probable stupid but.......

crazycatlady27

crazycatlady27

Well-known member
i am terrified, i have my daughters christmas play next week and i scared to go , i hate going anywhere near the school as i get judged a lot as the parent with the "issues" , but that is not what bothers me most, the thing that i am most scared of is if i have to leave. My daughter would be gutted and it would make me feel like the worst mom in the world and i would probable not be able to forgive myself. i cant take any meds as it would make me paranoid throughout the whole thing, i am taking my mom and my other daughter with me, but i am scared something bad will happen and people will look at me and judge me
:crying:
 
planemo

planemo

Well-known member
crazycatlady27 said:
i am terrified, i have my daughters christmas play next week and i scared to go , i hate going anywhere near the school as i get judged a lot as the parent with the "issues" , but that is not what bothers me most, the thing that i am most scared of is if i have to leave. My daughter would be gutted and it would make me feel like the worst mom in the world and i would probable not be able to forgive myself. i cant take any meds as it would make me paranoid throughout the whole thing, i am taking my mom and my other daughter with me, but i am scared something bad will happen and people will look at me and judge me
:crying:
Click to expand...

do you mean you're afraid you'll be so distressed that you'll leave the play as a result? i think if you talk to your daughter about it, she might understand. a plus point is that you're having to go with two other people, so it will help a lot as being completely on your own, often leads to more panic.

it's a tough situation to be in, and i empathize with you. if you don't go, you feel guilty and not good enough as a parent, but if you do go, you have to face your own insecurities. maybe if you talk to your mom and daughters about it, and if they at least know how you feel at those anxious times, there support and understanding will act as a huge boost to morale.
 
R

Razzlecherry

Banned
One time my younger brother had a basketball game. No one else could go to the game, so my mom asked if I could take him. I didn't want to go and was worried of people looking at me, judging me, etc. I thought to myself that I could just take him there and then leave, so I eouldn't have to go through with this.

My younger brother didn't really enjoy playing. It was kinda something our parents figured was good for him. I realized that I didn't want him to be there alone. I stuck it out and stayed the whole game, so that whenever he felt uncomfortable, he could look over to me and see that I was there.

I didn't even have any thoughts of people looking at me. I watched the game and focused all my attention on my younger brother. Wasn't bad at all.

My point is that I understand how difficult it is to be in situations like that, but I'm sure your daughter may be having uneasy thoughts as well. These kinds of things come like second nature to people without this problem, but when the time really comes we can champ through and be there for the people we care about. I swear we're superhuman.
 
L

laure15

Well-known member
I was in similar situations before. I remembered I had to attend my brother's college orientation during the summer. My mom didn't know the way to his college and needed help driving through the highways so I had to come along, even though I didn't want to. When I got there, we had to walk a lot so I started sweating profusely. Several girls and a guy (who served as orientation leaders, judging from their uniforms and name tags) pointed me out for the sweat stains on my back. They called me "stupid" and "disgusting." I got angry, embarassed, scared, my social anxiety kicked in so I immediately went to the bathroom and tried to dry up my shirt. I told my mother what happened but she kept on telling me to ignore them and get out of the bathroom. Anyways, I ended up skipping the whole orientation and going my own way.

When I was in school, I was bullied in class but I just kept forcing myself to come to class so that I can pass. Even though it hurts everyday to see those bullies gossiping and harassing me, I still went. If I failed those classes, I would be wasting money.
 
I

ImNotMyIllness

Well-known member
Try telling yourself this: "Screw them, I don't care what they think, I am here for my daughter....I'm doing it for my daughter."

Truth is, a lot of them are screwed up parents. They are no better than you!
 
crazycatlady27

crazycatlady27

Well-known member
yeah i think i will have to go in there with a bit of attitude lol i can hide at the back as i am really tall so i can see over all the other heads lol
 
C

cjc

Member
You might be surprised. Many parents at the school may understand your situation more than you think but do not feel it's appropriate to bring it up. Anxiety and panic attacks are very common and I find that more adults are becoming aware of this. I have a friend who has suffered from OCD all her life. She told me that her son's first year in school was so stressful because of a bad teacher and difficult parents that she didn't even want to drive or walk close by. Gradually things improved and she has more insight on that period now. She is fine at the school, able to be there with no issues and the parent that was a trigger for her just doesn't bother her as much, if at all. It took time and her son to move on to a different class. He also had some learning issues that have been addressed. Different stuff has cropped up now, mainly dealing with her teen (just like me!) but she has been seeing a psychiatrist (she recommended him to me for counselling re: my son) and it has helped.
 
dean01

dean01

Well-known member
when i have something i fear going to i try to put it to the back of my mind as the more i dwell on the situation the more i get myself into a state of panic. try and keep busy and deal with life spontaneously.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top