allergic2kryptonit
Active member
Does anyone besides me feel you are behind where you should be, in terms of long-term relationships and careers. Not to mention maturity levels?? :roll:
Behind in life???
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Richey
Well-known member
all the time, yeah and its even more contrasting when i see my sister and friends develop, sure im happy for em, but when im in an idle state and not moving forward, its tough not to think about it, and compare.
best advice is to do all that you can to not be in that situation, which is always tricky, or train yourself to feel content with yourself so you can look forward to improving and progressing in terms of career, friends, hobbies in the future.
the only way to do it is to DO IT! ..if you catch yourself moping around for too long then act and keep busy
best advice is to do all that you can to not be in that situation, which is always tricky, or train yourself to feel content with yourself so you can look forward to improving and progressing in terms of career, friends, hobbies in the future.
the only way to do it is to DO IT! ..if you catch yourself moping around for too long then act and keep busy
ignisfatuus
Well-known member
Easier said than done.
Lonelyheart
Well-known member
I've never had a girlfriend so on a scale of 0 to 10, I would have to say my relationship maturity is 0. I'm trying to learn to be content with being a loner. I think the severity of my social anxiety and lack of relationship experience will prevent me from ever having a girlfriend. The only way I keep my sanity is by not thinking about what I don't have; instead, I try to be thankful for what little I do have.
SqueakyGibson
Active member
allergic2kryptonit said:
Oh hell yeah.
I'm a 27 year old man, but really I'm a 13 year old boy. I never developed my life beyond that. It's so stupid and unusual to be in this situation that I don't know if I can ever dig myself out.
In terms of relationships, I haven't even had my first kiss, and I'm not sure it's possible now to have an adult relationship with a woman, even if one ever found me sexually attractive. An adult woman would expect me to be an experienced adult too.
In terms of employment, I've never had proper full-time employment, and my CV is completely empty. I mean completely - I have my school results, my A-level results, my degree result, and then it's EMPTY. A 27 year old cannot have a CV this empty, an employer would disbelieve the very concept. Not that I'm even ready to start looking for work.
I live with my parents. Never moved out. Never spent more than a day away from home. The most shameful part: I still haven't learned life skills such as cooking or cleaning. My parents do it.
I never learned to drive, and I'm too scared to. Not that I could afford a car (plus tax, insurance, etc) anyway.
So yeah. Do I win the loser prize?
I hear you 
I'm in my mid-thirties. I work for $10/hr. No girlfriend - let alone, a wife and kids. I don't own a house or really have any assets at all. I've really missed the boat.
Many of the people I grew up with are now in professional careers (doctors, lawyers, accountants, executives) while I'm still living like a teenager.
Can I blame all this on SA? Yeah, pretty much.
I wrote a page on this a while back called the real price of social anxiety
I'm in my mid-thirties. I work for $10/hr. No girlfriend - let alone, a wife and kids. I don't own a house or really have any assets at all. I've really missed the boat.Many of the people I grew up with are now in professional careers (doctors, lawyers, accountants, executives) while I'm still living like a teenager.
Can I blame all this on SA? Yeah, pretty much.
I wrote a page on this a while back called the real price of social anxiety
Predacon
Well-known member
Sometimes my lack of work experience bugs me, as its hard to explain when other people my age have a lot more on thier CV. I'm not that bothered about the lack of a girlfriend, I barely have enough money to support myself, a girlfriend would just be a serious drain on my resources when I prefer to spend what money I have left over on me.
cutefluffykitten said:
That's so cool though, that's how I always want to be able to live my life as well - still doing all the basic things that I've always loved. It must get harder to be able to get away with it the older you get, but hey I'll be over the moon if I can be this carefree at 34. Great post CFK.
As for the main question, I do feel behind in some ways, but not all. I've had friendships, relationships, I've lived on my own, been to university... but I haven't had a job yet at 22. I don't need one because I'm pretty much self-employed, but people still find it weird when I tell them that. What I don't mention is that I was forced to because I knew I could never make it in the job world with my anxiety. The one area of life I do feel advanced in is psychologically - being on your own a lot really gives you time to think about life and the way the world works, so I do feel "deeper" than most people my age.
allergic2kryptonit
Active member
GOOD, THEN IT'S NOT JUST ME :wink:
Kinetik, you are fortunate to be in the situation you are. When I was your age I didn't know what was wrong with me, or that there was help for it. I just wasted more time suffering along. You have a name for your problem and so you can face it and not waste as much time as some of us.... 8)
Kinetik, you are fortunate to be in the situation you are. When I was your age I didn't know what was wrong with me, or that there was help for it. I just wasted more time suffering along. You have a name for your problem and so you can face it and not waste as much time as some of us.... 8)