Do you sometimes feel the need to prove yourself?

[gustavofring]

Like to people who always see you as a loner or loser, you want to show that you're not that way, by somehow showing you do have friends and an interesting life? Basically being pretentious?

I feel like being dragged into this a lot, more recently I have tried spiritual teaching that taught me to not resist the moment, and try to be as humble and ego-less as possible because it takes away suffering. But after a dinner last night with roommates which I forced myself to go to, everyone (big ego's) had a lot to say, talking about their busy lives, all their gossip, all their sociality, I was basically being quiet, and I felt again that uncomfortable pressure to "be someone". I felt a general lack of respect for me as well (no eye-contact, a bit of a condescending tone and stares).

I guess I can let it slide better now then before, but it does make me slide into that egoic "resistance" pattern a bit again. It really sucks the energy out of me to be around these people.

 

[Section_31]

I personally never feel this, i just shrug and stare blankly when someone tries to challenge me about it, especially my father in law.

It jsut doesnt phase me either way.

 

[JackOfSpades]

I have a hard time with this too. So many wise people and so many advices on how to be a genuinely good, and noble person seem to run counter to what is appreciated by people, to what is successful in life, and to what is attractive to the opposite sex. Everytime I try to be humble and selfless on a deep level, I feel I become a model of something good and comforting, but that ultimately is sparkles and doesn't entice on that intangible level where attraction and allure live. I embrace the humility but simultaneously reject it. And the reasons why I feel unable to surrender to it is one of my biggest resentments in life.

 

[laure15]

I feel very uncomfortable when having to "sell" myself, especially in resumes and job interviews. I do admit to "fudging" some facts here and there in order to prove that I have what it takes to do the job. I list qualifications such as "excellent communication skills" when in reality, I don't have such skills. The whole process is so pretentious.

With my friends, I also felt the need to prove myself and misled them on several issues. I felt bad afterwards because I was not being completely honest with my friends.