Over analyzing everything!

[recluse]

I'm awake and it's 2am her, and i have to be up at 6am for work. My problem is my over analytical mind which won't allow me to relax.

Ove the past few days it's been bad. Here are some stuff i obsess about -

1) I am convinced that the girl i mentioned about in earlier posts only wants me as a backup o'r second best. this thought has been stronger since i saw she had a pic of this guy she talks to online as her wallpaper. Now i can't stop feeling inferior especially as this guy is a trainee commercial pilot and good looking. I'm always thinking ''She would choose him over me anytime''...This kind of thinking occurs whenever i have a love interest.

2) I will be 28 in April and i have no established life; Nevr had a girlfriend, no place of my own etc...I feel a loser.

3) I am convinced that my family hate me...Everyone in the world infact!

4) I am ugly, boring and no girl will ever want me as a boyfriend.

These are the kind of tortreous thoughts which torment me throughout my waking life.

 

[Klaus]

I can't sleep too... Can't stop thinking about my life...

I had panic attacks all day long.

 

[RND_CHR]

recluse... If I had the same thoughts as you, I'd be having trouble falling asleep too. I get racing thoughts sometimes which make it really hard to be productive. I'm sure things aren't as bad for you as you think they are. Anyways, I hope you feel better tomorrow.

 

[bulldog21083]

I think my biggest problem is I over analyze everything too. And I care too much what other people think about me. I don't want to risk someone not liking me, so I tend to not initiate conversations.

I remember when I was younger (I'm almost 26 now) and I was in school I always wondered when I would get a girlfriend. Now I realize my problem was I just waited around for it to happen instead of pursuing it.

So as I got older I started thinking about it more. I couldn't even really picture myself having a girlfriend. But a few months ago I finally got one. Granted she broke up with me last week, but it was a serious relationship for almost 5 months. I felt like she really understood me and I could be myself around her, and I wasn't even shy around her. So my point is just hang in there and eventually you'll meet the right girl.

After she broke up with me it was kind of a wake up call that I do need to be more social (I didn't talk much around her friends and I think that was a big reason why we broke up). So I really was thinking about it and I've just decided I'm not going to listen to myself when I analyze everything. I'm going to stop caring what other people think of me.

 

[2Crowded]

Hope you got to sleep by now recluse.... its 4:10am for you there i think.

 

[Neph]

buck up chap!! life is not linear

 

[recluse]

Yeah it's a killer because i feel kind of undeveloped in comparisson to my peers..You know the fact that i have never had a girlfriend etc.

I agree that i have to get comfortable in my own skin first, but when is that going to happen? I could be 40, 50, 60 years old by the time i have/if i will get over my anxiety issues and then it will be too late to enjoy life.

 

[20nikki07]

Hi,

I hope you dont mind me posting my reply here.. Its the first time Ive signed in in years so I dont know anyones exact situation, I also realise this post isnt a new one..

..but I found this today after googling 'anxiety, over analyzing everything' and this post if the first one I came across (up until this point Id forgotten I was a member here!).

Anyway(!), I just wanted to say youre not on your own! At the moment my mind is on overdrive, I seem to be constantly thinking/worrying/analyzing everything (and its never a good outcome!) and its driving me mad! None of which is helped by the fact I cant sleep.. the last time I had 8 hours sleep? About 5 or 6 years ago I think!! My sleep patterns are awful right now, always unbroken and never refreshing.. and a tired mind for me means not being able to be rational nor think straight!

I hope things are a little easier for you now, try not to be so hard on yourself


Nikki x.

 

[doesit]

yeah the anxiety is killer at night time,if you can try to work hard or smth for the next day and go to sleep early this usually helps a bit,and speaking about a good sleep ,theres only one day a month where i would wake up relaxed instead of paranoid and tired.

 

[Justas]

I'm overanalyzing too instead of doing my works. I always think whats better and I do nothing. I'm anxiuos all the day. Atleast couple of last months I have quite normal sleep(not everyday ofcourse...). I read a book about healthy sleep. I think it helped me little bit. I can't recommend it, because it's in my native language. But I think you'll find a lot of books in english. The trick that works for me is I'm trying to concentrate on some sort of discomfort. Maybe some beds spring pricks in to your back(don't know how to say that in english). Than you concentrate on that spring I don't know if this will work for you, but anyway you can try Anyway I wake up a lot of times at night, but have some sleep. Another thing is give your body some rest, if you can't get to sleep don't sit on computer or don't watch TV. Atleast give your body some rest

 

[recluse]

Thanks guys i really thought my post had died a long time ago

Where are you from Justas?

 

[Justas]

I'm from Lithuania. I seen you mentioned my country once...

 

[recluse]

Oh. I'm not sure i might have done.

 

[mndigi]

I remember reading the title of this thread last month when it was revived but I didn't delve into it. Today I searched for it on this forum because I have been over-analyzing in a way too!

Well not in the way lots of others are doing it. I used to do that a lot and be very anxious when I was in my late teens (I am 26 now). But what I often do nowadays is over-analyze words I read, especially while studying (I am a graduate student and besides in the industry I am looking to work in, learning is constant!). For example, normally we associate meanings with words from our memory. But I find myself analyzing how that word came to be.

For example, if I read the word carpenter, I start thinking that it's made of carpentry+ "er" for someone doing it. What's bothering me is that now sometimes I feel a mental block while over-analyzing which stops me from doing things normally. But if I shake it off, it becomes okay. Maybe it's exhaustion from all that I am doing.

 

[CeeJay1981]

Over analysing is one of the MANY ways we go UNCONSCIOUS. It's a way of disconnecting from our environment and what is actually happening in the moment. This inward focus makes social interaction pretty difficult. Other ways we go unconscious are things like dissociation (spacing out), over eating, drugs, alcohol, computer games or TV and many others.

It's not very healthy to be stuck in our heads all the time. On the other hand there is a time and place for inward focus. The trick is not to get lost in our negative states. You need to find an activity that gets you out of your head like volunteering maybe. I know it can be difficult but always try and focus on what you WANT and keep your mind away from what you DONT WANT.

Good luck

 

[Jodie-Tyler]

I over think things too,
when ever i walk home, i look at some one passing me and i think they're thinking "omg she's so ugly"

and my mind plays tricks on me, makin me think things tht rnt true.

 

[Nicholas]

I'm the exact same way. Whenever I've met someone for the first time, or have just had a casual conversation w/someone I DO know, I have go over everything I said like a million times just to think about what I said wrong and how that person may have percieved me. I know this has nothing to do with what you're saying, but I'm just giving examples of how my negative thoughts contol my life (and happiness).

Really? Me too, it's amazing. Like, while chatting, everything I can notice automatically becomes something I start to think about, even unconsciously. If the others takes too long to reply, if they say nothing, if they react in a way I wasn't expecting... I start to wonder... Did I bother them? Will they think I am weird, boring, etc? That's why I always repeat myself too much, I feel I need to make things clear enough to avoid being misunderstood and getting paranoid about the fact I might have been misunderstood.

I am convinced that the girl i mentioned about in earlier posts only wants me as a backup o'r second best. this thought has been stronger since i saw she had a pic of this guy she talks to online as her wallpaper. Now i can't stop feeling inferior especially as this guy is a trainee commercial pilot and good looking. I'm always thinking ''She would choose him over me anytime''...This kind of thinking occurs whenever i have a love interest.

Recluse, it happens to me too, and it's not a good sign. I understand I have too many problems to even worry about girls, yet often I can't avoid feeling "needy" and jealous like you do. I don't know why... We already know we need to focus on our problems first and quit obsessing over girls, but... I think we feel pressured and at the same time we feel a girl might help solve most of our problems. The problem is, the probability we will find a girl that is really willing to help us and support us, having so many problems is... not that high. Anyway, just my thoughts...