eh, eh , eh nothing else I can say..

[Falkor]

Hey people,

Are you also very quiet?
And when you are going to a social situations, are you also afraid of ending up speechless and dunno what to say?
This is my worst scenario in my head, mostly it will end up all different, that I talked alot with a person, But i had some moments in my life .. damn so awkard .
Mostly i dont go to a social place because im afraid ill end up speechless.
This drives me crazyyyyy

Do you also have this fear?

And maybe somebody knows how to think different on this case??
Cause it's really a struggle

 

[Felgen]

This used to happen all the time for me. I have taken a course on social skills and have gotten better regarding this.

 

[userremoved]

Usually I will end up speechless with someone, especially if the say "So tell me a little about yourself". I don't make very good first impressions, but it's easier when I start the conversation myself cause I usually prepare myself better.

 

[illuminationSP]

Yeah, the "tell me a little about yourself" line is absolutely dreadful. When alone, I have millions of thoughts, but when I'm actually in front of somebody, I draw a complete blank.
Suddenly I don't know what my interests are, who I am, my opinions on things, etc.

At a wedding, I was the only one at the table who wasn't talking (just observing, listening) and then someone said, "Scotty is a quiet one, isn't he?" and everyone looked at me and smiled or laughed. Ugh.

 

[johnny 85]

im just back from the supermarket , i went in dere with nothing on my mind, was feeling ok and BAMMMM.... as soon i seen all the people my anxiety hit me. wheni was leaving the woman who served me said "have a good day" and all i did was look at her , wtf is dat all about i cud nt tink of anything to say :: is it gone so bad now that i cant even reply to a simple comment ????? she must of thought i was a right ignorant fecker !!!!!!!!

 

[userremoved]

im just back from the supermarket , i went in dere with nothing on my mind, was feeling ok and BAMMMM.... as soon i seen all the people my anxiety hit me. wheni was leaving the woman who served me said "have a good day" and all i did was look at her , wtf is dat all about i cud nt tink of anything to say :: is it gone so bad now that i cant even reply to a simple comment ????? she must of thought i was a right ignorant fecker !!!!!!!!

Dude, I know that's the worse thing ever. I was at Target shopping and the girl at the cash register was being friendly and telling me jokes for some reason and all I did was give her a blank stare. Then she started looking all sad. When I got into the parking lot I just wanted to throw myself under a car.

 

[mrb]

im just back from the supermarket , i went in dere with nothing on my mind, was feeling ok and BAMMMM.... as soon i seen all the people my anxiety hit me. wheni was leaving the woman who served me said "have a good day" and all i did was look at her , wtf is dat all about i cud nt tink of anything to say :: is it gone so bad now that i cant even reply to a simple comment ????? she must of thought i was a right ignorant fecker !!!!!!!!

lol a woman on a till said that to me a little while ago i said yea thanks i would say the same to you but not much chance of that being stuck behind that till all day ... she amazingly said oh i dont mind i like talking to people behind here ... i just said really well whatever floats your boat i soppose , looking back i soppose i was a bit rude , she didnt say anything just looked at the next customer , elvis then left the building ......

 

[Falkor]

im just back from the supermarket , i went in dere with nothing on my mind, was feeling ok and BAMMMM.... as soon i seen all the people my anxiety hit me. wheni was leaving the woman who served me said "have a good day" and all i did was look at her , wtf is dat all about i cud nt tink of anything to say :: is it gone so bad now that i cant even reply to a simple comment ????? she must of thought i was a right ignorant fecker !!!!!!!!

Ahww I know exactly how this feels!!
You feel like you acted like a freak (I have this so many times XD), but maybe she just thought ur shy!!
Because quiet people seem shy right
But I know it's the most horrible situation when ur mind gets blank, and or say something stupid XD
I also have this, but maybe you just try to laugh about it..
not the whole world have to like u!

 

[I_jailed_me]

im just back from the supermarket , i went in dere with nothing on my mind, was feeling ok and BAMMMM.... as soon i seen all the people my anxiety hit me. wheni was leaving the woman who served me said "have a good day" and all i did was look at her , wtf is dat all about i cud nt tink of anything to say :: is it gone so bad now that i cant even reply to a simple comment ????? she must of thought i was a right ignorant fecker !!!!!!!!

haha..Well what can i say other than welcome to the party pal!! I hide under my cap, i cant even face people!! People know i am freaking out under that stupid cap and dont even say thank you!

Your not alone there are many of us who seem to go through this "phase''!?

 

[Lost Girl]

Hey people,

Are you also very quiet?
And when you are going to a social situations, are you also afraid of ending up speechless and dunno what to say?
This is my worst scenario in my head, mostly it will end up all different, that I talked alot with a person, But i had some moments in my life .. damn so awkard .
Mostly i dont go to a social place because im afraid ill end up speechless.
This drives me crazyyyyy

Do you also have this fear?

And maybe somebody knows how to think different on this case??
Cause it's really a struggle

I think most of us here have this problem .
When a social event is coming up I work myself into a ridiculous and fretful state. The best way I can calm myself down and just prepare myself for what is coming is when I visualize the event, and if its with people that I know such as family or old friends that I may not have seen for a while, I just remind me of who they are, the easy conversations we've had in the past, and it relaxes me. Sometimes I need to straight up tell myself to stop being selfish and that I'm lucky that I have people who want to spend time with me, and remind myself to stop focusing on what I will say and do or how I will look, and think about the people in my company. Find out what's going on in their life and so on...

When it's a social event involving strangers however...a nice glass of wine will do the trick . Otherwise, just try to go with the flow and not over-think everything, or think that you have to make the first move. Let other people make the first move with getting the conversation rolling. As long as you make an effort, it should all work out well enough.

 

[Scooter]

I always divert the conversation to be about the other person. Most 'normal' people want to talk about themselves and will like you better for listening, it's much easier to listen to others talk than to have to talk myself and most people are happy to oblige

 

[Damaged]

No im not like that at all tbh. I'm really outgoing, i can be a bit shy at first with people but normally its really hard to shut me up.

 

[Qbmaster]

I think it is important not to worry about being quiet. If you worry that something is going to happen, you are likely to either over-compensate (talking too much and saying stupid things that you will later have time to obsess over) or make this a self-fulfilling prophecy (you'll just place yourself in the corner the first thing you do and avoid all conversation). Whenever you are in a social situation, try to just relax and see what happens. If you want to talk, talk. If you want to be quiet, be quiet. People will accept you even if you are quiet. Also, if you observe other people you will notice that even the most social people spend a lot of their time not talking. Nobody can talk all the time. That would be exhausting!

 

[jbeenthere]

sometimes instead of worrying about how self-conscious I get I trty and be conscious of the environment I'm in. like is the store really crowded, is it a nice day outside, what is the person in line in front of me saying to the checker. then maybe something will come to mind to say when it's my turn for the checkout inquisition.

 

[CC81]

At a wedding, I was the only one at the table who wasn't talking (just observing, listening)

This happened to me too at a wedding on the weekend. I was put on the table where no one knew anyone else (and I didn't know anyone at the wedding apart from the bride and groom). I managed to introduce myself and have some limited small talk but it was incredibly taxing. For the most part I just sat there smiling, hoping the night would end and feeling like a freak.

 

[michaellipz]

No im not like that at all tbh. I'm really outgoing, i can be a bit shy at first with people but normally its really hard to shut me up.

im kind of the same way. i will be freaking out in my head but im sooo anxious of embarrassing myself somehow that i overcompensate and spend huge amounts of energy on talking and acting completely "normal".

 

[jbeenthere]

im kind of the same way. i will be freaking out in my head but im sooo anxious of embarrassing myself somehow that i overcompensate and spend huge amounts of energy on talking and acting completely "normal".

that's totally me also. I've overcompensated so many times then felt embarrassed afterward for being obnoxious.

 

[Richey]

im kind of the same way. i will be freaking out in my head but im sooo anxious of embarrassing myself somehow that i overcompensate and spend huge amounts of energy on talking and acting completely "normal".

this means you are not shy but you are socially anxious i think..so you are talkative but anxiously talkative..

 

[xxaimsxx]

If im quiet and someone else is i'll just laugh.. If im in a group of people i dont like then yeah i'll keep quiet. It sucks.