One year on.....

[MrJones]

Wait, do I know you? ::
But really, I'm glad you joined, you're really an amazing guy and I'm glad you're part of my life now

 

[MikeyC]

Wait, do I know you? ::
But really, I'm glad you joined, you're really an amazing guy and I'm glad you're part of my life now

I'm happy to be a part of yours, too.

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

My sentiments exactly! You are a special guy and a great friend to many!

Very special indeed Many here do consider you a friend, myself included. Happy one year SPW anniversary, Mikey! Hope the next year brings many happy changes for you

 

[MikeyC]

Very special indeed Many here do consider you a friend, myself included. Happy one year SPW anniversary, Mikey! Hope the next year brings many happy changes for you

Thank you, Rose. ::

Hopefully by this time next year my depression and lack of self-esteem and love for myself will be far less than what it is today. I just need to stick to my therapy and hope for results.

 

[MikeyC]

One thing I will add is that, despite my inaction, procrastination, lack of motivation, and other -ation words, I have more of a plan than I did last year. I want to move out and try to gain some independence by living on my own. I'm still a baby, really, living with mummy and daddy. They're good people at heart but they're getting on my nerves.

Living alone might make my relationship with my brother stronger, too. That's been sadly lacking in recent times.

Can't financially do any of this yet, unless I get a better job (ha!), but the foundation is there, if nothing else....

 

[BlueDays]

One thing I will add is that, despite my inaction, procrastination, lack of motivation, and other -ation words, I have more of a plan than I did last year. I want to move out and try to gain some independence by living on my own. I'm still a baby, really, living with mummy and daddy. They're good people at heart but they're getting on my nerves.

Living alone might make my relationship with my brother stronger, too. That's been sadly lacking in recent times.

Can't financially do any of this yet, unless I get a better job (ha!), but the foundation is there, if nothing else....

I know it's ridiculous how high rents are atm. The cheap places are far and few between :/
Keep an eye out for a cheap unit though, you might just have to start out in an old tiny little place.
lol @-ation words

 

[MikeyC]

I know it's ridiculous how high rents are atm. The cheap places are far and few between :/
Keep an eye out for a cheap unit though, you might just have to start out in an old tiny little place.
lol @-ation words

Hey, an old, tiny place will still be my place. I don't need a mansion, as I'll try to have as little furniture as possible (but enough for my CD collection, haha).

Rents are ridiculous, but I'm going to do it. One way or another, I will do it.

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

One thing I will add is that, despite my inaction, procrastination, lack of motivation, and other -ation words, I have more of a plan than I did last year. I want to move out and try to gain some independence by living on my own. I'm still a baby, really, living with mummy and daddy. They're good people at heart but they're getting on my nerves.

Living alone might make my relationship with my brother stronger, too. That's been sadly lacking in recent times.

Can't financially do any of this yet, unless I get a better job (ha!), but the foundation is there, if nothing else....

That is a good foundation. Moving out on your own would be quite something. All that freedom! But of course, so much more responsibility too. It is something I also hope to accomplish. I do feel it would change many things (most for the better!) Good luck to you!

 

[MikeyC]

That is a good foundation. Moving out on your own would be quite something. All that freedom! But of course, so much more responsibility too. It is something I also hope to accomplish. I do feel it would change many things (most for the better!) Good luck to you!

Thanks, and good luck to you, too, my friend.

 

[kilojoule]

One thing I will add is that, despite my inaction, procrastination, lack of motivation, and other -ation words, I have more of a plan than I did last year. I want to move out and try to gain some independence by living on my own. I'm still a baby, really, living with mummy and daddy. They're good people at heart but they're getting on my nerves.

I feel quite strongly that this should be a priority for you Mikey. I know that you will see your confidence and self esteem soar. Have you looked at houseshares or viewed places online? You could definitely afford something since you're working. I am so pleased to hear that you're thinking about it because I swear I just know this will be the making of you. You really just need to feel the fear and do it.

 

[coyote]

One way or another, I will do it.

there's always...

the French Foreign Legion

 

[MikeyC]

I feel quite strongly that this should be a priority for you Mikey. I know that you will see your confidence and self esteem soar. Have you looked at houseshares or viewed places online? You could definitely afford something since you're working. I am so pleased to hear that you're thinking about it because I swear I just know this will be the making of you. You really just need to feel the fear and do it.

Thanks, Jewel. I haven't really started looking, really. I wanted to wait until my car was paid off before I do anything so I could free up some money. Looking now will be a waste.

I also wanted to live alone, but I know I shouldn't be against roommates for a short time if that's going to be easier. Yes, the fear. It's all so...adult. Not really used to that.

there's always...

the French Foreign Legion

Thanks but no thanks. ::

 

[kilojoule]

Thanks, Jewel. I haven't really started looking, really. I wanted to wait until my car was paid off before I do anything so I could free up some money. Looking now will be a waste.

I also wanted to live alone, but I know I shouldn't be against roommates for a short time if that's going to be easier. Yes, the fear. It's all so...adult. Not really used to that.

Renting on your own is expensive and lonely. You can still have your own space sharing with others while splitting the rent and bills and potentially make new friends. Theres no harm in looking at ads online for ppl looking for a housemate. No harm in pricing it. I think youd love it

 

[twiggle]

Renting on your own is expensive and lonely. You can still have your own space sharing with others while splitting the rent and bills and potentially make new friends. Theres no harm in looking at ads online for ppl looking for a housemate. No harm in pricing it. I think youd love it

I think Jewel has made a good point. We often want what we don't have - you want to live on your own right now but maybe it's because you're not doing so at the moment that is making you feel that way.

You could try living with a couple of others on a short-term basis and seeing how it goes, rather than spending a lot of time and effort on finding your own place, furnishing it, buying kitchen utensils etc etc and then possibly not enjoying it and moving back out again. I think that practically it's much easier to move out to a house-share than your own place, far less work to be done in terms of organising etc. It's not uncommon for people to want their own space often. If you can find people to live with who share that notion then you could be sorted, and have the best of both worlds

 

[MikeyC]

Renting on your own is expensive and lonely. You can still have your own space sharing with others while splitting the rent and bills and potentially make new friends. Theres no harm in looking at ads online for ppl looking for a housemate. No harm in pricing it. I think youd love it

I think Jewel has made a good point. We often want what we don't have - you want to live on your own right now but maybe it's because you're not doing so at the moment that is making you feel that way.

You could try living with a couple of others on a short-term basis and seeing how it goes, rather than spending a lot of time and effort on finding your own place, furnishing it, buying kitchen utensils etc etc and then possibly not enjoying it and moving back out again. I think that practically it's much easier to move out to a house-share than your own place, far less work to be done in terms of organising etc. It's not uncommon for people to want their own space often. If you can find people to live with who share that notion then you could be sorted, and have the best of both worlds

Thanks for the advice, ladies. My original plan was to wait until my car's paid off - just under $9,000 to go - but in the meantime buy furniture and kitchenware, and others, to furnish the house I'm going to live in.

You girls have more experience with this than I do, though.

 

[kilojoule]

Thanks for the advice, ladies. My original plan was to wait until my car's paid off - just under $9,000 to go - but in the meantime buy furniture and kitchenware, and others, to furnish the house I'm going to live in.

You girls have more experience with this than I do, though.

I promise I won't keep going on about it (I just want you to be happy) so I'll just say this

That's the arseway of doing it Mikey! That's the most expensive inefficient way of moving out that there is! lol

Look for a place that's already furnished. Look at the shared ads. People looking for a housemate. Those houses are already furnished, all you have to do is turn up and pay one month's rent and one month's deposit. You can still pay off your car loan every month. Your rent should be very manageable , never pay more than one third of your salary on rent. If you wait to move out until your car loan is paid then you'll just think of another excuse not to move out and you'll stay where you are for years being unhappy.

And what is this about buying furniture and house stuff?!?!?! No, big waste of money. And it's unnecessary. You'll find somewhere furnished readily enough and then if you need stuff you can just pick it up bit by bit as you need it. But whatever you do, don't go buying stuff for a house you don't have, that's backwards. Spend that money paying off your car and getting your deposit together. You could be moved out in a couple weeks time if you wanted or less even. It doesn't need to be such a big deal.

I know this is what you want which is why I'm being a bit pushy. It's time Mikey. It's definitely time. And it would not be good for you to live on your own, move in with other people. It would be bad for you to live on your own, it would exacerbate the anxiety. Move in with people. Now start looking online and pulling up ads and even go along to some viewings and get an idea (you don't have to be ready to do it now now now) just go to the viewings and get an idea of what it would be like.

I know from talking to you that you reeeaaallly want this, so pull your finger out and stop making excuses and start looking. It really isn't as much effort as your making it out to be.

Unless you make changes in your life , nothing in your life will change.

 

[MikeyC]

^ Brutally honest, but something to ponder. I'll do some looking at shared apartments/houses. As much as I don't want to live with people, maybe I should do that first. Thanks, Jewel.

 

[coyote]

regardless of whether you live by yourself or with someone else, i would highly recommend NOT buying furniture and housewares ahead of time. you'll just end up kicking yourself for wasting money and filling your home with stuff you won't need. trust me - i've been there. save your money, wait until you move, then pick up things as you need them and as you have room for them.

 

[MikeyC]

Cool, thanks, coyote. Maybe I'll just save money instead.

 

[Nathália]

I'll try to keep this short.

Yesterday marked one year since signing up to SPW.

When I signed up, I was a couple of days away from my relationship with my ex breaking down. After that began some of the worst times of my life in terms of depression. I considered suicide, I almost lost my license twice, I was getting anxious about everything. These reasons are why I decided that giving therapy a shot was a good idea, plus the sexual anxiety I felt with my ex was a good enough catalyst, too.

Today, lots of those problems still remain. I'm still suffering a lot of issues, which I thought were going away but they're not. Therapy is proving useful but I have to keep it going. I still suffer depression and lack of confidence so there's a heap to go yet.

When I broke up with my ex, I piled on weight, too, which I'm in the process of losing - one of my only real achievements over the past year.

Anyway this is already too long. What I really wanted to say was a big thank you to everyone here for their support, friendliness, kindness, compassion, humour, and general greatness over the 12 months I've been a member. It's meant more to me than you think.

Am I tardy for the party? I joined for similar reasons, no thank you because you were one of the most helpful people here when I joined. I didn't expect compassion for my situation because many others had a lot of negative things to say and put me down, but you and many others on here are opposite.

Anyways. *cheers to you mate*