I am intimidated by PARTY/CLUBBER PEOPLE!!

[recluse]

It's true what Johno is saying; Have you noticed that people out clubbing are either drunk o'r wasted on pills?....It take more guts to be sober.

 

[ktea]

I really know how you feel. I've never been to a club, I'm only 15, lol. But I do avoid parties. I'm so depressed. I don't know what to do with my life. I have no friends at all. no one to talk to.. I really want to have friends but I'm so afraid and anxious. I don't even know why I'm this way. Was I born this way? Is this some kind of cruel and unusual punishment?? Why am I like this when everyone else in my family isn't?

 

[Johno]

This is for you ktea. I know how you feel. Many of us do. Some of us have been there. My suggestion to you would be as follows. Research your issues on the internet. Get some idea of what you are struggling with. One would assume social anxiety. If so it's not that bad. You just need to take the next step. That usually involves contacting a support group or talking to your doctor (sometimes, demanding that he listens). If he doesn't listen there is usually a number you can ring for help. The phone book is more than an arm rest. I know how scary it is. It's, let be frank terrifying. I’ve been there. It's like this massive shell you are in and you just can't break out of it. I totally suggest being stubborn and not going to school or just telling someone like your mother, principal, brother, father, neighbour, priest, sister, doctor, school counselor, just some one who will act on you behalf.

All the best

 

[ghost_train]

I know exactly what you mean about this 'type' of person. I find them much easier to be around in small groups or on a one to one basis. They are the type of people that seem to have mastered small talk and have a limitless conversation-making ability, which is highly beneficial as I seem to be able to fine actively engaging in pretty much any conversation so long as the topic is handed to me on a plate.

Though I'm sure it's not true, I have often thought that having this small-talk-making ability would 'complete' me and allow me to live the kind of life that I strive for.

 

[Broken_Memory]

OH my gosh, YES!! I realized that today in English class. There's people in the class that talk about going clubbing (the teacher- who is really outgoing even talks about it with them. what is the world coming to). I feel like I'm in a totally different world from them. I can't imagine being in a place where its all about meeting people because you're busy exposing yourself in flashy outfits. I know there's more to it than that, but in any case, it would be a nightmare going clubbing!

I find I relate so much more to people that have some sort of conflict in life, something that's holding them back socially. People who go clubbing seem to be so free. I know they have other problems of their own, but I always feel like they make life look so easy. It terrifies me, the thought of going somewhere for the very purpose of meeting new people and socializing.

Stressball, I always feel like I have nothing new to say to certain people either. I feel like everyone else is an expert on certain topics and that they have so much to say and that their lives are so darn free.

In my English class today (today was my second day of class) I was speaking with the boy beside me and I felt at ease with him (compared to how I feel with most new people anyway) because he's had issues - like me- in high school too (not social phobia though as far as I know). There's just so many people in the class I observe and I think "oh my god, I'd never be able to talk with them".

 

[Johno]

Totally not sure how to respond to that......................But, I will give it my best. Perhaps one should relax and then go to sleep. Well it has worked for others.........

 

[aboobooboobooo]

Totally not sure how to respond to that......................But, I will give it my best. Perhaps one should relax and then go to sleep. Well it has worked for others.........

I wish I could sleep forever, it would make it easier to deal whit SA

 

[silverwolf]

People in clubs are usually low quality in my opinion. I don't really like these type of people. The guys in clubs are pretty scared in my opinion. Probably not to the extent of a social phobic. But usually they need to get really drunk to talk to other people. Icarus if you live in England I'd be happy to hang out at a club with you and I could show u a few tricks to help u start building up ur social skills and talking to strangers. I go to clubs by myself about 2 or 3 times per week to build my character and it still makes me nervous.

 

[Jay-T]

Yea I hear that. My roommate is like that, confident, outgoing. I've lived with him for nine months and am still not comfortable talking to him. I don't know what it is. He's a nice guy and I'll still live here with for a while, I'm just not comfortable with talking to him.

I'll go to bars/clubs a lot, usually with the same small group of people. The few times I've gone by myself I only had a good time if I ran into someone I knew, which was rare, or if I could get myself onto a pool table. All the girls wanna be on the team with the guy who doesn't lose. Even then I never really met anyone that way since I was still so cold and distant.