no idea what's going on...

[alice_down_the_rabbithole]

So i've had this feeling of being in a dream sequence for maybe three days now. "dream sequence" is just what i call it, but its just this feeling like i'm detached from everyone, that everything is real except me. It's so hard to describe, and when i tried to describe it to my stepmom she told me i'm just worried and i have to stop thinking about my panic disorder so much. I've experienced it more at school, walking around the crowded hallways, but i also sometimes get it at home. it can get me really scared, especially in some of my classes, and i'll start crying, which is mortifying because i already have social phobia and i don't talk to many people in my classes, so they aren't sure of me and they'll make fun of me at any given chance.
i just want to know if anyone else has ever experienced this, and clue me in to what it might be, i mean i'm just looking for suggestions.
thanks.

alice.

 

[BlueDays]

Could you be depressed? I feel a bit like that when I'm slipping down the hill of depression again. Maybe you should see a doctor.

 

[Hellhound]

I feel like that all the time. All the damn time. Sometimes I wonder if I'm living or dreaming, or if I truly exist, because I don't have a sense of self either... I am a ghost.

 

[alice_down_the_rabbithole]

i know, its really scary. =/ i feel like i'm losing all sanity i have. and it's like nobody understands, either. its so terrible. i feel alone. i feel like i'm not really here at all sometimes.

 

[agoraphobickatie]

aw alice ::
i feel this way (or some way like this) when i get out of the house and go somewhere... i've been doing 'exposure therapy' which means i have to go somewhere i absolutely don't want to go EVERY DAY! haha.. anywho, when i go to public places i feel this kind of weird feeling of panic, kind of like you described.. like if i'm walking around a store, it's like i'm just walking around and things sound different in my head, almost muffled, i always feel like my vision is closing in or something too, it freaks me out.. it's like i'm focusing on every single little feeling/emotion/negative thought i have all at once and i'm not 'with' everyone else.. i see myself as looking CRAZY because i feel that, when really, i just look like a normal person walking around, lol... anyway, i have no idea if this is what you mean that you're feeling, but i know the panic/anxiety, the freakin' onslaught of thoughts, and feeling weird like you can't chill... what's been happening when i go out in public, is i have all those freaky feelings, and i tell whoever i'm with (mom/dad/friend), i'll be like "i feel like shit.. i want to go... i feel like shit" and they just try to talk me through it, tell me "nooo you don't, you're silly, hey look at that shirt!" (haha).. basically, when i get that weird feeling and think "run! get out!" i just force myself to try my best to change my thoughts, focus on something around me, or talk to anyoneee! haha... anyway, this is a clusterfukk of words, sorry! but i hope you find something that helps! i know you hate that feeling, i sorry! ::

 

[divethruhaze]

maybe this?
Dissociation - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[Weirdo]

or maybe it's depersonalization - "Sufferers feel they have changed, and the world has become less real, vague, dreamlike, or lacking in significance. It can be a disturbing experience, since many feel that, indeed, they are living in a "dream".

 

[chained]

maybe dissociation.... I think am experiencing some...

 

[Hellhound]

Depersonalization - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Derealization - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[alice_down_the_rabbithole]

derealization describes it, as does most of dissociation. thank you for the suggestions, guys. :] and i don't know if this is bad to say or not, but i'm glad i'm not alone. the feeling is so strange. & i hope everyone knows that if you ever need help, i'll listen. i'm not sure i can help, since i'm all crazy and stuff (lol) but i'll listen and tell you what i'd do in the certain situation. not sure if that'd help, but i know its always nice to just have someone to listen. =P

katie, it sounds like you get what i get when i'm at school. i know the feeling, its terrible, and especially because the teachers usually won't let me go anywhere or even put my head down so i can calm down, it's just complete hell for me. but maybe it could help me in the long run, since i need to just get over myself. & i hope your exposure therapy is going well. :] i haven't talked to you in so long, haha. 311 forever!