Are loners selfish?

planetweirdo

Well-known member
Made me think of this:
The Four Faces of Introversion
1. Shy-secure people: Don’t have a strong need to be around people, and don’t tend to worry about talking to new people. They can soc.i.a.l.i.se if they need to, but they general prefer to be by themselves and to do things on their own.

2. Shy-withdrawn people: Suffer from social anxiety. They are highly sensitive to perceived rejection, are anxious of negative evaluation, and are afraid of doing something embarrassing. They suffer more anxiety than people who are shy-withdrawn.

3. Shy-dependent people: Are overly helpful, accommodating, self-effacing and compliant. They have a strong need to be with other people but they feel they are inferior or “not good enough”. They have good social skills and are pleasant company – but they give up their true self in their desire to fit in.

4. Shy-conflicted people: Vacillate between wanting to be around other people and then pulling back (as social situations are a real source of stress). This group of people experience the most stress and anxiety.

I think that I'm number 4

plenty of extroverted people are selfish as they demand your time and attention and they always for some reason believe everything they say is interesting and worth talking about..

That's very True.
 

Metal_isthe_Answer

Well-known member
Does being a loner, or liking to spend most of your time alone, mean that your selfish?
lets say for the sake of argument that I was interested in someone.
I think about how I dont like to socialize and dont have a big interest in doing stuff publicly. In this scenario I would say that it is not fair to the person Im interested in if she has a lot of hobbies and is very social, it could end up being unenjoyable for her.
I dont think loners are specifically selfish, we just dont want to leave the confines of our comfortable bubble. Its a "Ill do my thing, you do yours, and were both happy"
 

Luckylife

Well-known member
If you spends your time and money on only you then that certainly fulfills at least part of the term 'Selfish'. I spend all of my home time alone and honestly I enjoy it. I go out to bars and clubs a lot but rarely to meet people, however there are often people there that I know and it works well. I haven't been to a private party for oh... years, if I did I would be very uncomfortable with "Adult fun". This is childish of me but that is essentially what I am and I think it is based upon a fear of sexual arousal in public. In private, well OK - the tales I could tell you.
 
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