I feel dead...

[AgentR]

My name's Remus and I'm a 15 year old student. It all started when I moved from primary to secondary school (Age 11). I was in art and a bunch of bullies send me lots of verbal abuse. I walked out crying. Since then lots more indicents have happen, too many to mention but one included my only best friend in the world treating me like scum and going off to with troublemakers. I knew him since nursery and was shocked when he did that to me. I hit puberty which made me really tall, I'm 6'1 now and still growing! I have a couple of friends who hang out with this big group. I hang around with them but I'm a outcast, always on the side, never talking. I'm probably the most shy male student in my entire year. I'm quiet and always get on get on my work which gives me a nerdy type of look. But I'm not like that. The real me is cheeky, funny, happy and hates work. The side which only my family sees. Nowadays, I get very little verbal abuse but every tiny bit still is like a dagger to my confidence. I feel dead on the inside and the only way I can escape it is through my daydreams. I'm sick of being the invisible guy that just hangs around waiting for abuse. Please, I need your support and advice. If something doesn't change soon, I reckon I'll end up in a mental home or I'll turn into a psychopath and just go in to a vicious killing spree. :twisted:

 

[sidney]

why dont u try to talk more and be the cheeky, happy person u are wit ur family. Wen u wanna say sumfin n ur mind goes STOP just go NO, so what if ppl think its dumb, lots of others in my group hav said dumb stuff and just laughed about it. once that negative thot cums into ur mind just go stop! no it wont be that bad it will be better and see what happens. and this way u'll get attention and wont be invisible gd luck xXxx

 

[kyle]

My name's Remus and I'm a 15 year old student. It all started when I moved from primary to secondary school (Age 11). I was in art and a bunch of bullies send me lots of verbal abuse. I walked out crying. Since then lots more indicents have happen, too many to mention but one included my only best friend in the world treating me like scum and going off to with troublemakers. I knew him since nursery and was shocked when he did that to me. I hit puberty which made me really tall, I'm 6'1 now and still growing! I have a couple of friends who hang out with this big group. I hang around with them but I'm a outcast, always on the side, never talking. I'm probably the most shy male student in my entire year. I'm quiet and always get on get on my work which gives me a nerdy type of look. But I'm not like that. The real me is cheeky, funny, happy and hates work. The side which only my family sees. Nowadays, I get very little verbal abuse but every tiny bit still is like a dagger to my confidence. I feel dead on the inside and the only way I can escape it is through my daydreams. I'm sick of being the invisible guy that just hangs around waiting for abuse. Please, I need your support and advice. If something doesn't change soon, I reckon I'll end up in a mental home or I'll turn into a psychopath and just go in to a vicious killing spree. :twisted:

Bulid yourself up, and go into sports. Possibly Boxing or Martial arts. You need to work out that pent up aggression.

 

[MikeM]

workout( relives anger and stress), get drunk on weekends (you will socialize alot more) and as the guy above me said, when you got something to say, say it. If you got nothing to say, make something random and stupid/funny to say. nothing wrong with being randomly retarded at times

 

[jayo]

Play sports you like or involve yourself in an activity you're interested in.
Trust me - you're 15 - and so many of the kids at your school are as
frightened as you - at least you're facing up to it.

 

[Leopard]

sounds horrible

im really sorry that thats how school is for you.
i hated school when i was there too, but for different reasons.

schoolkids are idiots, you just have to spend alot of time thinking that you are better than them (which im sure you are, you arent the one being spiteful and uncaring, they are) and just envision the end of school when you can move on and socialise with more mature people.

please dont kill anyone if it doesnt get better ill come to your school and knock them out...
x

 

[jshizzle]

uk sucks biotchessss

haha sucks to b u.. i never got picke don too bad..but u sound week man go kill yoself fool

 

[jshizzle]

uk sucks biotchessss

haha sucks to b u.. i never got picke don too bad..but u sound week man go kill yoself fool..jk but still b cool dawg

 

[InDeepshit]

Hey Remus-(i like that name pretty unique)
School is a stressful place - i found i was always on guard and over analysing everyone and hiding to get away from everyone judging me. MAN i hated school. But i didn't form any coping skills because that's all i was concentrating on. So if you can work with the school counsellor they can help you out with changing how you think about 'threatening' situations. This is just to gain a better perspective.. as soon as you stop focusing on how much you don't contribute and shift focus on how much you want to be around people/ want to enjoy life, you'll send out different vibes, people won't push you around and you won't be as sensitive because their actions won't be interpreted from a defensive stance..also you won't restrict yourself and you'll show you'r true personality at school. i'm not sure if my advice is damaging because it might be promoting the self help view that something is wrong with you and needs to be fixed, or that it's completely wrong. Shyness is just a way of thinking differently about the world (i think), a learned habit so there is nothing wrong with seeking a way to change it. Hope my post is abit inspiring.
jshizzle to take your post seriously a person isn't weak because they haven't been equipped with the right tools for dealing with some issues. You might have no problem with this and so you have no idea how this can be an obstacle for someone in their life. You're no stronger just because this isn't an issue for you and you put up a post expressing your lack of empathy.

 

[jshizzle]

dont worry

look. in the grand scheme of thigns who cares about highschool. it can b socially scarring howver u just have to so.. so i was a little unpopuler i have a fine lifwe now.. if u let them get to u.. u lost.. no matter how ahrd that mite b.. tell a etacher.. if thigns suck hat mauch it cant get much worse.. ive have told on 1 or 2 people throught my years and it never ended up being to bad.. and i went to one of the harshest schools in the world.. exeter academy in mass,, usa