How are you feeling?
- Thread starter Remus
- Start date
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Ah... Ah cannae pit up with this much longer. Am sure I'm gan tae be sectioned under the Mental Health Act afore this year ends. It's quite... No, it's deeply troubling being fully aware of level of physically harm I could inflict upon another person were I to just snap and allow my temper to get the better of me. :kickingmyself: :bat:
Doesnae exactly help that I'm surrounded by a family who stupidly try n' provoke me to that exact sort of violent reaction "...fur a laugh". :veryangry: Nevermind if an incident during my final year of primary school is pretty much etched in my mind. :
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Doesnae exactly help that I'm surrounded by a family who stupidly try n' provoke me to that exact sort of violent reaction "...fur a laugh". :veryangry: Nevermind if an incident during my final year of primary school is pretty much etched in my mind. :
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AtTheGates
Banned
Thanks, Bill!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgzQuE1pR1w
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgzQuE1pR1w
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Okay, I'm seriously worried I'm about to lose my Mum. I'm concerned she's gonnae take her own life. :sad: Earlier this evening she snapped at me that: "Naebuddy helps her, but she used tae it!" Not even my quietly telling her that I help her when asked was enough to make her acknowledge that her statement wus incorrect. :: I'm still lump in the older sisters, who treat Mum like crap. :thumbdown: I mean I'm guilty of doing the same but at least I huv the decency to admit I should've huv react as I did and apologise. My Mum's never got that from either of her daughters.
Not that I'm, by any means, the good son...
Then, just an hour ago, as I told her I'd off to bed once I finish up reinstalling one last program on my eldest sister's boyfriend's laptop, outta the blue my mother goes:
: I'm still lump in the older sisters, who treat Mum like crap. :thumbdown: I mean I'm guilty of doing the same but at least I huv the decency to admit I should've huv react as I did and apologise. My Mum's never got that from either of her daughters. Not that I'm, by any means, the good son...
Then, just an hour ago, as I told her I'd off to bed once I finish up reinstalling one last program on my eldest sister's boyfriend's laptop, outta the blue my mother goes:
"Ah cannae wait I'm deid! Y'know that? At least then, ah'll no huv anyone nagging at me aw the time, I'll be at peace. Ah know how you feel when ye say you feel like killin' yerself" :crying:
theslowesthand
Banned
I feel like i've been universally rejected by all women. :crying:
defiance
Well-known member
Unfortunately, I know what you mean.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
I've been asking myself those same questions, lately. Sadly I'm not hopeful things will change for the better. :sad:
I've tried as well, but, it never seems to be good enough.
Same here. I often wonder why I didn't die at birth, as the doctors expected me to...
theslowesthand
Banned
^ Same here to all of the above :sad:
AtTheGates
Banned
I hate it when when people do something, take no accountability for it , but then call out someone else for doing the SAME exact thing they did. Iv seen that so many times.
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PugofCrydee
You want to know how I got these scars?
Yea people have goldfish memories. About 4 minutes long.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
My mother had an infuriating habit of being like that when I was younger, now my older sister fits that description. :thumbdown:
theslowesthand
Banned
I haven't grown up to be a normal happy personable confident man, so at least something's gone seriously wrong there. :sad:
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Me neither. :sad:
But hey, when yer raised by and grew up around dysfunctional, manipulative, abusive people being personable and confident isn't exactly look upon to fondly. :
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worrywort
Well-known member
Ah man, you worded this so well! I can totally relate to this feeling! It really cuts to the core of me, this feeling that there must be something fundamentally unlovable about me for me to have been single my whole life.
It's a battle I often lose in my brain, because, when I think honestly about it, I really don't think it's true, and yet the feeling is so hard to shake sometimes. I think in truth I'm sure I'm perfectly lovable, with just as much to offer as the next guy, and the main reason I've never had a girlfriend is because I don't socialize much and I've gone my own way in life so I'm a bit unusual in some respects. So I think it's just gonna be a bit harder for me to find someone who genuinely loves me, but I'm sure it's possible, and I think that's the important thing. To never stop believing in your innate lovability. Someone out there loves you. Whether you manage to find them or not is a bonus.
FountainandFairfax
in a VAN down by the RIVER
Broke and ugly, ha ha.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
Numb. Detached. Bored. Miserable. Stressed out. Tense. Suicidal. :sad:
I don't know. :idontknow: Ah don't see the point in living anymore if I'm constantly going to have justify everything I say n' do to my temperamental bitch of a sister and rest o' my family. :kickingmyself: Can't even tell the days apart, lately. Cuz it's just been the same thing day in, day oot... :thumbdown:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysFxrPNjvNA
I don't know. :idontknow: Ah don't see the point in living anymore if I'm constantly going to have justify everything I say n' do to my temperamental bitch of a sister and rest o' my family. :kickingmyself: Can't even tell the days apart, lately. Cuz it's just been the same thing day in, day oot... :thumbdown:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysFxrPNjvNA