I don't have anyone to talk to or anyone whoever cared to check up on me in my family so I've finally gotten to a point where I don't feel like I need to please everyone. I realized whenever I've reached out to help to anyone, nobody returned my calls but everyone wants my help and it's disgusting. I think I've finally embraced myself and I feel happy and I think it helped kill my SA a little bit and everyone seems to want to be my friend but I realized I don't really care about all that, just set me free. I think I'm going to leave this summer to work out of state for a few months on my own, cause I'm no longer worried about my families feelings or being alone, I've never felt more alone than where I'm at so might as well try to live, I can no longer sit my days in front of my computer upset with life and SA + everything else. So give me freedom or kill me. Thank you for reading just needed to vent a bit, replies are appreciated but I figure I won't get many so it is what it is. Venting.