this: Is it easy for you to put on a perfect smile for, say, a driver's license photo?
Click to expand...

Yes, I can't smile before the camera.
And I didn't have this problem before. It's something really recent. I wish I didn't constantly think about it in a conversation.
 
Uber Schnitzel

Uber Schnitzel

Well-known member
If Arnie can do it anyone can... :D
250px-Smile!.jpg
 
minnow

minnow

Well-known member
I can't help you because unfortunately I have the same problem with smiling at anyone outside of my immediate family. I think perhaps it is because it is a nervous smile not because something is funny like a really mild form of hysteria.
Or as I have been told I have by the doctor inappropriate emotional response syndrome. I am pretty sure I haven't helped but maybe I gave you a couple of possible though improbable reasons...Yea I'm crazy.
 
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Danedo

Member
Ha! I have this problem too at times!

I think it is just another form of self consciousness and, obviously, anxiety in my mind.

The process I go through is similar to yours:

1) Engage in conversation
2) Smile, either on purpose or just because
3) Realize I am smiling/people are seeing me smile
4) FREAK OUT
5) Start to try to either kill smile or look away
6) FREAK OUT that step 5) is FREAKING them out
7) If conversation over, END, else GOTO step 4)

Can you spot the cognitive error?
Step 6: How do I know what they are feeling? Most likely I am basing how they are feeling based on how I am feeling. Perhaps I will look at their face and try to read it.

The problem is that no matter what their face is, I will likely read a negative emotion, as my state of mind is in a sort of panic.

Of course, life would be easier if step 3 never occurred, or I guess if 4-7 didn't happen, but that isn't how it is at the moment.

I've been fighting these sort of negative chain reactions of thoughts and emotions for some time now.

It helps to know that what I feel and think often do not reflect reality.
 
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Haruhiist

Well-known member
You're right. After all, there is no need for step 3 and 4. I didn't have it before, why have it now? But god damn, it's like someone's telling you "try to not think of the word 'penguin' ", and you'll end up doing it!

But I heard there are things that can control your subconsciousness, like meditating. That way, you can overcome your subconsciousness to think that smiling is a bad thing. I wish I mastered that somehow...
 
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chrisjurban

Well-known member
yeah sometimes when I'm with people I'll be smiling and I can't keep it up for long because my facial muscles start to tremble and shake. actually it happens a lot. people also comment on how i rarely smile.
 
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spider04

1
Someone at school called me smiley because im always smiling and doesn't talk too much, i can't help but smile when certain people talk to me:D::eek::
 
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userremoved

Guest
I have this problem even with friends I'm comfortable with sometimes. It might sound stupid but I always find an excuse to look away at something or cover my mouth like I'm thinking to disguise it. x_x Being completely comfortable is the only real solution I know of but thats easier said than done.
 
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