Constantly Being Socially Funneled into Encounters with Girls...

[R3K]

...who i don't know sh*t about.

i've made a quantum leap in the recent year, occupationally speaking, by moving out of my comfort zone (living with my sister and working at an easy job.) my best friend convinced me to move in with him and his girlfriend and work at the restaraunt he was the head chef at.

he knows about my anxiety issues, and seems to have taken this "friendly" therapist role of sorts. lately his schemes have been centered around trying to hook me up with someone; i've conquered the new job anxiety (narrowly enough.) surrounded by latinos in the kitchen, five days a week at this job (i'm a quarter mexican btw). they have a very relaxed courtship methodology there. basically everyone's hooked up with someone at work with no caution for possible drama or nothin. so the first few months i'm working there everyone is trying to hook me up with this girl, and it's all blatant, obvious, and annoying. and i don't know **** about her. and she actually has a boyfriend. but being the shameless jackals they are they keep up with this bombardment of lines like: ooo jason likes her, (or) jason and her -- every possible scenario where they can insert a little plug, like "hey someone ordered a hot dog with now bun." so they say "ooo she'd like you to stick your hotdog in her bun.

and so i guess she was somewhat interested (ihaveno****ingideawhycauseshehadaboyfriendatthetime) and i ended up having her over to my house one night after work. she got carpet-bomb-plastered off vodka, me a little drunk, then she puked on me and my bed. embarassed, weirded out, estranged -- it all happened, and it's been awkward at work since.

now i'm at my bestfriend's girlfriend's niece's quincinera the other night, and first thing that happens when i get there (i can't even drop off my card to the poor bday girl,) my buddy says hey she's here(a different girl now), she's been waiting for you all night. i'm like what? whotheEFFareyoutalkingabout? -- ya, you remember, from 6 months ago at so-and-so's birthday party. i barely remember **** about her.

so EVERYONE there is just drunkenly bombarding me with "why don't you go dance with her? go sit next to her, she wants to talk to you."

i'm like WHO THE F*CK IS THIS WOMAN? I TALKED TO HER FOR 12 SECONDS FIVE MONTHS AGO, SHE DOESN'T LOOK THE LEAST BIT INTERESTED!
and my buddy's like, why you hesitating, you blew it, she's leaving now...
i'm wtf?

my sister's done this same thing to me several times, throwing me into encounters with girls with all this pressure, everyone expecting me to bust out some super suave pickup lines and score homeruns and ****. but by the time i work through my social quarks and get any momentum the chicks have lost interest, or they get weirded out.

sorry if this is ranty, but i just had to blow this out there. the continued ineffectual relationship "help" from clueless friends and family members. funneling us into really bad hookups our social nervousness wont allow us to succeed at. then the pity afterward -- awww, it wasn't meant to be... is he impitent?... is he gay?... she really wanted him, what's wrong with your brother/friend?

:kickingmyself: :crying:

 

[jaim38]

I understand what you're going through. I also hate it when people try to hook me up with someone else against my will. I guess people today are so obsessed with romance and sex that they try to make everyone else the same too. I think romance comes at a time when you're ready to have a relationship. It shouldn't be forced down your throat by other people.

There is nothing wrong with you for not wanting to hook up with a random girl. Don't let those people get to you. If I were you, I would have reacted the same way too.

 

[mikebird]

Best thing that happened after graduation was my current girlfriend who found us a house to live in, out of her Mum's place. I spent time up north on a hands-on apprenticeship-like scheme for engineers, doing CAD, serious control system wiring, plumbing, woodwork and welding, where I smashed my knuckle, and recovered...

Her boss at the pub where she worked in town made a good housemate. Good times. About three more houses over the good years until getting to where I am now, by myself. Socially at my best

 

[R3K]

If that woman had a boyfriend why is she drunk with you at your house? What the hell are you doing? And she was near your bed?

thats what i said:kickingmyself::kickingmyself::kickingmyself:

how the hell did i get funneled into that situation? it's like all my friends and family are feeling sorry for me cause i'm perpetually single so they try to play molly-matchmaker and engineer these elaborate encounters with girls they think i'm compatable with. or they're just blatantly egging me into going for chicks i should be having nothing to do with (like the above mentioned.) how the sh*t are we single social phobics supposed to operate under these conditions. normally you'd think: ok he's got his foot in the door in the relationship world he just needs to polish up his game a little. how do i "polish up" after getting puked on? how do i continue trusting my clueless friends/family.

sh*t if i had the money i'd change my identity and move to some midwestern state small town and do all this sh*t myself....

:alone: