Class tour&lunch, I'm freaked!

[TreeBones]

At the school I go to now everything is very independent I only go for three hours and work on the computer, the kids there say hi and I do too but I never iniciate anything more then that. There is a field trip coming up soon, we're going to a college and then after we're supposed to go out to eat at a buffet. There are only about 5 people in the morning class I go to which makes it even worse! I feel more noticeable and everyone there is friends with each other, I'm just the weird girl that won't talk to them. I want to skip soooo badly but they will notice and probably know that I'm trying to avoid them. On the other hand I want to take a risk and I would give myself that advice but it's SOOOOOOOO hard! I don't know what to do I can barely look at these people or talk to them without my voice shaking, how can I go out to lunch with them? what if they don't want to talk to me? what if they do!? ahhh! :kickingmyself:

 

[DeadmanWalking]

You know, for people like us, most of the problems we have are caused by imagining worst-case scenarios. In reality though, things usually go okay and we can look back on our terrors and laugh. So, go on the field trip. At the very least, it'll be a good experience for you. If no one talks to you, then don't sweat it. I usually have a book at times like those, so bring something to occupy your time (if your school will allow it). If someone does want to talk to you, then talk if you want. In my cases, I let the person talking to me know upfront that it's hard for me to talk to people so that they don't feel offended or sad if the conversation dies out or something. Maybe that's something you could do as well. As for keeping a conversation going, either ask questions (about the topic or their opinion on the topic) or give your own opinion about it and go from there.

 

[Quietguy11]

This is exactly how I felt when I went out to sit and participate on a D&D session with a group of people I only met once, except for two people that I knew quite well. At first I was all like "I'm going to have a great night, and not care what people think." My attitude was in the right place, but I wasn't able to put it into action once the feelings of anxiety and social fear settled in. At times I would have to just pretend I was looking at stuff on my character sheet because I couldn't make proper eye contact with anyone without feeling like if we locked eyes then I would have to say something. It was very awkward by times. But try to think of this while you are out with these people. Time is going to go by, and you are still going to be alive by the end of it. It can't hurt you, despite your feelings.

 

[DanielLewis]

Go and do your best to socialize for your grade. In high school I had a field trip as well with my class that I was supposed to go to but I didn't go for the same reasons. I wasn't friends with anyone in the class and I didn't want to spend 2 hours looking like a loner weirdo not talking to anybody. I skipped and lost about 10% of my grade because I was that nervous about it. In the end, however, it's better to go so your grade won't suffer. You don't have to be unrealistic and think that you're going to be able to rid yourself of any anxiety on the trip as long as you prepare yourself mentally. Change doesn't come that quickly and easily, but if you want to have something to say then you could brainstorm conversation starters beforehand. Think of like 10 conversation starters that you could use on the trip then you won't have to think of anything on the spot.

 

[TreeBones]

thanks everyone, I'll try to go I think.