How often do you go out?

[Rainman]

How often do you go out, who do you go with and how do you cope in social places, how do you feel, like pubs, clubs, parties etc?

I myself go out rarely, so everytime I go into a busy pub, club or party, I feel like I am visiting from another word. It actually leaves me stunned and dazed to see all these people at once, hundreds of different conversations going off at the same time in all directions, watching people dance around. It's feels so unreal

 

[Heartbeat]

Ditto. I almost never go out now - I prefer being at home. Clubs, smoking, noise...yuk!

 

[r0ck0ut04]

I know what you mean Rainman when I go out in social situations I feel like a vegetable theres to much going on that im not used to. It almost feels like im not there its weird.

 

[Rainman]

Ditto. I almost never go out now - I prefer being at home. Clubs, smoking, noise...yuk!

Yeah, the noise and smoke levels are unbearable, yet this is the real social life of regular people. It really dawns on me when I go out at night, to see that this is when the all the people meet up, date, drink, dance and basically have a hell of a time. This is where more and more friends are made. All this happens, while either I am at home reading a book, watching television or sleeping.

 

[Rainman]

know what you mean Rainman when I go out in social situations I feel like a vegetable theres to much going on that im not used to. It almost feels like im not there its weird.

Yeah, that's the word, vegetable. I can totally relate to the feeling of not being there. It feels very awkward, and it shows to others or the group you came in with, and they also feel awkward. Depending on who you're with, it's only a matter of time until they turn to you and say "You're the weakest link, goodbye"

I actually don't like the excessive noise and smoke and the out of control hedonism, but that sort of leaves us with a catch 22. Most of us here don't have many friends, and most people meet up in these places. So to make friends, we need to go to these places.

The other catch 22 is, to go to these places, we need friends in the first place, or we would be sitting/standing alone. I am often very embarassed when I am asked by people "What are you doing on your weekend" I don't do anyting at all

 

[Scottish_Player]

I have only recently started going out in my life (iam 24) once was last month and the other was tonight, both times have been to a work mates house for a poker night with 6 other people, to be honest i really have to force myself to go but i enjoy it in the end, because i know if i dont start going out and trying to build some kind of social cirle for myself then iam pretty much gonna be alone all my life.

I was driving home tonight from his and it felt good to be driving back from somewhere that actually mattered to me rather than just driving home from a 2 hour lonsome drive.

 

[maggie]

I have only recently started going out in my life (iam 24) once was last month and the other was tonight, both times have been to a work mates house for a poker night with 6 other people, to be honest i really have to force myself to go but i enjoy it in the end, because i know if i dont start going out and trying to build some kind of social cirle for myself then iam pretty much gonna be alone all my life.

I was driving home tonight from his and it felt good to be driving back from somewhere that actually mattered to me rather than just driving home from a 2 hour lonsome drive.

that's cool Scottish.......how did poker game go? :wink:

 

[LittleMissScareAll]

I've never been to any parties or clubs or any crap like that. The only time I go out(except to go to work) is to go see a movie or go shopping with my mom or something.

 

[Gloomy]

I went many months without leaving the house just last year. I am doing better now. I get out at least once a week. Starting next week maybe once everyday! I doubt I will stick to that though.

I've never been to a party. I went to a club once and had a great time but I don't have anybody to go with now.

 

[Falcon]

I went many months without leaving the house just last year. I am doing better now. I get out at least once a week. Starting next week maybe once everyday! I doubt I will stick to that though.

I've never been to a party. I went to a club once and had a great time but I don't have anybody to go with now.

Hey Gloomy! It takes a lot of courage, but you can go to a club alone, and have fun!

 

[RedFacedBandit]

when i was bad i didnt go out to a bar/club for like 2-3 months. but when i did it was real weird. i was kinda dizzy, and when i talked my mouth trembeled like i was a nervous wreck, but i wasnt really nervous at all. it was weird. but after a few hours went by i was gettin back into the groove and i felt good when i went home and got the best night sleep in a long time.

 

[scatmantom]

I go out to pubs for football a few times a week, sometimes go to clubs and often go to friends houses for parties/watchin movies. I dont like to go places for the 1st time, but once i have been a few tiems it becomes 2nd nature to me.



Problem is first time I go somewhere there is always a problem

 

[triceratops]

How often do you go out, who do you go with and how do you cope in social places, how do you feel, like pubs, clubs, parties etc?

I myself go out rarely, so everytime I go into a busy pub, club or party, I feel like I am visiting from another word. It actually leaves me stunned and dazed to see all these people at once, hundreds of different conversations going off at the same time in all directions, watching people dance around. It's feels so unreal

I used to feel like that even used to be terrified about going to the bar and ordering a drink but that was when i was 16 luckily my mates used to force me to go out and gradually I got used to it so I have no problem with bars, clubs or partys' now its just a case of getting used to it as u mentioned u rarely go out.

Its not just because u have sa either I had a mate who had the same problem I used to try and drag him out all the time to try and show him what he missing but he always felt uncomftable in them situations but nows he used to it. Hes a big party animal just like me now

 

[IceLad]

The other catch 22 is, to go to these places, we need friends in the first place, or we would be sitting/standing alone. I am often very embarassed when I am asked by people "What are you doing on your weekend" I don't do anyting at all

Ditto, Rainman.

I rarely go out, and there is no way that I would venture into a pub or club on my own. The trouble is, is that I often feel as if I'm missing out on life by not going out and doing these things.

 

[newshyguy]

??

what in the world is a Pub?? i never heard that word before, is that similar to a bar?

- i dont go out either , saturdays and friday nights , how wack is that??
i stay at my dorm or my house, the last time i got out was when i was in high school, i went to a club (i only been in a club at night 3times) and it was so crowded and it was so new to me, that i didnt go again, damn

im in college and like i know people get all dressed up to go to parties, and just i wish i could go in one of them, be myself and have fun.

 

[Septor]

I really don't go anywhere other then the store but I try to go each day so I get more use to going out side.I really wish I could go out clubbing or to some other social activity.Like other people have said it feel like i'm missing out on life.

 

[the_secret_me]

i love to go out...well i like the idea of it anyway. i can go somewhere like the movies or shopping with freinds or whatever and im fine. but if i go somewher in a large group of people that i dont know very well i have trouble. i freeze up and sit there feeling awkward and uncomfortable. its a bit scary.
im not old enough to go to clubs and i have only been to a couple of parties....one was on the weekend...i felt really awkward at first and it only got better when i started to drink. i think maybe it was hard for me cos im not usually invited to parties and so i dont really know how i should act and stuff. like...i felt pressure on myself to "party" and have a good time. it just made me freeze up and i couldnt think of things to say to people.
well these days i pretty much try to do something once a week...if im not busy with school or working etc.
usually its just like going to the movies or shopping or something.

 

[lily]

edit

 

[Richey]

yeah its definately challenging to walk into these places, its a mirage of awkwardness and its apparent the one of the reasons sa people are reluctant to frequent a pub or bar is because of this forced nature of it, i know that many people would give this as a reason for being unhappy, that you dont go out "to the pub for a drink and a dance or a snog", but one thing you have to remember is that these extroverted people(by the way introverted people do as well, i know, it depends on comfort levels) who attend the clubs every week are no better than you at all, and in fact the statistics of introverts/extroverts are around the 50/50 mark, i challenge everyone here to go to localised clubs/bars/pub, whatever on your own or with friends and order a drink and just focus on the fact that really you are the same person as you are at home with your family and that potentially there is a good chance that you will meet someone on your level, and not going to these clubs doesnt make you a bad person at all, its just a recreation and if you dont drink then its kind of pointless anyways, am i wrong? you can meet people anywhere its just that the "pub" is the socially acceptable way of doing it in most peoples eyes, but it doesn't mean that its the right way, dont feel that you have to buckle under the pressure of other peoples expectations of yourself, i asked my sister about clubbing the other night and i asked her what is it that makes it such a "must do" action, she said that she has changed her tune and that she prefers having friends over or just visiting an art gallery, i was "shocked" she went on to say that she didnt like the music and that she only went because all her other friends were there but now she's seeking other interests and has a different attitude to it,

TBC, i have to go but ill add to this later on

 

[Forsaken]

I only go to work. In my free time, I pretty much just chat online. My only social life is online. lol