Fear of public humiliation

[MollyBeGood]

I read somewhere at some point the fear of public humiliation is the core of social anxiety.

 

[worrywort]

I read somewhere at some point the fear of public humiliation is the core of social anxiety.

Yea I've read that too, I think that's certainly true for me. It's the moments when other people laugh at me or hate me because I've done something stupid or worse, shameful, that really hurt the most. And all my weird anti-social behaviours are just an elaborate structure I've built in the hopes of minimizing these moments as much as possible.

 

[very_shy]

Aww you sound like a really sweet person. Maybe they were laughing because they thought it was cute? Though, if you're like me, I'm sure it won't have felt that way to you.

Thanks, well, I had the opposite feeling, it wasn't because it was cute, but because it was weird. At first it was only one cook seeing me, than it called the other one or two, "come here, you must see this", they laughed and remarked "wow did your parents teach you to wash like that" and then the photographer appeared, so my embarrassment became public.

Also I think that my social anxiety issues pretty much started in this grade, before I had no issues, I could read loud, talk, but in this grade it all changed. It was in this grade some of my class also started to make jokes of me in technical lessons, because I was bad in it.

 

[worrywort]

Thanks, well, I had the opposite feeling, it wasn't because it was cute, but because it was weird. At first it was only one cook seeing me, than it called the other one or two, "come here, you must see this", they laughed and remarked "wow did your parents teach you to wash like that" and then the photographer appeared, so my embarrassment became public.

Also I think that my social anxiety issues pretty much started in this grade, before I had no issues, I could read loud, talk, but in this grade it all changed. It was in this grade some of my class also started to make jokes of me in technical lessons, because I was bad in it.

ah I'm sorry to hear that. People can be so cruel sometimes.

 

[theslowesthand]

I read somewhere at some point the fear of public humiliation is the core of social anxiety

Yea I've read that too, I think that's certainly true for me. It's the moments when other people laugh at me or hate me because I've done something stupid or worse, shameful, that really hurt the most. And all my weird anti-social behaviours are just an elaborate structure I've built in the hopes of minimizing these moments as much as possible

I can vouch for that. That's probably the primary reason for my AvPD/SP, and also why i've never even attempted to have a social life. Well, that & the accompanying rage (which for me tends to usually get triggered by the humiliated feelings .. seldom do i get "down on myself" right when it happens, only afterwards)

 

[Sourgirl]

Does anyone have any stories of times when they've been humiliated or ridiculed or bullied in public, that they'd like to share? Or does anyone have any insights about this fear? Like, what's the root cause, and how is the best way to deal with these situations?

I was just cycling to work today and up ahead I noticed these 3 teenage lads on bikes. They were stopped and chatting to each other and had positioned their bikes sideways so that they were blocking the entire path. I could tell they had seen me coming cause they kept looking up at me with smirks on their faces. I moved right to the edge of the path and slowed right down hoping they would move out of the way, but they didn't move an inch. They were all just watching me with smirks on their faces. Then I noticed a gap in the on coming traffic, so I moved onto the road, but even then one guy started reversing his bike back into mine, and he said something like "watch it mate, I'm reversing". Then I could hear them laughing as I cycled off.

This probably sounds like a minor thing to most people, but I've been feeling this profoundly violent sense of rage all evening, and I'm wondering why. I really wanted to confront these kids and beat the hell out of them if I'm honest, but I know that's not the right way to respond. So I'm wondering, what is the right way to respond? And why do I feel so livid? Is it because this kind of public humiliation taps into the deepest, most raw, pains inside of me? Or is it a pride thing maybe?

their just messing with you. you have the right to feel mad and want to meet them up, they should've moved your on a bike. their immature...