Do you ever feel rebellious....

[k8steroonis]

To not be happy?

I've just realized something. I feel so pressured to be happy in this world. Like sadness is not okay. I know the amount of sadness I've been having is not okay. It obviously means there is a problem. But I've always felt like if I'm not happy then, no one will like me, and therefore I felt pressure to be happy all the time. That ended up making me feel completely miserable.

I guess I just don't feel like I even know myself anymore. That all-the-time happy, trying to entertain everyone, people pleaser, wasn't me. But this horridly depressed person isn't me. But I've never been able to strike a medium.

So I guess the only explanation for why I continue to make myself sad is that it's sort of a rebellion against what everyone thinks I should be. But in the end I'm the only one losing here. I see this problem, I just am not quite sure how to fix it at all.

 

[this_portrait]

I feel like that sometimes, but not exactly regarding pressure to be happy. I tend to get rebellious when everyone tells me to 'think positive' all the time, especially when there is little to nothing positive going on in my life. Thinking that everything will be great is only a delusion, because in reality, things can always get worse instead of get better.

Being negative all the time isn't good, either, I know, but then I wish these people who place so much emphasis on positivity would take stop trying to shove their way of thinking into my mind and possibly let a little negativity into their own lives for once.

It all kinda reminds me of Christmas time, when everyone expects you to be happy just because it's the holiday season...

 

[laure15]

Yes I do feel rebellious especially when people try to impose their wills and wants on me. For example, people who try to get me to smile and talk when I don't feel like it, people who force me to play games i don't want to play, bullies who try to make me angry with their bullying, etc. One of the most common ways I become rebellious is to intentionally be mute and not talk to anyone, be antisocial, show that I don't give a sh*t, and pretend I'm strong. People try to get a reaction out of me but I just do the opposite of what they expect.

 

[Steelsoul]

I feel rebellious when people say bad thing about me and i can't do anything to pay back. It really push me off my limits that i want to rebel, to show them i'm not easy to forgive

 

[Arthur_Dent]

I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that - I don’t mind people being happy - but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down 3 things that made you happy today before you go to sleep”, and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position - it’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfillment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness”. Ask yourself “is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.

Hugh Mackay

 

[SilentBird]