So what do you do....(warning:self-pitying rant)

[kayelle]

...when you're getting over your anxiety, ever so slightly, day by day, and then a week comes along where you feel like everything you've achieved is worthless and that you've spent all this time trying to recover and for what? So you can still be anxious every day? So you can still have to fight just to do the simplest little things? And then everything you can't do is so much bigger than any of the little things you can do, and you realise your life still sucks, no matter how hard you work.
And then what do you do when you feel like you've no-one to talk to about it? Like people think the progress you've made is worthless too? And it feels like you're back there at the beginning with no progress made, except this time you have responsibilities because you put yourself into something new and challenging (I went back to college) and you can't afford to have a bad week, much less a bad fortnight?
I'm sorry about the rant, I just am so depressed right now and feeling useless. It's like, the success stories say things like, if you keep working at it, it will get better. But what if you've been working and working and working...and it's not getting better?!
::

 

[Nack]

I honestly don't know...I'm as confused as you are. I guess we just have to wait until something good happen. I just got into college also, now im regretting it. But, i'm afraid of dropping out. I don't know the repurcussion of that, and i don't want to find out. It's just i don't see myself contributing to the world in the not so distance future you know. So why go to college? Pressure? Society?

 

[SalemEdgerton1]

Well I can't speak for everyone but I for one don't think any kind of progress is worthless. You have to reward yourself and pat yourself on the back for even the small things. The little things build up into big things. If it's not working exactly as you'd like it then change things up a little bit and try something new. Don't put so much emphasis on the little fallbacks and failures, you won't be able to escape them and they'll just kick over the supports you're building up. Use those failures to move forward. You'd be surprised how a little optimism can go a long way.

 

[worrywort]

I'd come to social phobia world and vent my arse off and feel comforted that there are other sane people like me that find life equally as overwhelming.

 

[kayelle]

Yeah, I'm usually a pretty optimistic person, it's just that I suddenly just stopped last week all of a sudden, and I couldn't see anything about my progress to be good, I even tried writing a big long list of new things I could do, but they just seemed pathetic. I think it's even more annoying because I can usually see the good in my failings, but this week just...bla!

@ Nacke: I went to college cos I actually love my course! I'm doing science and I really love learning that stuff, it's everything else that's the problem, ha! Like the lectures, the presentations, the people, the exams...I guess that all got on top of me aswell and made me overwhelmed.

Thanks guys! ::

 

[SalemEdgerton1]

Yeah, I'm usually a pretty optimistic person, it's just that I suddenly just stopped last week all of a sudden, and I couldn't see anything about my progress to be good, I even tried writing a big long list of new things I could do, but they just seemed pathetic. I think it's even more annoying because I can usually see the good in my failings, but this week just...bla!

@ Nacke: I went to college cos I actually love my course! I'm doing science and I really love learning that stuff, it's everything else that's the problem, ha! Like the lectures, the presentations, the people, the exams...I guess that all got on top of me aswell and made me overwhelmed.

Thanks guys! ::

Well just realize that it's a passing feeling if you're normally optimistic. Don't let it tear you down and dwell on the things that are going well.

 

[Nack]

It sounds like you just had some kind of mid-life crisis/realization/enlightenment. I envy you.

 

[kayelle]

I don't feel enlightened. I've hit a bump, and nothing good has come out of it. I'm depressed and I feel hopeless, and like I'm back as anxious as I used to be. I didn't want to leave the house today. Instead I just sat in the dark in my room for 7hours today doing absolutely nothing. Just sitting there. I'm hoping that something will come along to boost my morale, like achieving a bigger goal or a nice reward for the stuff I've done so far...hopefully an opportunity will present itself, i'll still try and go to college tomorrow and see what happens

 

[SalemEdgerton1]

Well until then focus on something that makes you life and/or smile and see if that at least helps things out a bit.