grapevine
Well-known member
So my posts are a little too random/complex and long- so I will try to keep things plain and simple : )
Have had a crush on a guy at work for 5-6 months. He invited me to new years- it was just us. Bought my meal and then he drove me around and we joked. Then went back to his place, watched some films- and then slept in different places- not together. There was no romance.
Anyway- what ever he thinks of me- and there have been times when I have purely felt like he likes me and other times when I am not even in his radar. What -ever the case - I feel like my social phobia gets in the way of me being approachable and warm. I hardly ever initiate going up to him or even sitting down with him- or even talking. I need to almost have something to say about work or a prop ( like something to show him that may be funny etc) just to get near him- like I feel so afraid to show any affection to him.
I walk away from him even when I am busy- see I have read stuff about guys who like to chase- or something - and women not to show they like them.. because it puts them off.
Today I really,really wanted to thank him for new years but I freaked out and couldn't. Its like every time we are around each other working or hanging out- I completely loose my true self- like what I want to show and say and all that- I just freeze up and with sp I must seem so cold. And I feel he may be mirroring me!
I want to be able to turn this around. What I want to know is, if I actually just leap into the courage to be different towards him- if I was friendly, touched him a little - like on the arm or something to show him that I am not afraid of him getting close- would that be too much? Initiated going up to him- do you think that would put him off?
I want to do this for me. Because it bugs me.
I mean I am not expecting much- just as a friend is fine- but making these changes- is it a good move? Bty he has schizophrenia and can be completely in his own world at times.
Have had a crush on a guy at work for 5-6 months. He invited me to new years- it was just us. Bought my meal and then he drove me around and we joked. Then went back to his place, watched some films- and then slept in different places- not together. There was no romance.
Anyway- what ever he thinks of me- and there have been times when I have purely felt like he likes me and other times when I am not even in his radar. What -ever the case - I feel like my social phobia gets in the way of me being approachable and warm. I hardly ever initiate going up to him or even sitting down with him- or even talking. I need to almost have something to say about work or a prop ( like something to show him that may be funny etc) just to get near him- like I feel so afraid to show any affection to him.
I walk away from him even when I am busy- see I have read stuff about guys who like to chase- or something - and women not to show they like them.. because it puts them off.
Today I really,really wanted to thank him for new years but I freaked out and couldn't. Its like every time we are around each other working or hanging out- I completely loose my true self- like what I want to show and say and all that- I just freeze up and with sp I must seem so cold. And I feel he may be mirroring me!
I want to be able to turn this around. What I want to know is, if I actually just leap into the courage to be different towards him- if I was friendly, touched him a little - like on the arm or something to show him that I am not afraid of him getting close- would that be too much? Initiated going up to him- do you think that would put him off?
I want to do this for me. Because it bugs me.
I mean I am not expecting much- just as a friend is fine- but making these changes- is it a good move? Bty he has schizophrenia and can be completely in his own world at times.
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