How do I learn social skills?

Toomuchfear

Toomuchfear

Well-known member
I was a socially isolated child- I spoke in funny noises and hid from interaction and people. My relationships with my family were bizarre or strained. Bullied, confused and alone, I spent a lot of time thinking, gradually developing my SA. The lack of social skills and SA is a horrid combination.

No matter how many help books I read, people I practice talking to or social events I force myself into, I am always alone and can't build friendships. People at work have thought I'm sarcastic and weird, my relationships are poisoned with social jealousy and I have difficulty expressing my needs and wants. I can never think of what to say and I have difficulty getting people to enjoy listening to me. I find it so hard to get along with people...and all I really yearn for in life is companionship and acceptance!

So I'm asking you guys...how can I learn social skills...what the lucky majority of this Earth take for granted?

I've worked really hard to lesson my SA symptoms, but how can I learn the art of interaction, conversations and relationships? Like many of you, I hate being lonely

Thanks for reading.
 
Death Rider

Death Rider

Active member
Recently, I learned that you can't do a weeks' worth of work in one try. Also... I believe I am disappointed in social activities, because I have tried being among them, trying really hard to fit in, to understand what is it that makes living fun, but nothing sticks.
Now I am thinking that there might be a similar reason.. that maybe there's still so much experience to be gained, before it becomes pleasureful...
My advice would be just to keep on socializing and your own pace. I suppose it would be most effective to do it with an other SAD person. That's what I will be doing :)
 
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whattodo1

Active member
THERAPY! DO IT!
lol i just started in january and I'm already seeing improvements.. I just hope that I improve more over time because I'm still not happy about my socializing skills atm..
I believe I can get better.
I actually saw this video on this webpage that learning social skills makes your anxiety worse ?? The video was quite boring so I stopped watching after 3 minutes..
 
Kiwong

Kiwong

Well-known member
Practice. I'm starting to learn how to socialise. The more I do it the better I get.
 
Pachito

Pachito

Member
Yeah get some therapy its helping me alot, but I also take Zoloft cuz i used drugs before. I would say my social skills are getting better, however I still have problems talking to girls::eek::
 
D

Duraldo

Well-known member
Practice is the best way. Therapy won't work, honestly go get a prostitute/stripper and talk to her about your problems, way cheaper then a doctor who will try to medicate you. Seriously, you can't "read" to improve social skills, won't work. It takes years of dealing with people in a "healthy" manner to acquire, something we probably missed out on as adolescents, and developed into SA. Learn that people don't really care about you, so what you do really doesn't matter for the majority of people. Getting rejected a billion times helps too. I've come along way from before but I still have issues with anxiety, mainly with school.
 
coyote

coyote

Well-known member
Watch TV

not stuff like CSI or Law & Order - people are not that serious or dramatic in real life

sitcoms are great - the stupider the better - like the Disney channel

just act like those people, and you'll be loved and adored by everyone you meet
 
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