Can't stop staring at people

[HardLife]

Our biggest problem is that we are too conscious about our surrounding. We FEAR too much therefore we become conscious. We need to be more subconscious by removing all thoughts and just go with the flow of thing. It is not our EYES it is our brain that is destroying our lives.

*Please just try this for a month and give me a reply about your result.

Three things that we need to remember is that


1. DON'T THINK
(When you cancel all brain activity, all the negative thinking will be eliminated. But, don't get swayed from Common Sense!)
2. RELAX
(I cannot stress this enough, you cannot achieve anything if your are not relax, don't let failure get to YOU!)
3. EXPOSING
(It is very important to expose yourself to social situation i.e. crowded park, mall, beach, etc... If possible do it often. 24/7 if you have to.)


Start of on your first day when you get out of bed remind yourself not to think! (When I mean don't think, don't think about anything! Not even what you will do that day, or what you will buy etc...) Doesn't matter if your at work or at school or even at a supermarket. Keep practicing not to think your brain will feel lighter and your eyes will be able to see things the way that they are intended to see. You will mess up alot in the beginning, but EVENTUALLY you will get better and better if you keep honing this skill. DON'T LET FAILURE GET TO YOU! FORGET IT!

Please NOTE* I am not resposible/liable for anything that you do. I am no psychatrist nor am I trained to treat this illness. I am only stating what I have experienced.

 

[Meggy0001]

I do the same thing.

 

[SoScared]

Our biggest problem is that we are too conscious about our surrounding. We FEAR too much therefore we become conscious. We need to be more subconscious by removing all thoughts and just go with the flow of thing. It is not our EYES it is our brain that is destroying our lives.

*Please just try this for a month and give me a reply about your result.

Three things that we need to remember is that


1. DON'T THINK
(When you cancel all brain activity, all the negative thinking will be eliminated. But, don't get swayed from Common Sense!)
2. RELAX
(I cannot stress this enough, you cannot achieve anything if your are not relax, don't let failure get to YOU!)
3. EXPOSING
(It is very important to expose yourself to social situation i.e. crowded park, mall, beach, etc... If possible do it often. 24/7 if you have to.)


Start of on your first day when you get out of bed remind yourself not to think! (When I mean don't think, don't think about anything! Not even what you will do that day, or what you will buy etc...) Doesn't matter if your at work or at school or even at a supermarket. Keep practicing not to think your brain will feel lighter and your eyes will be able to see things the way that they are intended to see. You will mess up alot in the beginning, but EVENTUALLY you will get better and better if you keep honing this skill. DON'T LET FAILURE GET TO YOU! FORGET IT!

Please NOTE* I am not resposible/liable for anything that you do. I am no psychatrist nor am I trained to treat this illness. I am only stating what I have experienced.

I'm on this. One week in.

 

[FallenAcorn]

I've read what other people have said about their problems, but mine seems slightly different. How did your problems start? I'm a highschooler and I've had this "staring" problem for almost a year and it's really ruining my social life. It started when out of no where when every classmate sitting on a desk to my right would think I was cheating off of them. I'm not the person to cheat and I'm usually smarter then a lot of my classmates. No one else on this thread seems to mention this... And also students sitting diagonally in front of me notice me too (and I don't even pay attention to them!!). So I don't know if it's my eyes or my head that's the problem.
Then this problem grew worse when I started to always pay attention to my surroundings using peripheral vision. It not just happens in a classroom now, it spreads outside of school.
And also Hardlife: I'm going to try!

 

[SoScared]

I've read what other people have said about their problems, but mine seems slightly different. How did your problems start? I'm a highschooler and I've had this "staring" problem for almost a year and it's really ruining my social life. It started when out of no where when every classmate sitting on a desk to my right would think I was cheating off of them. I'm not the person to cheat and I'm usually smarter then a lot of my classmates. No one else on this thread seems to mention this... And also students sitting diagonally in front of me notice me too (and I don't even pay attention to them!!). So I don't know if it's my eyes or my head that's the problem.
Then this problem grew worse when I started to always pay attention to my surroundings using peripheral vision. It not just happens in a classroom now, it spreads outside of school.
And also Hardlife: I'm going to try!

Hey FallenAcorn welcome to the forum. You can beat this. I’m halfway there. Seeing a CBT therapist could and probably would help you. I can’t recommend it enough. Books by themselves did not work for me.

I find your post really interesting. It seems as though you gave yourself the problem which has now gotten worse as you try to correct it. Me too. I’m fine with your classroom scenario these days but oncoming people can still give me problems.

You mention that you are not paying attention to your diagonally situated classmates..but maybe you are.

Just seeing people on the street makes me nervous, I tense up, people see that have tensed up and become wary of me so I tense up even more.

I’m working on trying to break a vicious cycle. Sometimes it is no problem at all so I know that I can overcome this.

You may find reading up on hyper-vigilance useful.

 

[FallenAcorn]

I've been dreading going to church every week because I hate it so much that I make my family feel uncomfortable sitting next to me and sometimes I just silently cry right at the spot... I don't want my family to always be like that around me, so I've been thinking about skipping church, but it's a sin in my religion to not go to church every week with the few exceptions of sickness or something. So should I do this? Would my problem be considered a sickness? I'm not very religious, but I've never skipped church before on purpose...

Hi SoScared, and thanks for replying. About the therapist, I rather not let my family know and money is a problem too.

You mention that you are not paying attention to your diagonally situated classmates..but maybe you are.

But how do people even see behind them? I can't even see anybody behind me except when I lean down to go through my stuff on the ground and the occasional head turn....
I don't have as much of a problem being in a public place because people are usually focused on other things, but I feel really uncomfortable when someone is sitting/standing next to me.
Also I'm glad to see you improve. It gives me hope I'll be able to overcome this

 

[FallenAcorn]

actually... I'm in doubt now. I don't know if I'm even on the same page as everyone else on this forum.
I don't know exactly what caused people to think I was staring at them in the first place.
(adding to my list of differences in this forum) Sometimes I'm able to relax and pay attention to main speaker/tv but some people still think I stare at them. And sometimes I don't even realize until later on. Can anyone else relate to this?

 

[SoScared]

Adrenaline. I’ve been reading up on the science of the hormone adrenaline and how we respond to stimulus. For me people.

 

[noway]

...Sometimes I'm able to relax and pay attention to main speaker/tv but some people still think I stare at them. And sometimes I don't even realize until later on...

Later on? How do you realize that you were paying attention/staring at people before?

 

[FallenAcorn]

Later on? How do you realize that you were paying attention/staring at people before?

They keep looking at me repeatedly. And on other situations, I hear them talking about me to their friends.

 

[noway]

They keep looking at me repeatedly. And on other situations, I hear them talking about me to their friends.

Of course everyone is looking at you (at me too). Do they say your name when talking about you?
It doesn't really matter if I'm focused on something or not. If I have sunglasses or not. My attention is spread all over the place and people around me have difficulties to focus on their own stuff. So they will look at me repeatedly too. Waiting for me to say or do something. I'm in the spotlight where ever I go. And I'm just trying to mind my own business I do nothing special to get all this attention. So it's more then just 'eye problem'.

 

[FallenAcorn]

Of course everyone is looking at you (at me too). Do they say your name when talking about you?
It doesn't really matter if I'm focused on something or not. If I have sunglasses or not. My attention is spread all over the place and people around me have difficulties to focus on their own stuff. So they will look at me repeatedly too. Waiting for me to say or do something. I'm in the spotlight where ever I go. And I'm just trying to mind my own business I do nothing special to get all this attention. So it's more then just 'eye problem'.

I don't quite understand what you are saying. I'm not talking about a casual glance at people around them, but they look directly at me. People don't just look at the same person multiple times without a good reason unless that person is capturing their attention. And no they don't say my name, but they look directly at me. And also I'm pretty invisible in my classes.

 

[HiddenGirl01]

Our biggest problem is that we are too conscious about our surrounding. We FEAR too much therefore we become conscious. We need to be more subconscious by removing all thoughts and just go with the flow of thing. It is not our EYES it is our brain that is destroying our lives.

*Please just try this for a month and give me a reply about your result.

Three things that we need to remember is that


1. DON'T THINK
(When you cancel all brain activity, all the negative thinking will be eliminated. But, don't get swayed from Common Sense!)
2. RELAX
(I cannot stress this enough, you cannot achieve anything if your are not relax, don't let failure get to YOU!)
3. EXPOSING
(It is very important to expose yourself to social situation i.e. crowded park, mall, beach, etc... If possible do it often. 24/7 if you have to.)


Start of on your first day when you get out of bed remind yourself not to think! (When I mean don't think, don't think about anything! Not even what you will do that day, or what you will buy etc...) Doesn't matter if your at work or at school or even at a supermarket. Keep practicing not to think your brain will feel lighter and your eyes will be able to see things the way that they are intended to see. You will mess up alot in the beginning, but EVENTUALLY you will get better and better if you keep honing this skill. DON'T LET FAILURE GET TO YOU! FORGET IT!

Please NOTE* I am not resposible/liable for anything that you do. I am no psychatrist nor am I trained to treat this illness. I am only stating what I have experienced.

Hey, how are things, now? Are things better and you seem it's the solution. Were you able to get back on track in your life?

 

[ohdude]

I think we have the same problem FallenAcorn, it´s ironic, I always wanted to be the center of attentions, especially girls', now I am, just not for good reasons...

Lets say that I enter in a public place, a coffee shop, there are two situations that can occur:
1 - I enter, relaxed, don't give a s*** about anyone (to avoid being creepy), and I´m just there comfortable waiting for my turn. At some point I notice a few people looking at me directly just as you describe, if I keep ignoring them they will exit (like running away from me), I guess I make them nervous...

2 - I enter relaxed, and at some point or i notice them looking at me and cant avoid, so I will do that awkward stare**... So either they will get nervous or angry at me. This creates a awkward atmosphere, they start talking with each other, I always get the impression that I'm being gossiped about.

**People usually call it crazy eyes

I've been exposing myself more as HardLife suggested, and thats the key but sometimes I just can't focus on the conversation, activity and happens what i described earlier on 2.
::

 

[FallenAcorn]

"ohdude", It's nice to know we have similar problems
sometimes I don't even understand anymore...
Just a question: but do people tell you, you have "crazy eyes" or in your perspective you just feel like you're doing it?

Also Hardlife: I don't think it's working, only because I already do the suggestions. I'm involved a lot in school. I can be relaxed in some social situations. I sit still and let people feel uncomfortable (that sounds a bit mean..) because I can't really do much about it. And I don't quite understand the "don't think" part because I mean there's always something in our minds we think about but I do find it helpful to go over hard things to remember like french words or going over my choreography for school to focus on in my mind. Kind like silently studying for a hard test in my head.

 

[ohdude]

Nobody has ever told me that, but I assumed so because people freak out when interacting with me... I can tell I am making people nervous... Also, sometimes I feel like I can't focus my eyes... It's got to be this...

 

[FallenAcorn]

Nobody has ever told me that, but I assumed so because people freak out when interacting with me... I can tell I am making people nervous... Also, sometimes I feel like I can't focus my eyes... It's got to be this...

About the "crazy eyes": I think it's just your mind lying to you, tricking your mind. You know how sometimes people feel like they're doing something big and emphasized (like how people try to dance) but really it's just small and not that noticeable.

 

[HardLife]

Hey, how are things, now? Are things better and you seem it's the solution. Were you able to get back on track in your life?

Nah still struggling. Problem with me is that I'm a very angry looking person combine with my staring it makes things way harder to achieve. But what I put up on my last post is what I've experience over the last 8 month... slight happiness.

when you have a friend or a mate in your life. the quality of your life drastically improves. they can really help you improve your quality of life.


FallenAcorn: Don't think is don't think. simple as that. you block your mind from thinking

---------------------------------

Has anyone tried ADHD meds for this type of illness before?

 

[jameslondon]

Hi i used to enjoy going out. but now everywhere i go i stare at people . if i go out anywhere will try and avoid sitting opposite anyone. cant even sit on a train as people opposite me. before i used to just do it sometimes. and worry that i might do it. now its automatic . its making me so unhappy as i just want to go back to how i was. Im on fluoxetine but it does not seem to help. i have had counselling and still no. i know its a common problem . just wanted to know if anyone has any suggestions? i was even thinking about hypnotherapy . just want to be normal. it always messes up relationships as i avoid doing stuff. help

 

[feelsconfusing]

I have this. I just came back from a vacation with family, aunt's family, and parents' friends. It was the worst. I cried the night there and couldn't sleep. I just can't obsess over where people are looking and checking to see if they are focused on me. Also I can't focus where I want to stare, my mind forces my peripheral vision to stare at faces. And then the awkwardness, you know? I'm starting college soon and I'm about to lose it. I thought to myself I would kill myself after I graduated high school during the first year when it started happening. But I'm here, it's gotten better after 5 years, but it's still mostly the same. I have no friends. Internet is mostly my source for socializing and it's definitely not helping my actual social skills. Right now, I feel so sh*tty and I'm going to go crazy. I really hope there's some type of solution for this because I really can't handle it anymore.