chickened out/having fun

[cowboyup]

Has anyone ever experienced a time where you were invited to 'just hang out' with a couple people that you know, you get excited to be going out and doing something, then when the time comes you chicken out and make excuses?

Personally, for me, I feel guilty if I have any fun. As strange as it sounds..I know when I was younger, when I was invited to (for example) spend the night a friend's house or go for a burger or to the mall, my parents would always make me feel guilty but after several decades, I still feel guilty.

I made it as far as the car, looked at the gas gauge, and it was on empty. And that was my excuse not to go. I have 30.00 to my name and didn't feel it was a 'necessity' to put gas in the car to go out... (especially when I have to taken nephew to/from preschool)

Anyone ever do something like this? If so, how do you get over it and JUST DO IT?

I feel so stupid for doing this....and I know the more I make excuses, the less people will tolerate it - and I don't blame them.

 

[fate12321]

Yeah I sometimes do that at times. My friends have plans made and I agree to go, but when the time comes, I tend to feel, idk, uncomfortable for some reason. I usually make up an excuse just to not go...
I think I'm use to staying at home all the time and not going out to much.

 

[Ree]

Yeah, but then they force me to go out ._. lol. I think if you've been bought up with being made to feel guilty about something, it kinda sticks. It can be undone, just takes time and using baby steps

 

[TreeBones]

I've done this more than I can count, it has kind of become a really nasty habit I'm trying to break. I'm curious to know why your parents would make you feel bad about having a good time?
You shouldn't feel guilty at all.

 

[Hellhound]

I've never been invited anywhere, so I don't know the feeling :sad:

 

[planemo]

Being invited out for something fun, for me has been rare. I hasn't happened for almost a decade now. Even when I had friends I'd rarely be asked out.

However I have been asked to join people in doing community things and I'm definitely the "I'll think about it" type. That's my way of saying "of course I would love to come, I would love to just do things with others without inhibition, but I know I can't", so I'm actually saying No way.

The funny thing is having fun made be feel guilty too. Growing up I couldn't help but feel like having a life outside of my house is a burden on my parents. It seemed that they always portrayed the outside world as dangerous and if I wanted a piece of it, I was doing something troublesome to them. Whether this was just my faulty mind at work or not I'm not sure, but it did feel that way.

 

[Mittzu]

i did it alot in the past, lose many friends by that ...

 

[Fighter86]

I am afraid of socializing, so mostly I say no. Couldn't cope with the stress and anxiety.

 

[Whoopdeedoo]

Yes ive done that! I sometimes think its just not worth the bother of getting ready for because it will just be more of the same old same old. I go out ,i get over excited (aka nervous )than awkward than bored. Often i end up in fights defending my overbearing nervous personality because when my nerves dont present as awkward i can get a bit obnoxious and loud and draw negative attention to myself.