Can you become outgoing?

[lonely_world]

I had a therapist tell me at one time that it would basically be impossible for me to become outgoing. I said I could try but she said I would only look like a fool, she didn't use the term fool though.

 

[turtlett]

I believe you could do it. I even believe I could do it if I really really really tried.

 

[lyricalliaisons]

Oh wow. That's a horrible thing for a therapist to say. They're not supposed to tell people they "can't" do something that could help them.

For me, it's not even a possibility to try, though I wish it were. If you can try to become out-going, I think you should do it. It might make things at least a little better for you.

 

[Dave_McFadden]

If you fall in with the right people, you have a chance. Imagine people responding to everything you say. You tell a joke, and you're funny. They accept you. They reveal their insecurities, and it turns out that they're similar to your own. And the strange things you wonder about the world, it turns out that they wonder the same things. People seek you out, and you "belong". And, more importantly, you like them back. They're people who you want to be with. Then after you form a group with these people, other people start to act positively toward you. They sense that you're "popular". Or at least worthy of talking to and finding out more about. And then maybe you don't feel so weird about striking up conversations with them. They listen, and seem to care about what you have to say. Then you get the idea that you can "talk to people", and that maybe you're all right after all. And pretty soon, you feel secure enough that you can just walk to total strangers and start talking to them. And if they act weird or hostile, well, you're popular, so it's their loss. At least, that's how it went for me for a few months. Maybe those were special circumstances, but I was able to be outgoing for a short period of time. I don't know about permanently though.

 

[Agitprop]

I think that you can work to achieve it if you want to. Maybe your therapist thought you were an introvert and preferred to keep to yourself and such and that's why she said it?

 

[Klaus]

You definetly can become outgoing.
I just saw with my own eyes.

 

[lettypagb]

If you fall in with the right people, you have a chance. Imagine people responding to everything you say. You tell a joke, and you're funny. They accept you.

youre a genius

 

[LonelyLeaf]

What a nasty thing for a therapist to say! Aren't they supposed to give encouragement and help?

I read some similar story once about a guy who had depression and a bunch of other ailments and his therapist basically said there was nothing he could do and he should give up trying and just settle for unemployment...but he didn't believe it because a little voice inside his head kept telling him that this couldn't be the end...so he worked hard, got his education, became a university professor and regained his life..if you want it hard enough and you believe in it then you can do anything (almost!). Have patience it takes time..

 

[Richey]

Of course you can become outgoing as behaviour can be dictated by habit or a way of thinking and practice, it depends if you'd rather be ougoing or shy, some people prefer to speak when they feel like it, others like to talk all the time ...

if you want to be a talker and you situate yourself around outgoing people then over time you will develop a more outgoing persona too if you really want it, if you are intimidated by outgoing people then you may become more chatty around quiet people because you feel less intimidated socially

its like unless you've studied a degree in civil engineering or have attempted it then you'll struggle initially but you can always learn or try

 

[NothingElseMatters]

I had a therapist tell me at one time that it would basically be impossible for me to become outgoing. I said I could try but she said I would only look like a fool, she didn't use the term fool though.

thats y i don't go to therapists

 

[Sinar_Matahari]

I had a therapist tell me at one time that it would basically be impossible for me to become outgoing. I said I could try but she said I would only look like a fool, she didn't use the term fool though.

You therapist said what? I bet you could be outgoing if you were around the right people. You should still give it a try if you really want to though. If it's not for you then you're fine being more laid back and quiet. I'm an example of a person who can be shy and then very outgoing at other times. I just have to know the people I'm around or be buzzed.