Didn't really want to make a thread for this

...but it's probably better than posting it in the random thoughts thread. I guess.

A supposed friend of mine said hello to me several weeks ago and we both agreed we should get together after finals (which have passed). I texted her and after more than a week went by without a reply I sent her a message on Facebook asking her how she was and mentioning the text. She never replied to that either (and she has been on there), so she is clearly avoiding me and was being phony when she said she wanted to hang out.

Should I remove her from there? I know it's "just Facebook" but I don't want to look insecure, but frankly it pissed me off to be treated that way, so why would I want her around? I feel that I should just get rid of her and never speak to her again, but I also don't want to overreact. What is best?
 
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There could be other reasons why she seems to be avoiding you (depressed; giant pimple; prison; no internet...) so maybe just leave it as is unless you have positive proof
 

AlienGeranium

Well-known member
There could be other reasons why she seems to be avoiding you (depressed; giant pimple; prison; no internet...) so maybe just leave it as is unless you have positive proof

Yeah, it's better to take the "rather be safe than sorry" approach I think. Even if she is avoiding you, if you delete her and you see her again she'd be able to say "oh, I was going to message you but then you deleted me!"
 

Sacrament

Well-known member
Don't assume she's doing it for a reason that has anything to do with you. Wait for her to say something, or send her a facebook message saying "well, you wanted to hang out, so I'm just letting you know I'm down for it. Feel free to message me whenever".
 

chibiXphantom

Well-known member
i wouldnt jump to conclusions like that. two messages that someone didnt respond to and you dont want to be friends with them anymore? my friend sometimes wont respond to texts, no matter what time of the day it is, but he's not trying to be rude or to treat me badly. sometimes people just dont respond to messages. for any number of reasons...

facebook can have errors, maybe she didnt see the notification. maybe she didnt see the text until late at night and forgot to text back the next day. might have service issues, internet problems and the other reasons mentioned above. and sometimes people just dont feel like hanging out with someone at the moment. maybe they felt they saw the message too late and felt too awkward to reply.

id say wait a few days and send a "hey, whats up?" text or something. just casual, not seeming too anxious to hang out or something.
 
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Well, we're more friendly acquaintances. Just to be clear, it's been several werks since the text and I think a week since the message (not entirely sure), and I've seen her post some things since then. I forgot to mention this but the really suspect part is she told me she had a small window of time after finals to get together before she had to leave for the summer to go home, and that time may have passed by now - not sure.

So maybe it's passed and she feels bad/awkward, or maybe it hasn't, or a million other possible reasons, yes. But I personally wouldn't let that much time go by before responding if I told someone I wanted to get together within the next few weeks. Definitely seems suspicious to me. I won't delete her and it's not like I'm sitting around waiting for her to reply, but ehhhh. There are other nice girls I know who have never done that.

Thanks for the replies everyone.
 

R3K

Well-known member
you can just "un-follow" her so you don't see any posts by her. then you can't comment or "like" any of her posts causing her to lose ego points :applause:
 

SCP-087-1

Well-known member
I've found people say stuff like "We should catch up and hang out some time" but they aren't genuine. It makes the you happy and friendlier even though they never did anything, like a false promise. The conversation goes well and they leave feeling like they're a people person even though all they did was lie.

It pisses me off but it's something that people just say and never follow up on. Well, nice people follow up on it.

Don't do anything. Unfollow her if you don't want to see her posts but don't delete her yet. Wait a while then delete her. Then you wont look petty. But by then you probably wont care anymore anyway. Just don't get your hopes up if you bump into her again and she says the same thing
 
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