Does anyone doubt that thier SP might be connected to lazyness

Does anyone doubt that thier SP might be connected to lazyness

  • Yes, thanks for the update!

    Votes: 5 13.2%
  • No, I have real SP

    Votes: 22 57.9%
  • Can't say!

    Votes: 2 5.3%
  • Troll?

    Votes: 9 23.7%

  • Total voters
    38

coyote

Well-known member
social anxiety and phobia is about fear

it's about avoiding social interaction due to fear

not out of laziness

not because of depression

not because you don't like people

but because you are afraid of what will happen when you do interact

it's right there in the name - pretty easy to figure out really

the problem is that many people feel ashamed of being afraid, so they look for excuses to cover up the fact that they're afraid

like "it's too much trouble" or "people suck" or any of the endless variations you can find if you throw a rock in any direction on this forum

fear is fear - the only way to overcome it is to face it, not hide from it
 

Hellhound

Super Moderator
must_not_feed_the_troll.jpg


It is hard sometimes :ironicsmile:

I just ran out of troll food.
 

aNOTfox

Well-known member
I've read the title outloud several times and still don't understand exactly what your asking, would you mind re-phrasing?
 

Hellhound

Super Moderator
I've read the title outloud several times and still don't understand exactly what your asking, would you mind re-phrasing?

From what I understood, he asks if we think SA has anything to do with being just lazy.

But I have a hard time believing he's serious.
 

OceanMist

Well-known member
If you are talking about friends and a g/f, then I don't think it has to do with laziness, it's just lack of desire due to shyness.

I have some lazy friends and they all have extremely active social lives and tons of friends and the date the opposite sex quite often. They do that because they have a desire to do it.
 

crazycatlady27

Well-known member
i know that some people think i am being lazy but until you have a panic attack out in the open with no where to run to and no one to help you, then they can think that lol
i wish it was just that as it would be a hell of a lot easier to cure !!!
 
I think there is a connection to lazyness, somewhere there deep down. But how much of a connection, that is the question.

The term "lazy" is quite a "fat" word, and so it's hard to find an exact, specific answer to the poll question. This page might help: laziness--an obstacle to living life fully ("many people suffer from diseases or illnesses, many undiagnosed, that may deprive them of energy and make it seem as if they're being lazy").

I tend to view SP (and SA also) as rather "intense" things .. you know, having "intense" fears & feelings .. and laziness is not about intensity, i don't think, but more LACK of intensity: lack of drive, motivation, interest,etc.

Personally, i've always had very low motivation to do things (in the real world, not in the mental/cerebral world, had tonnes for that). So i have been lazy in one respect, but certainly not lazy overall (as i "worked like a trojan" at my schoolwork, and still do so with all manner of things on the computer nowadays, due to being an obsessive type). But since i often don't feel like doing much else than use computer or watch tv, then i definately would appear to others as being a lazy person overall.
As to my SA/SP. That's been born out of fear (or terror), which is a result of years and years of being "attacked" by people, both strangers & those whom i know/trust. Along with being over-sensitive of course. So i put most of the SA/SP down to that.
Aspergers: Another thing i have in the mix. Has added to the SA/SP. I guess also has a degree of laziness, as it saps ones desire to even try to connect/socialize, as you just KNOW it won't pan-out, ever (due to having the permanent social disability such as Aspergers or Autism). You think 'why bother?'. And so there is often very little motivation at all to "get out there" into the world.
Depression & GAD: Whether it's low-level or intense, it generally just "saps the life-force" from you, resulting in, i guess some form of laziness - apathy, very low motivation, boredom, etc.
Anhedonia: Means you can't gain enjoment from things, people included of course. I've had that on-and-off over the years, but when i haven't had it, i still couldn't "gain" anything from being around people.

Overall, there's "connections" between almost all problems/disorders. But as i've shown above, i haven't found there to be a direct correlation between SP & "laziness" (lack of desire/motivation). That is, laziness does not seem to cause SP, in and of itself. It might possibly contribute though, perhaps making it worse, but it does not cause SP.
 

Hellhound

Super Moderator
Laziness = Not wanting to do things. Not feeling guilty about it. Not caring.

Definition of laziness:

"indolence: inactivity resulting from a dislike of work."

"Adjective
Unwilling to work or use energy: "he was too lazy to cook".
Characterized by lack of effort or activity."
 
Here's another take on laziness...
(from "The Kick Butt Club (Anti Procrastination and laziness)" thread)

"Laziness" is a myth designed to marginalize people with psychiatric disorders. Calling someone who is depressed, lazy is like calling an ethnic person a racial slur. They can no more help their emotional / motivational disposition than they can help their skin color. I think "lazy" is an adjective that should be avoided on a social anxiety forum... Just my opinion.

I think laziness is a mindset. A self-destructive pattern because of whatever reason (depression, some other disorder). I know the word lazy is being thrown around very easily by people and it's very hurtful (yes I've been called it as well), but I do believe that laziness is something one can recognize in themselves and that should be overcome.

When I say lazy I am talking about all those days/weeks/months that I pissed away because I didn't take responsibility for myself, procrastinating positive action and just waiting for things to happen instead of being proactive and taking chances and putting in effort. I know deep down that I could have done more and was basically hiding behind depression.
 

OceanMist

Well-known member
The thing that I think of when I read over this thread is that it seems an SP person's problem is more of fear and anxiety as opposed to laziness.

When I'm not injured, I have no problem busting my ass and running a 5k run. You can't tell me for one second that anyone who is willing to do that kind of run all out every other day is lazy.

But then if you put me in a bar and I have to make conversation with people, I will have trouble initiating conversations. Just getting to that bar is a giant leap for me because of the fear.

It's all about the anxiety. That's the stopping factor that makes us appear lazy. It kills our desire to socialize.
 
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What is laziness really? How long do you have to be (or appear to be) inactive in order to be labeled that way? The word has a bad reputation, but does it deserve it? I could be wrong, but I would bet that most people that others view as lazy are just misunderstood, and/or have an underlying physical or mental disorder to blame for their apparent "laziness," like anxiety, depression, anemia, or any number of things that sap one's physical and/or mental energy. To me, calling someone lazy is just a way of being dismissive, and being too lazy (lol) to really care about that person and investigate why they are that way.
 

KiaKaha

Banned
like "it's too much trouble" or "people suck" or any of the endless variations you can find if you throw a rock in any direction on this forum

That is unless of course some people actually DO suck.

I think there is a line that is blurred between masquerading fear and things being as they are - but then again it's all a matter of perception.

I think the OP was merely trying to ask whether laziness (in true terms of the definition - cant be bothered etc) was an element to the propagation of social anxiety.
 
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