Do you ever feel fake?

[Peebles]

Yes I remember how I used to ask people " how are you " how " have you been " or forced smiling because someone was with child had a baby or got married just because that was what all the other people where doing or my parents made me comment on something,,, and yes i was fake because i never cared even if someone would answers my question I would zone out and ask myself why am i even here....

 

[LaLaLa]

yeah... it always feels so unnatural when I'm trying to talk, and most of the time I don't even know what I'm talking about. I don't know how I should act anymore. It's like I have no personality.

 

[EscapeArtist]

I do feel as if i'm being fake, and as Sundaygirl said, unnatural, in social situations (even when speaking on here). I also feel fake when I earn a title I feel as if I don't deserve. For instance, in school I was always the "artist", but my art was only as "good" as it was becaue I would sit for 10 straight hours into the early morning sketching the same half-a-page sized piece, too afraid to stop where I was at, to make a mistake and to be imperfect for fear of judgement when I had to bring it to school. I only admired my artwork because it was solid enough to avoid negative judgement by my peers. So when I was called an "artist" or whatnot, I felt like the biggest liar. Goes for a lot of other things too.

 

[Psychedelicious]

Time Gardens

Not really. I don't think I'm good enough at pretending most of the time, and instead just come off as weird. I don't really try hard to enough to pretend I guess? I wish I 'literally' felt fake, wow I suck. I think I just don't talk enough to feel fake. If I do talk it's either something I can answer or super short.

 

[GhoulsNightOut]

I think I feel fake the most when I'm at my campus. I feel tortured by my own thoughts all the time, the kind that only another victim of socialphobia (like everyone here unfortunately) can completely understand. So I know that since these non-socialphobic undergrads here wouldn't be able to understand why I think the way I do and do the things I do, I try to blend in with how everyone behaves almost...like when someone from a club tries to talk to me and asks "How are you?" first thing and it came out automatic and so fake to me that it gets me mad sometimes, I try my best to say "good" in the most normal voice possible when I feel like sh!t inside all the time.

I can't hang out or even talk with the majority of these people because they're so trendy and I'm just not interested in what they're interested in, but I've been alone for such a long time I'm so desperate to be just at least neutral with them so I don't feel hated.

 

[dottie]

See, I'd rather be loved for someone I'm not than hated for who I am. That way, when it all goes t*ts up, I'm hated for someone I'm not. I know it's not healthy.. but still..

that is hillarious! i don't mean that in a derogatory way. there is a lot of truth in this for me, too, why i am overly polite.

 

[chained]

I come out very fake, my words are empty, my gestures are dead, and i see it and they sure as hell do too..

but what bugs me is that i dont know if it is fake or who i rly am :/:/:/
it scares the s*** outta me..

I was walking today and thought hey what would i tell this girl if this happened and i made a fake reply in my head, i imagined the situation, tried to find smthg, not so original, but normal, acceptable and couldnt find it..
it could';ve been the pressure i put on myself and the fear of failing, but still..

 

[Single Player Gamer]

I feel like I'm to self-aware sometimes and arrogant in some social situations. My narcissism(which I'm working on) makes conversation feel unnatural, leaving me feeling superficial. What's helped me so far is listening more, than speaking. I don't have to have an opinion on everything.

Other times I'm to shy to be fake, which is bull****. I don't want my nervous habits, occasional stutter, among other things be the true and natural me.