I don’t know what’s wrong with me, why do I tire so easily? I’m going to make a doctor’s appointment soon, but I’m nervous they will just think I’m lazy or complaining about something that is entirely unimportant. At the end of every day I’m always in pain. My muscles are achy and my shoulders hurt, I don’t think that’s normal. My fingers hurt from writing for only a few minutes, as does playing any sort of videogame. I can hardly stand up in the same position for more than a few minutes without feeling like I am going to pass out, my vision getting staticy, I start to breathe heavily, my heart rate skyrockets and I feel sweaty and start trembling. I can describe it as a similar feeling to a panic attack, only without anything mentally building up to it or hyperventilating, just entirely physical. Yesterday I was just standing waiting for my class to start, and I got so tired and felt as if I was about to faint. I had to just sit down on the concrete, and I absolutely hate doing that when everyone else around is comfortably standing. I’m OK if I can move around, I’ll still get fatigued but not the feeling that I’m going to pass out. I can’t even walk up a flight of stairs without feeling tired. My joints are always hurting too and I’ve had times where they have dislocated (usually it’s the kneecaps), and it’s excruciatingly painful. It always pops back in right away but it still really really hurts. All this has happened to me for so long I am kind of used to it. Whenever I take any kind of pain med or muscle relaxant I notice how amazing it feels to actually NOT be in this general pain, just in a physical sense. I wish I could feel like that all the time. Obviously I can’t rely on those all the time. It’s not severely painful, but it still limits me enough to be a significant problem.
Sorry for making such a long post. I’m just kind of tired of this every single day, it makes everything that much harder, especially when it’s paired with the already torturous anxiety issues. After I come home from school I am so physically exhausted. I have no idea how I could get a job on top of that. I’m also worried because I have to get a job really soon, but I don’t know what I’m physically capable of. Most of those minimum wage jobs take a fair bit of effort, and lots of standing. I can’t sit down and take a break every 15 minutes. I’ll still try to do whatever I can get, but I don’t want to end up embarrassing myself if I can’t last for more than 2 days. I might sound a bit dramatic in describing everything, but I’m just trying to get the point across. Does anyone else have anything like this? Am I just being lazy and have incredibly low stamina? I don’t know if it’s anxiety related or something different entirely…
Sorry for making such a long post. I’m just kind of tired of this every single day, it makes everything that much harder, especially when it’s paired with the already torturous anxiety issues. After I come home from school I am so physically exhausted. I have no idea how I could get a job on top of that. I’m also worried because I have to get a job really soon, but I don’t know what I’m physically capable of. Most of those minimum wage jobs take a fair bit of effort, and lots of standing. I can’t sit down and take a break every 15 minutes. I’ll still try to do whatever I can get, but I don’t want to end up embarrassing myself if I can’t last for more than 2 days. I might sound a bit dramatic in describing everything, but I’m just trying to get the point across. Does anyone else have anything like this? Am I just being lazy and have incredibly low stamina? I don’t know if it’s anxiety related or something different entirely…