Several years ago I got a job in retail. I was so desperate for a job that I took it without really thinking about how it was going to bring out my SP. My FIRST day, they had me running the cash register by myself. It was at a pet store, so I figured I would get some kind of training in animals or be filling out paperwork. Nope. I was indescribably terrified. I'd never worked a register before. I was afraid I would give back incorrect change or muff something up. I'm not gonna lie, I was scared every time I had to check someone out. But three things saved me. One, I wasn't working at Walmart or any place where it is busy ALL the time. Two, I interacted with the customers. Talking to them calmed me down. It gave me something else to focus on; I find when I multitask that I'm less nervous about any one aspect of the multitasking. Three, I would say about 50 - 60% of transactions are with check/credit/debit. Another 10% are people who pay with exact change, so the percentage of transactions dealing with cash back isn't that big.
I ended up staying at that job for almost 3 years, even being promoted to a managerial position. It wasn't an ideal job, mostly because I had to talk to people all the time about their dog's bowel movements or the mating rituals of red blood cichlids or why hamsters are the spawn of Satan himself. And my boss was an absolute pill. But, big BUT, I actually became comfortable with it all. Well, as comfortable as someone with SP can be in a retail job. I think it comes down to two things. The first being that it is just going to take experience for you to get comfortable. Having a job is never going to feel less scary unless you actually have experience in having one. My dread over getting my first job was probably very similar to what you are feeling now. I started with something simple and SP friendly - dishwasher at a nursing home. But now that I've had that experience, I do have some faith and confidence in my ability to have and hold a job. I'm currently on the job hunt and scared, but I know that I can do it. I just need to find a job within my limits. The second thing is actually the customers. They were a perfect distraction for my anxiety. Yes, there are the select few who are mean and most are indifferent at best. But the ones that are talkative and polite and kind, even when you want nothing more than for them to shut their pie holes, they are the ones that actually calmed me. I know it sounds weird, but talking to them opened me up a bit and it gives you something else to focus on other than what you are doing. The best part was that most of the nicer people are regular customers, so you know what they are going to buy and what pets they have and you can strike up a good repore with them. Anyhoo, I just rambled on for way too long. Hopefully even a sliver of this post will help you in some way.
In the interest of full disclosure, I got hired once as a member of the bookkeeping dept or a appliance store. It was 9-5, Monday thru Saturday. I went in on Monday, was taught the ropes and went home. I was tired and scared. I was up all night, my stomach in knots over going back in the morning. I cried half of the night. On my way there in the morning, I realized I was way over my head. I went in, told my boss the truth, and quit after one day. I have never felt that low in my entire life. Not everything goes according to plan. Sometimes things just aren't a good fit. You just need to know your limits, accept them as limits, find something that interests you, and go from there.
I'm going to shut up now.
ETA: That's the most I've talked in a long time!
