I have no friends

PhobiaTired

PhobiaTired

Active member
Social anxiety has affected me in different ways but the worst has to be in being able to make friends. I don't have any friends right now, yea I hang out once in a full moon with a few 'acquaintances' but there is no one I can talk to about good/bad things in my life. I hate it! Since I was little I have had a hard time talking to people. In elementary school, I had no friends, whose houses I went over to, just a few classmates that I would talk to during school. Middle school was ok for me. I met a few introverts like myself that I hung out with in school and once in a while outside of school. But after those 2 years in middle school came high school and most of them went to different schools. I didn't go to the one I was suppose to go to (Because my overprotective mother thought it was a bad high school and made me apply to another smaller one) and was accepted to a diff one for "gifted" students. I made no friends there. I would go to school and then home. Never had a bf, friend, nothing. Senior year we moved houses and I went to a different high school. That was a bad year. During lunch, I would go to the bathroom, after eating, and sit in the stall waiting for it to be time to go back to class.

I've always hated this loneliness feeling :( I want to get ideas on how to make friends if anyone can help me!!?!
 
Diend

Diend

Well-known member
The more time you spend with someone, the easier it is to talk about deeper things. It helps if both of you have a lot in common.
 
M

Meggy0001

Well-known member
This is so me, I feel exactly the same way

I cant really give you advice because I am still trying to work out how to make friends myself. But yeah like someone said about the more time you spend with someone the more comfortable you get with them and the more things you have to talk about because you know people and things you can both relate to I suppose. The problem is no one ever stays around long enough for me to open up fully :(
 
DepravedFurball

DepravedFurball

Well-known member
Well, I suppose it doesn't really have to be said that the easiest time to make lasting friends is during your school-years. Being forced together in intimate proximity, and experiencing the same trials and tribulations seems to be a great recipe...


After highschool/college/uni, though, things change drastically. The amount of people that you'll meet dwindles steadily, and you've got to put all that much more effort into finding even one thing that you'd have in common with someone else...


Really... I've got no advice for you, since I'm in the same boat. And I suppose I've stopped trying. For the most-part, though. I'm kinda thinking that, as long as I can find one person that can fit in a best-friend/lover role, then I'd be beyond happy... problem is finding them...

Gotta say... dood said his dog had to remind him to take his meds? That gave me a really good laugh, so thanks for that.

^^
 
PhobiaTired

PhobiaTired

Active member
DepravedFurball said:
Well, I suppose it doesn't really have to be said that the easiest time to make lasting friends is during your school-years. Being forced together in intimate proximity, and experiencing the same trials and tribulations seems to be a great recipe...


After highschool/college/uni, though, things change drastically. The amount of people that you'll meet dwindles steadily, and you've got to put all that much more effort into finding even one thing that you'd have in common with someone else...


Really... I've got no advice for you, since I'm in the same boat. And I suppose I've stopped trying. For the most-part, though. I'm kinda thinking that, as long as I can find one person that can fit in a best-friend/lover role, then I'd be beyond happy... problem is finding them...

Gotta say... dood said his dog had to remind him to take his meds? That gave me a really good laugh, so thanks for that.

^^
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Yea that is true and then in college everyone seems to have their group of friends established and not want to make any new friends. Hopefully you find that person you are searching for! :)
 
megalon

megalon

Well-known member
Can't say I have any advice, but I relate to everything that's been said. I've had friendly acquaintances at best, never any real friends. It seems anyone who comes close to fitting that description, I've met in situations where we are forced to be in close proximity, either school or work. Coworkers invite me out a couple times a year. I've never had anyone I could "hang out" with. People say to find others with common interests, but I don't think that would even work for me. It just takes me way too long to open up to people. I'm horrible with first impressions. People see no reason to invest the time to get to know me, and I don't blame them.
 
PhobiaTired

PhobiaTired

Active member
megalon said:
Can't say I have any advice, but I relate to everything that's been said. I've had friendly acquaintances at best, never any real friends. It seems anyone who comes close to fitting that description, I've met in situations where we are forced to be in close proximity, either school or work. Coworkers invite me out a couple times a year. I've never had anyone I could "hang out" with. People say to find others with common interests, but I don't think that would even work for me. It just takes me way too long to open up to people. I'm horrible with first impressions. People see no reason to invest the time to get to know me, and I don't blame them.
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Yes! It is hard to find others with similar interests because I cant seem to open up to people either :sad: Also not good with first impressions I either stutter or blush or both lol
 
Marc7

Marc7

Well-known member
Me neither I don't have any real life friends either :sad:.I don't how to make friends with people but I do know how to small talk but even that I get to anxious to do that as well.
 
Flanscho

Flanscho

Well-known member
- get a hobby that can be shared with others
- search for groups of people in your area having the same hobby
- meet them
- you are now in contact with people who have some things in common with you
- get to know them
- congratulations: you made new friends
 
Odo

Odo

Banned
I watched your video and I was kind of confused as to how you seem to have people who talk to you/buy you gifts, and yet don't have friends.

Maybe you could try reaching out to some of the people you're acquainted with and ask them to do things with you besides the 'regular stuff'... sometimes it's not so much about finding someone who is exactly like you as it is about building bridges and finding things to do with other people.
 
R

ReclusiveGirl22

Member
I'm in the same boat. 22 years old and I haven't had a friend since I was about 16.

I often enjoy my own company, but there are times when I wish I had at least one person to chat to or hang out with.

I just don't know how to communicate with people... not that there is anyone around anyway.
 
I

ImNotMyIllness

Well-known member
PhobiaTired said:
I also thought about this topic because I recently uploaded a vid to my youtube channel if anyone wants to watch since I go more in depth on the topic...

Why I have no friends - YouTube
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I forgot to add one thing about the video. I understand that the SA meetup didn't work out being that some of the people their were older and you found some of the others weird. But, if there are some areas where you are more advance than they are, it's a good opportunity for you to help others.....which in turn will help you.
Personally, I am trying not to focus on what others think of me. I'm just trying to be the best person that I can and help others on the way.
 
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