I'm an Attention Whore without anything interesting to say

[gsmax5]

Recently, I have been getting these urges to yell vulgarities in crappy social situations (e.g. school). It has to do with my longing for attention; I may be Social Phobic, but I still crave attention more than Bono does.

Occasionally, there will be those days where I actually talk at school. After everyone is done being shocked and amazed, they'll start to get annoyed. The weird thing is that I know when they are annoyed, but I continue to say stuff that I know is stupid, meaningless, and not beneficial to society. When people tell me to stop talking, I get deeply hurt and depressed, but at the same time, I continue to say dumb and random shit; I have no rationale behind this, it's sort of like an instinct. I however, usually never open my mouth, but when I do, what I have to say is never really worthwhile.

I'm not really sure why I persist, maybe it's that I think that I'll remind the listener of a topic he is interested in, and that we'll have an interesting conversation.

In the third grade, I remember being rejected for saying some REALLY dumb stuff. I realized that quiet kids (I wasn't one at the time) were generally liked, so I made an effort to reform my personality and shape myself to become "one of them" (note: I've always been extremely "shy" around people I recently met, but shyness around people I know started around 3rd/4th grade).


So yeah, I guess I'm a pathological talker/attention whore with severe Social Anxiety. Have you ever heard of anything like this?

 

[Remus]

histrionic PD perhaps?

then again OCD has made me do pretty bizarre things from time to time

always best to see a shrink but even they dont always get it right

 

[gsmax5]

histrionic PD perhaps?

I looked it up, and it really does sound like me. I definitely had all eight of the symptoms listed here:
http://www.geocities.com/the_linkies/histrionic.html

Histrionic PD is a definite possibility, even though it seems like most of the people with it are "loud women".

 

[Scrabbl]

Careful of the "medical student syndrome"~~ bud =)
it's like a med student would be reading his textbook and he'd be like gosh i'm pretty sure i don't have this disease and that disease, but omg i have symptoms for all the other ones in the whole damn textbook!
Remember it's pretty hard to make a correct diagnosis that's why there r psychologists.
I don't think it's enough to just experience all those symptoms to label urself histrionic - but u gotta have them on a consistent basis - enough for it to be a noticeable problem. But otherwise - I love positive attention. Everybody loves postive attention. But for us who has sp, we don't get it from friends so we do these weird things like dressing funny or behaving in a strange way even if it's subconscious just so that ppl notice us.
I personally would love to be able to do what u do: just saying whatever is on my mind - stupid or not - it's who you are. you're human. you don't have to make everyone laugh all the time, you don't have to contribute something intelligent to humanity, 'cause that's just ridiculous. ppl will like u for your goofy self

 

[gsmax5]

Careful of the "medical student syndrome"~~ bud =)
it's like a med student would be reading his textbook and he'd be like gosh i'm pretty sure i don't have this disease and that disease, but omg i have symptoms for all the other ones in the whole damn textbook!

Haha, yeah you're right, I know what you mean.

I don't think it's enough to just experience all those symptoms to label urself histrionic - but u gotta have them on a consistent basis - enough for it to be a noticeable problem. But otherwise - I love positive attention. Everybody loves postive attention. But for us who has sp, we don't get it from friends so we do these weird things like dressing funny or behaving in a strange way even if it's subconscious just so that ppl notice us.

Yeah very true. Maybe I have normal love for attention, but since I never get any, my desire for it naturally increases.

I personally would love to be able to do what u do: just saying whatever is on my mind - stupid or not - it's who you are. you're human. you don't have to make everyone laugh all the time, you don't have to contribute something intelligent to humanity, 'cause that's just ridiculous. ppl will like u for your goofy self

Thanks, I don't usually ever talk though. The times when I just say whatever is on my mind are when I'm with people I know pretty closely, like my cousins.

 

[Generical]

I can relate, although being shy and blush crazily i still often blurted out jokes and quotes because..i guess i thought it was funny. Heh and immediately after regretting the attention that came with it, if the teacher or whoever was the authority figure talked back i would most likely forget my name and stare blankly. Like Scrabbl said i assume it's just a normal response when you don't say much but do want to fit in, you can brake your barriers - for a bit, doesn't always work though..