I dont like attracting attention

[HexNoir]

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I mean, personally I think I'm atrocious looking but I've only ever gotten positive remarks. I'm just too damn afraid to talk about myself or just to talk freely on a personal level. I know that if I could just open up, my life would be at least better than it is now. But usually I just end up walking away if somebody does happen to say something positive to me due to the fact that my self esteem has hit rock bottom levels. It sucks ass, I'll tell you that much. Plus, I still think I'm butt ugly so nothing changes.

 

[osse]

I'm just too damn afraid to talk about myself or just to talk freely on a personal level. I know that if I could just open up, my life would be at least better than it is now.

Same here, but without positive remarks (negative instead, but I don't mind them). But I know very shy people who have managed to get a satisfying life, with friends, a partner... so there is hope. Now, as I have told, I try to be more simple-minded and I feel less pressured.

 

[IknowIhaveSP]

I hope so. Having SP is really difficult. Why do I care it so much? I have no clue. Who cares if they follow me or not. I'm really wondering the reason of having this weird logic which I also know that abnormal. It's same for all of us I see. We know it's wrong to think like that but we can't change the way we think and keep on with escaping, fearing, getting away from people.

 

[Argamemnon]

Whenever I meet with a new guy at the office, they tell me I noticed you before! But I never notice any of them. One of those hitting on me told me the same today. I just told him I dont want to be noticed and he said not possible, you're beautiful but I dont want to be noticed and followed

Dear friend,

There is just one thing I don't understand; if some girl told me I'm handsome, I would be happy rather than sad. Do you hate yourself so much that you don't want people to tell you that you're beautiful - even though you know it's true?

 

[lilcharlie]

I can relate to what those girls are talking about in this thread. I think I have a tinge of social anxiety. But probably not as bad as my immediate family; they have "hard core SA."

Most of my posts are in regard to looks, boys, and socializing with people. This sounds utterly stupid and this is the only forum where girls in my situation will understand but I think I'm going coo-coo. I am really trying hard to especially avoid guys at work. Some guys at work just creep me out and have "stalkerish" tendencies towards me. Some guys outside of work have stalkerish tendencies too.

This is gonna sound really stupid ok, I really, really, really hate attention but there is not one day I can walk out that door without someone saying something about my looks. I am unsuperficial compared to some people but all I hear all day is looks this looks that. I know people are trying to be nice so I just smile and say thanks. I know I can ugly it down, but I don't feel like it, yet I hate the attention it brings. As I've said in previous posts, I don't dress/look like Pamela Anderson or nothing, more like Reese Witherspoon/ Jennifer Aniston type of style. I don't think I'm all that. I get hit on by a lot of old men too, like they know no shame. Girls aren't very receptive to me, guy friends want more, people think I slut around and party all the time, people talk about my looks. I take different routes at work to avoid guys, people stalk me, I hate eating lunch with guys at work because they all think I'm a slut. I have really went into seclusion. I just like sitting at home so that no one bothers me.

I try to ignore this but sometimes it just comes back, and gets to me. A couple reasons this bothers me so much is because I have some SA, I am so not a "looks" type of person, I have other interests, I am very unsuperficial compared to some people, but I just get so many looks type of comments and I can tell the way people interact and treat me because of looks; it just starts really getting to me. I start to get anxiety when guys at work talk to me. I can't go to work without some guys going, "Ooh baby, etc." I've seriously come to avoid some people, and that's not even really my style, but I have to act this way for my sanity. I can make myself look real ugly, but I just don't feel like doing that all the time. There was a time I really uglied it down and people couldn't stop talking about me, so I hated that attention too. I just hate attention period. I don't like spending time on this type stuff but it gets to me. I wish everyone would just leave me alone and never talk about me, and never talk about how I look ever again.

 

[sabbath9]

I wish everyone would just leave me alone and never talk about me, and never talk about how I look ever again.

be careful what you wish for... good looks don't last forever

 

[Andrew]

I know what it is like - it is the same for guys. I am considered good-looking and for my entire life I have been perceived as a threat by other guys and sometimes girls. They think I am some kind of indestructible force that they must beat down at every opportunity. It feels like I am supposed to be the lone wolf and they are the group that binds together to overcome their supposed inferiority. They seem to think that they are not good enough for me and that I would not consider hanging out with them.

Let me give a dose of reality to you though - you can't just go out with out-going, perfect guys and expect that they will not leave you. If you are quiet and have issues, you have to accept this and maybe find somebody else who has similar issues. You will have to deal with their issues just as they will have to deal with your issues. It is not a one-way street. You can't just take whoever you want and complain that they don't like you in the end.

 

[TAMPA-BAY]

A big cause of this is the movie industry. We are brain washed from since we are kids that you mush marry the prettest or be the prettest. We are thaught that when choseing the best judge is looks so its no wonder that you members who are hotties get so much attention. People were just thought that you are the ultament trophy.

 

[Angie973]

gaahhh this thread makes me feel ugly

 

[Psychedelicious]

Yeah seriously, me too. I know this thread is like really really old, but whoever started it, I want to slap them.

 

[Havocan]

I know what it is like - it is the same for guys. I am considered good-looking and for my entire life I have been perceived as a threat by other guys and sometimes girls.

Sounds like you come from a gay society, when thinking of the blokes.

 

[mrb]

yeah i do know what your talking about ... but first you really need to stop worring about what other people are thinking about you .. hey your good looking well thats good , the next thing is try not to worry about it , you dont have to talk to people if you dont want to , hey i dont , dont be rude just say oi im busy lol does your nut in dont it , you have to learn to like your self , how UMMM well diff things for diff people , confidence can be gained , but only you can do it , my confidence is gained cos i weightlift , run ect takes the stress out of me , find your stress buster , and learn to like yourself lol , from there it gets better gazza