I like someone but will it work

[Falkor]

Hello there,

I like someone who lives in another country. Miles away.
We got to know each other online, and we both have SA.
She's very lovely and our personalities match, we talk everyday on the chat.
Yesterday I called her for the first time, and we were both extremely nervous but we did laugh, we talked and enjoyed our conversation. We did pretty well.
But how realistic is it, that such a long distance would work out?
She likes to meet me and I would like to meet her.
We need to do a flight of 13hours.
We just both send a christmas present and a card out to each other.
I really really like her.

Oh we did have some silences when i called, is that bad? All though we did ask each other lots of questions and we laughed. We both were so shy.

What do you think, is this realistic or would I get hurt?

 

[Odo]

A 13 hour flight is going to be extremely expensive, and if it doesn't work out or if it's a scam, then you're either going to be stuck there for a week or so or you'll have to pay to change your flight date. It can really add up. And that's assuming it's not some sort of scam.

I don't know how long you've been talking to this person but I definitely would be a lot more cautious about something like this than if you had actually met in person... I would insist on a face-to-face thing over Skype or maybe you could meet each other somewhere between your two countries.

 

[Froggy246]

I have been witness to a romance happening on a forum where one person was in Australia and the other in the UK so the flight is even longer! I knew the person in the UK (from childhood) and I was also a member on that forum. To be honest I had my doubts that it would work, I mean surely it's not possible to fall for someone without meeting them in person. However they met and began a relationship instantly, I think the Aussy person stayed in the UK for as long as his Visa would allow and then they both went back to Aus for as long as her Visa would allow. They've broken up now I think, still good mates I imagine, but just goes to show sometimes it can work out.
A few more telephone calls, and as Odo said skype wouldn't hurt though

 

[Bronson99]

I know someone who claims to have gone from Singapore to the United States twice for a guy she liked.... imagine that, eh? She stayed a month each time. Only the second time it was an absolute disaster, she told me he abused her, and then the fighting continued over the Net when she went home, leading to severe emotional problems for her that lasted for years. The whole story to me seems far-fetched but she's such a loyal and honest person, I can only conclude that it has to be true. She says she is "unable" to date anyone from her own country. Now she recently traveled to England for another guy, don't know how it went though.

Well anyway, here's what I think:

1) preferably meet someone from your own country
2) know and I mean *really* know who you're going to meet, seeing them on Skype or cam is 100% necessary esp. if you're traveling far to meet them
3) maintain healthy skepticism, and I can't stress this enough.

 

[Capsaicin]

I think it depends on how you both feel about a lack of physical contact and how able you both are to visit in the future or move to be together. I know of many couples who started out long-distance and are now together offline - even married - but it's not good for someone who needs a lot of time together in person and either can't afford to make regular trips or who can't see a future in which they might be together offline.

 

[Meggy0001]

I think it can work. I know a girl who dated this guy for 2 and a half years before they met
When they did meet it went really well and they are still together, I think its 5 years now and he now lives down here.
They didn't live in different countries though, they where about 7 hour car ride from each other. They would stay at each others place around a week at a time
But yeah definitely speak over Skype or something though.
I don't think silences are bad at all especially since it was the first time

 

[Falkor]

Thanks everybody for your replies.
I can see the negative aspects, what y'all are saying. There have been examples of people meeting someone they only known through the internet and it turned out to be a complete disaster.

But also the latest poster wrote about a succes story, even marriage. whoa.

I want to say that this girl i like, wants to take it slow, she wants to Skype to get to know each other and no pressure. So I think she is a good person with good intentions and no harm. And she wants to take it slow. I think that's very good, and I like it this way. So I hope it will turn out to be that we ever become a couple because she seems an angel in my eyes, a loving character and a very good soul. I hope we'd meet.

Thanks for all your replies again, and I will see what happens and as I can read 50 percent of you guys say it ain't work and the other precent says it can turn out great. Hopefully it will.