i get offended too easily

[invisiblez]

how can i stop getting offended this easy?
i know everybody has their own thoughts and feelings.
i always get mad when people dont understand me and other stuff...
how should i keep calm?::

 

[GloomySunday]

I get upset by the slightest thing. I do sympathise.

Whilst I can't help how I feel, I can help how I act.

Even if something (for example, something someone has said) has really got to me, I don't show it. I try to keep my dignity as best as I can. I recognise my hypersensitivity as a failing on my part.

The old saying, "Least said, soon mended" often applies. I would generally avoid the person who upset me and get on with my own business. There's no real point in having it out with them, as it's often a case of me making a mountain out of a molehill. If I say nothing, then I've nothing to feel bad about later on if I run into that person again. How they made me feel would remain private with me. This is particularly useful advice if you work or interact with the person in question on a regular basis.

The pain soon passes and life goes on.

But, if it was something really important, then that's another matter...

 

[bitingthepea]

ah same here
even if i say hi and someone says hi back ill observe how they sed hi, like did they really mean it ? lol silly i know

im currently trying the elastic band technique, you wear a band round ur wrist n if a negative thought pops to mind snap the band and divert into a positive thought.

gd luck x

 

[invisiblez]

but the thing is... i noticed that if its a really sensitive matter to me,
i will give you an example. something that always gets to me real bad. when people ask me where i am from, i tell them..and they're like wow i never seen anyone from your country with brown eyes, i thought they all have blue eyes. they i get angry and im like umm no its like saying all italians have blue eyes or all scottish have brown eyes. im really sensitive when it comes to my country, i dont know why.. my country is tiny, u dont easily meet people from my country in america, so when they see me, they even say it themselves...they say..they never met a person from my country before, so i feel like i represent my country everywhere i go... they only think they know me and my country from movies and stereotypes. i wanna scream to them that we are a cacausian people too and we are in europe off course we can have any eye and hair color! so i have to wear brown contact lenses and color my hair brown to show people that we have all kinds of people.......i know its silly.. i dont know why i care.. i just do..

 

[Apotheosis]

ah same here
even if i say hi and someone says hi back ill observe how they sed hi, like did they really mean it ? lol silly i know

im currently trying the elastic band technique, you wear a band round ur wrist n if a negative thought pops to mind snap the band and divert into a positive thought.

gd luck x

Talk about avoidance training. My arm would be solid red by the end of the day.

 

[invisiblez]

@ bitingthepea OMG thats so F cool DDDDD i wanna try the elastic band technique!!! very clever thx for sharing

 

[DarkPhoenix]

For your own mental being, try not to hold grudges against people that misunderstand you. Instead take a second to think about what they said, was it aimed directly at you? is it possible that you have misunderstood what they were saying? are you jumping to conclusions? could they just be having a bad day? try to talk over the issue in a calm manner, try to educate the person if you feel they are misunderstanding you. Chances are they will feel silly for their ignorance.

 

[luckycharms]

I know what you mean about being offended easily, I'm the same. Here is one thing I have learned... I work with the public a lot and there are a lot of people out there who don't know how to censor themselves. They truly honestly don't know that what they just said is inappropriate. My mom is one of these people. She will say things to people sometimes that I have to pick my jaw off the floor. When I later confront her in private and tell her that what she said wasn't nice she has absolutely no clue what I'm talking about. She truly doesn't get it! So when I cross these people in my life, I just remind myself that THEY are the ones missing a sensitivity chip.

As far as your heritage and country, I think you are just running into people who may be curious or just don't understand. They may be even trying to have small talk with you.

 

[Shant]

I freaking hate this. It's why I'm so avoidant; I can't ever take any insult from anyone. The only way to avoid this is to be in denial - "they're not hurting/insult me, they're just joking". If I ever acknowledge it when someone hurts or insults me, I just can't handle it. In some cases I'm on the verge of tears. In others I'm just completely caught off guard, and stunned.

I hate that I'm a guy and I get like this. That's even worse. At least society stereotypes some women to be this way. Society would just call me a "fag" or a "pussy" or something, in response to this emotional response of mine, which only really makes things worse.

In perspective, it's no wonder I have an obsessive fear of being insulted/hurt. >.>

 

[popolala]

thinking positive!! which we all know!
Its just the matter of going with the plan!

“Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.”

its true!

sometime things can be offensive, so its okay to feel offended.
but some things can turn into positive if you dont return evil for evil..
like say, if someone a cashier was rude, you can make it your buisness to be kind, saying please, thank you.
because then at the end you are the better person and you should feel proud. and i will be proud of you too.

what i try to tell myself is, to not let other people who doesnt care about me have control over my emotion.
because if you do, then they have the power over you. so dont let that happen.