Extreme feelings of guilt

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exquisite

Well-known member
Decided to write this, since I'm currently feeling this right now, & I constantly feel this way, too.
It's like guilt, but EXTREME guilt. Like, today, my mom wanted me to go with her when she gets a haircut, but I decided to stay home instead. And she said it's totally fine, but I feel like I completely let her down. I actually feel sick to my stomach with guilt. And now I'm thinking about calling her & going to her job to come with her, since I feel so bad. I keep thinking "I've let her down, I need to go with her. I need to call her & tell her that I wanna go." It's ridiculous! I don't feel this way every single time I say no to someone, but occasionally, when I feel it, I REALLY feel it. Anyone else know what I'm talking about?
 
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exquisite

Well-known member
i dont mean just a guilty feeling. i mean, anxiety brought on by the guilt, stomach aches, headaches, shortness of breath, jumbled thoughts, almost mental pain.
 
Phobologist

Phobologist

1
That's not normal, there is something very wrong with your thinking exquisite that is causing you to experience pathological guilt and associated physical symptoms at highly inappropriate times. You coud resolve this most likely with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. There are a number of techniques at your disposal for identifying and dispeling the ideas which cause this guilt. See my post of CBT.
 
FountainandFairfax

FountainandFairfax

in a VAN down by the RIVER
Why do so many (myself included) SA's constantly feel like they aren't entitled to having an "off day?"

If a normal, non-SA individual is allowed to have moments or days when they can't come through in the clutch, who are we to feel so devastated for experiencing the same feelings when we have even more license to do so?

I suppose it's partly due to our overly-sensitive and anxious natures that we would feel more guilt over not being up-to-task, and that's a shame. I think a lot of us need to learn to lighten-up and treat ourselves like we would if we had a friend in our position.

It's not like you killed someone, your mom loves you regardless, and you'll have better days in the future.
 
CPA23

CPA23

Well-known member
I can relate to that. I have gotten better b/c I used to go days feeling guilty about turning someone down by saying "no". Now, I don't feel as guilty and I don't feel guilty for long. I totally agree with the previous poster in that we are very overly-sensitive and wouldn't want to intentionally hurt someone's feelings. Your mom probably didn't even think twice after you told her no so why should you. Believe me, it is very difficult but you can slowly get better at letting go of the unnecessary guilt.
 
Tempus35

Tempus35

1
I can understand, though it doesn't happen often, I feel guilty over stupid things sometimes. Its that irrational fear that I did something wrong, and that I should feel bad about it.
 
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