So when i get a new job....

[recluse]

What then?! I'll be getting more money.......For what!? Big f##king deal! I may as well live in poverty for the rest of my life because money is not going to give me a normal happy life, wtf is the use when all i do is sit in my room every night you don't need much money if you have no social life::

 

[AGR]

Tell me about it,today I went to an interview and there I realised there is no point,I only work to make other people rich those days,if it wasnt for my family I would just go and do nothing,maybe sell some ice cream on the beach,those guys look happy,looks like they have fun everyday.

 

[dooby-duck]

I'm glad I've got a job even though I only work for my parents. I am very grateful for that. If I didn't work I think it wouldn't take that long before I stopped leaving the house. Working is about the only exposure to people I get. I am forced to face my fears, talk to people, answer the phone etc. But because I work for them I can also control situations and avoid stuff. As for the money I hardly spend any of it.

 

[Harleyq]

I'm glad I've got a job even though I only work for my parents. I am very grateful for that. If I didn't work I think it wouldn't take that long before I stopped leaving the house. Working is about the only exposure to people I get. I am forced to face my fears, talk to people, answer the phone etc. But because I work for them I can also control situations and avoid stuff. As for the money I hardly spend any of it.

This. Also, you never know. The last job I had, I didn't really make any friends but then this year when I started working for my old boss again, I became friends with a busser. A job will at least give you a chance to develop some kind of social life - more of a chance that being in poverty will, anyways.

 

[FountainandFairfax]

I agree with what the people are saying above, Recluse. I don't see the job doing anything to hurt your odds of making friends.

And until then, instead of worrying about how you have no friends to socialize with and to spend the money on, spend the money on yourself. Get a better TV, get a better car, buy new clothes. Buy things that you will enjoy and improve your quality of life.

It might sound superficial at first, but improving your surroundings can make you feel much better and give you newfound confidence and a feeling of hope.

Kinda like the old saying goes, "Dress for success."

 

[Meggerz88]

That is the kind of thinking that only serves to justify your anxieties. This is dangerous thinking if you ever want to get better. I know because I do it all the time. You are making excuses for yourself to avoid uncomfortable senarios. You have to just remind yourself what you really want out of life and go get it.

 

[Justas]

You'll get confidence. And as a Fairfax said invest it in yourself, atleast people will look at you better. You'll look more successful. Social life is all about a mask.

 

[Nack]

That's what i thought when i had gotten my first job, i thought everything would change but nothing much really happened. The money was coming in, but i didn't really care for it. I mean the only thing i use that money for is to pay my debt...some entertainment items. That's pretty much, money doesn't do anything.

 

[cosmosis]

For those of us who dislike social life because it is a mask, money won't fix that. Buying cool clothes and driving a nice car to buy social status is what I hate about 'social life'. Count me out please if I have to buy my way into social life...I would rather find people who don't care about how much I own or how fancy my job is...

 

[Flo]

Tell me about it,today I went to an interview and there I realised there is no point,I only work to make other people rich those days,if it wasnt for my family I would just go and do nothing,maybe sell some ice cream on the beach,those guys look happy,looks like they have fun everyday.

if i could claim disability for whatever it is i have, i would and then become a hermit and have meals delivered to my home and have foil covering all my windows (idk y, just seems like a good idea cuz schiophrenics do it)

 

[Flo]

but having a job just feeds into my anxiety b/c, rite now, i'm working a job that makes just above minimum wage in a rich man's city and i just know ppl are feeling bad for me when they come into my store b/c they know how little i make...if i were to see them out and about, they'd probably put change in my coffee cup

 

[Jake123]

if i could claim disability for whatever it is i have, i would and then become a hermit and have meals delivered to my home and have foil covering all my windows (idk y, just seems like a good idea cuz schiophrenics do it)

Don't forget one of these.
Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie

 

[lurknomore]

To me, having a job is more about doing something productive with my time- ideally it would be something that I enjoy, but even if it isn't, I'm doing something. If you make money above and beyond your responsibilities (food, shelter, and other bills) there are plenty of things that you could do with it besides "social" things... you could indulge in hobbies or other pursuits that you find fun or interesting, or you could set the money aside in a savings or an interest-bearing account to save up for future goals, such as pursuing more education, taking a vacation, or retirement. The point of having employment doesn't have to be so you have money to spend with/on your friends (if you even have any).

 

[cosmosis]

To me, having a job is more about doing something productive with my time- ideally it would be something that I enjoy, but even if it isn't, I'm doing something. If you make money above and beyond your responsibilities (food, shelter, and other bills) there are plenty of things that you could do with it besides "social" things... you could indulge in hobbies or other pursuits that you find fun or interesting, or you could set the money aside in a savings or an interest-bearing account to save up for future goals, such as pursuing more education, taking a vacation, or retirement. The point of having employment doesn't have to be so you have money to spend with/on your friends (if you even have any).

Well said.

And there is also the option of volunteering. Typically its shorter hours and you can generally leave when you want. I find volunteering is a good way to start feeling productive and it makes it easier to ease into that 40 hour paid work if that's what you desire.

 

[froghat]

Hey recluse, after being unemployed for 2 years I got a job 6 months ago. At first it was good getting out there again, but now I think I feel worse about myself than when I was at home doing nothing. Like you said, money is good, but when you are a loner, it's pretty useless. None of my anxiety issues have improved since I got my job and day after day I feel the same horrible feeling. I'm one of the most awkward people and that will never change. I know how you feel...... It's hard to keep hope

 

[Justas]

lurknomore very well said. Some hobbies are money eating hobbies too. Try to think what you want and how money could help that, maybe you get more motivation. I see people who sell newspapers and I know they earn very little, but they look happy.