feeling that I don't have a personality

thewiz

thewiz

Active member
We obviously have some sort of personality or attributes that set us aside from everyone else but does anyone else feel like they honestly don't have a personality?

I feel that I have no personality, that I don't even make an impression on someone or make them have some sort of connection with them or even hold a conversation of interest with them.

I also feel like I have several different personalities that I use with different people or friends..like I don't use one for everyone..(literally, I will act and talk differently with one person and a few minutes later, be a completely different person just to accommodate the personality of the person I am interacting with)

With some groups I am considered to be center of attention and be funny, talkative, very social and outgoing. But with other groups I turn within and just feel like I have nothing to say and that I don't even belong here or anyone even acknowledges me.

I over analyze every social situation I am in, I worry too much about keeping up a conversation and how I'm viewed by people. It's pretty frustrating and I am up to the point where I just want to talk to people without worrying about my socialness (or lack thereof).

Alot of people have pretty strong characteristics that make them stand out. Me? I feel like I have none. Which makes me want to pick up some sort of interesting hobby that could possibly shape me and give me some sort of characteristic.
 
E

Enialis227

Well-known member
Holy Shit. I didn't know other people felt like that too.
In Jungian terms I have always felt like a collection of Persona that I created for different people and situations, rather than a person who had any "universal" defining characteristics.
I believe that I never got to develop a true individual personality, because I was always so worried about acting in a way that the people that I was with approved of.

Well, forgot to add that this is changing now because of medication. Now I feel that I am free to express my true thoughts as they form with anybody that I am with. It feels like I do have a personality, but that only now is it able to break through the anxiety.
 
Last edited:
philly2bits

philly2bits

Well-known member
I've never thought I had no personality. I do notice I act different around different people though. Mainly though it's whether I am comfortable with the people I'm around or not. I think that has more to do with SA then anything else. I don't feel as though I'm putting on an "act" for some people and not others.
 
lurknomore

lurknomore

1
I feel the same. I know I have a personality, I just think that maybe it hasn't been fully developed. I also act differently around different people, but I don't feel that I'm ever being "fake," as I never do anything that goes against my nature. I guess I'm just more reserved around some people than others, and if I'm not comfortable, I'll show less of what little personality I do have.
 
Shift

Shift

Well-known member
It's weird being online and seeing people who have some of the same feelings and thoughts as I do and can relate to me...

In real life, the people I am around have these great personalities and they are outgoing and sociable and fun to be around.

And then there's me. I think I have no personality and that I'm boring.

But then, I'll be hanging out with my cousin, and I'll be silly and loud and talk a lot. Or with the twins, I am slightly more talkative.
 
Anomaly

Anomaly

Well-known member
Lack of desirable traits as well as the presence of them determines personality as perceived by others. I don't think you can really "lack" a personality, you can simply lack a desirable one.
 
limetree

limetree

Well-known member
Apparently we all have 4-7 sub-personalities, so it's understandable why we may feel anxious about the inconsistency of how the self is expressed. The ego is illusory though so a little adaptive fragmentation is normal. I would rather have an open-ended, partial sense of who I am than have a fixed sense of self which feels unchangeable.
 
BlueDays

BlueDays

1
It was only when I finally found a great therapist that I discovered I actually had the right to build and choose my own personality :eek:
 
C

chained

1
I have that feeling all the time... and I change around other people...but I guess u do have a persona, for example u have ur own beliefs and the way u think..I think we all have one, it's just we are afraid to show it, we don't trust purselves, or we are buliding it, I have many problems with this...:)
see the picture u posted is a reflection of ur personality, what u like... the point is in getting to know ur persona and showing him off...
 
G

Gruntle

New member
Good to see I'm not alone.
I have never found a 'defining' characteristic about myself, and when I got divorced several years ago, I have never been able to work out who I am Or what to do with my life.
I tend to cover ALL situations with humour, and I'm ruddy good at it too.
Just don't know who I really am.
 
thewiz

thewiz

Active member
Interzone said:
I just feel so gray I guess, I mean, my personality has got to be the dullest one out there.
Click to expand...

Absolutely!

The idea here is that we basically over-think the social situations we are in. Each and every one of us has a personality.. I mean, after all, the way you guys type and respond to this thread shows some personality traits. Atleast for myself, even though I am aware of this I still think my personality is dull and motionless. I always wonder what people have to say about me when someone asks if they know me -- as in, what is a very memorable trait that I hold? And sometimes that's what we need to find out to understand we aren't that dull.

Just a question: How many of you feel that, when in a conversation, it seems like YOU are the only one trying to make a convo while the other person seems to be so indifferent at steering the convo?


EDIT: I've been taking a natural muscle relaxant with Valerian Root, and so far.. I feel the best I've ever felt in a long time. Not sure if anyone else has or still does, but share some other things that have helped you!
 
Lea

Lea

Banned
I don't know if I have personality, but I don't really care. I feel as important as plucked chicken in ASDA, sold for 2 pounds, only I am a bit bigger and still alive.
 
T

TheWall

1
I feel the same way, even though it is impossible to not have a personality because it is just a set of characteristics that influence a person's behavior. I think I reject that I have one just because I hate who I am and I would rather not have a personality at all than have a terrible one.
 
G

Gruntle

New member
To answer previous question: yes I feel as if I have to steer the conversation, unfortunately I can never think of anything to say, so generally stand around getting more and more uncomfortable.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top