People staring - should I smile or frown?

[Jungle]

Something has been happening a lot to me in public transportation lately , one person staring at me for no apparent reason, women especially, I'd say one fifth of the time.

It's just one person each time, if it was a group of people it would obviously suggest there would be something wrong with my looks/posture....etc.

But it's not the case, so it really boggles my mind.

I am writing this because I am really confused, I don't know what their intentions are, hence what should be my reaction.

Is it because I am an Arab? Given the current circumstances (Terrorism, Arabs having a bad reputation in France ...etc) This would be understandable and I wouldn't blame them for their hostility.

Or is it because they're looking for romance? I highly doubt this because I am far from being a cute guy.

Last time, I was seated at the very back of a Paris metro wagon, there was a middle aged woman facing me and really staring at me, I looked away the first time because I wouldn't know, she kept staring, looked at her the second time, then looked away once more, looking around and acting normally, I could see she was still staring, then I finally looked her right in the eyes in a prolonged period in the vain attempt of probing any facial expression that would give away what was on her mind, I didn't smile nor try to look intimidating. I then looked away out of politeness, because she was like 60. She then looked away and looked down / through the window and stopped staring.

Same thing happened today, but from a girl in her 20s, in a crowded wagon, she stared at me in the same way, but I just pretended not to have noticed.

What should I do ? Smile, and take the risk to wrongly interpret the situation? or just give them a taste of their own medicine and maybe miss the opportunity of making a friend?

 

[kuurt]

Who knows what their intentions are. I would just be friendly and smile. I wouldn't have even known you are Arab. As for you not being a cute guy - everybody has a difference of opinion. There's bound to be girls out there that find you attractive. I think I'm about average looking and I see people uglier than me with mates all the time.

If you do smile at a girl and she smiles back at you, then looks down and away and back up at you again within 45 seconds she probably finds you attractive.

 

[FountainandFairfax]

Just because you don't like your looks doesn't mean they don't, ha ha.

They're probably just checking you out, it's nothing heavy. Just smile back, act like you have appointments to keep and work the mystery angle, at least until you're comfortable enough to engage women in light conversation.

Buy some dark sunglasses if eye contact truly bothers you, that's what I did. It really helps with the "where do I look?" problem when you're out in public.

Sunglasses and smiling, the magic combination for navigating social pitfalls for awkward dorks like us. :bigsmile:

 

[AtTheGates]

What should I do ? Smile, and take the risk to wrongly interpret the situation? ?

YES.


No need to frown. if they dont react positively then oh well, thats on them. dont sweat it.

its hard to know peoples intention's in a situation like that but maybe you could be an example of an arab who goes against the stereo type of what people some people say about arabs.

 

[Jungle]

Thank you for finding the time to reply guys, I really appreciate your feedback.

Yes I agree with you, I see many not so handsome guys with cute girls too, maybe they have money, who knows... just kidding, either they are very confident in themselves or their attitude outweighs their looks.

From now on I'll adopt a more friendly approach.
Honestly I am firm believer that sunglasses and caps should be worn only when there is sun, wearing sunglasses can be useful if you haven't had a good night of sleep though (-= !
I think that some women could be testing guys, staring at him to see if he is ballsy enough to engage a conversation with her.

I was wrong it seems.

Haha! If I exploded in rage from someone staring at me, that would just strengthen the stereotype.