easier being female

[no1]

why does it have to be 'aggression' while the women are 'passive'. Why the 'Aggression' at all? I mean, its 'aggression.'

The jerks dont' need to have a monopoly because they just force it down their throats.

It would be easier if the assertiveness quality could be accurately distinguished, and be the "strong silent" type rather than have that misperceived as a negative weakness. Do people base their 'assertiveness' on arrogance (aggression)?

I'm not saying you are necessarily being arrogant combat, but use the word assertive rather than aggression. I think people have the idea that aggression is preffered, or have blurred the lines at least on what is considered aggressive or not, under different circumstances. Boundaries which are set by one sex (i'm thinkin women here) perhaps abusively, even unknowingly against men they view as "horrible weakness" in any sense.

 

[DarkSeeker]

one thing im grateful for, is being female, because i think it would be alot harder to be a male with social anxiety. really just because submissive or shy behavior seems more tolerated in women. how do you guys think your gender relates to it?

SA is easier for females because being less assertive for women is something normal in our society you say?

The emotional pain is not any less for women than men, if not even greater on average due to the difference with the wiring of the brain and the fact that these women usually get hooked up into abusive relationships.

Pain is pain, and being alone, incapable of communicating and standing up for oneself is not a easy thing to digest for no one.

 

[combat]

no1, if you want to call it "assertive" that's fine. By aggressive I never meant being arrogant or an *******, so maybe assertive is the better term.

I sense though that you're trying to fight the system too much. That's a lost cause.

 

[mrb]

your probably right there , lots of blokes like a shy girl , but girls like a man with confidence ...

 

[LadyWench]

one thing im grateful for, is being female, because i think it would be alot harder to be a male with social anxiety. really just because submissive or shy behavior seems more tolerated in women. how do you guys think your gender relates to it?

You're probably right about that. I agree. Although, other reasons can make being female more difficult sometimes.

 

[DarkSeeker]

no1, if you want to call it "assertive" that's fine. By aggressive I never meant being arrogant or an *******, so maybe assertive is the better term.

It's nothing personal really, I'm just being tidy with words as usual. I thought that assertive was being aggressive without the negative side of it and found it a more appropriate word to describe our ordeal.

I sense though that you're trying to fight the system too much. That's a lost cause.

That's not a lost cause, it's a lifelong challenge. If nobody does nothing, then nothing will change! That's how those sycophantic bullies take over society. Why on earth would all the bad people have the right to do everything they want while good people like us stand by silent and passive?

As men and women, we all have the birthright to live and assert our right to be a unique individual with emotional needs that need to be met, may this be in accord with society stereotypes or not.

 

[Lorraine Manca]

there's a really extensive analysis of human mating rituals interwoven in this thread. you guys ought to put together a documentary for animal planet...

the female deceptively plucks the fellow's hair out, claiming that it got caught in her bracelet.. later we will see her secretly take it down to her lair for dna testing. meanwhile she chops down on his jugular, the so called "love bite", which is actually meant to test for thin skin. later she will ask him to move her furniture inorder to check for a backbone.

 

[mrb]

there's a really extensive analysis of human mating rituals interwoven in this thread. you guys ought to put together a documentary for animal planet...

the female deceptively plucks the fellow's hair out, claiming that it got caught in her bracelet.. later we will see her secretly take it down to her lair for dna testing. meanwhile she chops down on his jugular, the so called "love bite", which is actually meant to test for thin skin. later she will ask him to move her furniture inorder to check for a backbone.

i had to smile at that ::

 

[no1]

or you know the regular "she tests him or plays hard to get to see if the guy is brave enough to be an ahole with her during unnecessary times because it symbolizes strength and dominance "

 

[Juggalo]

This is definitely true. ALL the female friends I have tell me if I want to date I have to "just get over" my shyness and approach women, not to expect women to approach me because they don't do that. I point out to them its a sexist double standard that women can be shy and thats acceptable in the dating world but men can't. And they say oh well, it may be a double standard but thats how the game works, thats life you just have to accept it or accept being alone. : /

 

[no1]

It's not just that it's about women expecting you to initiate. It's also that women make it hard, and they know it. They make themselves unnapproachable, so that you have to bust your ass. There's no equality. usually anyways. And if not, they're definitely not going to give you any signs, or help you. You have to pry it out of them.

If women only care abut confidence, then it's just being primitive because they only care about displays of dominance. Just like the apes do.

Women don't have a limiting factor like men do. The limiting factor for males is if they'll even get to find a mate. The limiting factor for women is if they'll want to commit to a man.

The simple fact taht they can fulfill their sexual and/or romantic needs covers for a WHOLE LOT in terms of social anxiety, if not then everything since it's the one goal according to biological dogma: that a living organism is distinguished from the non living by the fact that it can reproduce and adapt. Soonce you have that covered you have pretty much everything covered so that you can finally express your true being to the fullest.

I also don't think that sex (and gender itself) is just for procreation.. but I do believe it should be shared with one person and one person only (at least at a time, but not looking to do more than one in our short lifetimes either). So yea...........

Blahhhh

 

[Juggalo]

It's not just that it's about women expecting you to initiate. It's also that women make it hard, and they know it. They make themselves unnapproachable, so that you have to bust your ass. There's no equality. usually anyways. And if not, they're definitely not going to give you any signs, or help you. You have to pry it out of them.

If women only care abut confidence, then it's just being primitive because they only care about displays of dominance. Just like the apes do.

Yup.

Ok...I'm going to catch a lot of flack for saying this but it needs to be said...

Its a good thing women aren't physically more dominant than men because in my opinion, women are by FAR the meaner gender.


"If women only care abut confidence, then it's just being primitive because they only care about displays of dominance. Just like the apes do."

We have not evolved as much as we like to think. Humans are still very ape-like, except we have guns, nukes and computers now(yay!). The whole mating thing has changed very little, they still want a cave man.

 

[klytus]

Good god, people, listen to what you are saying. Only very few women are like this.

The majority of the women want a guy who is confident. Period. That they go for displays of confidence, too, is only logical, as such cues are the only aspects upon which they can classify a man as confident or not. A guy who does not show any signs of confidence at all is most definitely not confident. However, a guy who does display confidence has a chance to actually be confident. So, naturally, women go for that, to later find out what he truly is like.

Sooner or later women do realize the deception, and split up. At least, the wise ones do. Those who don't you better stay away from anyway.

 

[Juggalo]

I just cannot for the life of me understand why women are so hung up on a guy being "confident". Confidence just seems like a modern stand-in for dominance and being the alpha male of the herd. I respect you klytus but I still think that the dating game is still very animalistic and primal. People are in general.

 

[klytus]

Well, yes, dating is "primordial", but sexuality in general is. Can you understand why women are so hung up on a guy being dominant and an alpha male? If you can, then it is obvious why women want men who are rightly confident.

 

[Juggalo]

Well, yes, dating is "primordial", but sexuality in general is. Can you understand why women are so hung up on a guy being dominant and an alpha male? If you can, then it is obvious why women want men who are rightly confident.

Well I can't understand it. I'm submissive.

 

[klytus]

Your being submissive has nothing to do with your inability to understand. :: Well, there are dominant women, but that's not the majority. It is easy to see why women usually want a man who can protect them - who can not only be a protector but also a companion, and who stands on his very own feet. It is equally easy to see why a woman doesn't want a man who is in need of her for anything. Dependency is seldom an attractive trait.

I want a girlfriend who is my equal, who shares my lifestyle and most of my dreams, such that we can work towards realizing them together. However, I want her to be able to do and want it on her own, too. For me, it's about going through life together, without interdependence.

 

[BlueDays]

Your being submissive has nothing to do with your inability to understand. :: Well, there are dominant women, but that's not the majority. It is easy to see why women usually want a man who can protect them - who can not only be a protector but also a companion, and who stands on his very own feet. It is equally easy to see why a woman doesn't want a man who is in need of her for anything. Dependency is seldom an attractive trait.

I want a girlfriend who is my equal, who shares my lifestyle and most of my dreams, such that we can work towards realizing them together. However, I want her to be able to do and want it on her own, too. For me, it's about going through life together, without interdependence.

Well said Klytus!!!! that is i agree with the unedited version!...er....not the bit you added on at the end, lol :0

 

[Juggalo]

Your being submissive has nothing to do with your inability to understand. :: Well, there are dominant women, but that's not the majority. It is easy to see why women usually want a man who can protect them - who can not only be a protector but also a companion, and who stands on his very own feet. It is equally easy to see why a woman doesn't want a man who is in need of her for anything. Dependency is seldom an attractive trait.

I want a girlfriend who is my equal, who shares my lifestyle and most of my dreams, such that we can work towards realizing them together. However, I want her to be able to do and want it on her own, too. For me, it's about going through life together, without interdependence.

So should I change my essential nature, and make myself be dominant, just to appeal to more women? Or find a woman who doesn't mind not having a dominant guy. I like dominant women.

I'm 5'7", chicks aren't going to feel like I can "protect" them. See, this isn't HUMAN. This is primal, ape BS. I am a human who has evolved to the point where I work from my mind, not evolutionary instincts.

 

[Juggalo]

Ladies, we live in 2010, not 5000 BC. You don't need a caveman to protect you from the lions or whatever anymore. Jesus.