About to do something I am incredibly scared of.

jellzzz

jellzzz

Well-known member
Hello people, im gonna do something I am really scared of, and I just feel like sharing it. Maybe that will make it a bit easier.

I really love writing stories. Its not just my hobby, its the most important thing in my life. Its my dream to be a real writer.
But there are a few problems. The first one is: I don't have a lot of confidence and I am a perfectionist. I just die inside if I find just one little mistake. And I have the feeling that a lot of the things I write are horrible.
But the thing is, I want to let my boyfriend read something I wrote today. That is something I want for more than a year, but I am just to scared. Even the thought of him disliking it makes me sick. I can't handle criticism, but I would love to finally share my passion with him.

But the fear is just so big. Its more intense that when I have to talk to random strangers, or do a presentation, or whatever. And that are things that make me scared to death already.

Does anybody know a way to fight this fear and finally just do this?

Please wish me luck!
 
Last edited:
jellzzz

jellzzz

Well-known member
Sorry, didn't wanna say anything more, don't know how to erase this
 
Last edited:
E

Epistemic

Member
Well, the first thing you have to understand is that criticism is part of the constructive process of writing. Writing is about expressing and communicating your general thesis or idea to a broad audience, and the only way to refine yourself in that process is to take criticism, so that your work can be subject to revision (and thus improvement). Otherwise, writing is just a waste of time if you want to become a serious writer.

The best thing to understand is that everyone has been criticized, is criticized, and will criticized until the day they die. Criticism is a natural part of life, and the only way to get over it is to simply accept it, and realize that some criticism is useful, and some criticism is worse than useless. You have to distinguish between the criticism that is constructive from the criticism that is non-constructive, and learn to revise and/or improve subsequent productions based upon those that fall into the former category.

People will always criticize, but often, people's criticisms aren't worth a damn. Feel free to take criticism on the cheek, but don't be afraid to brush it off when other's criticisms become unfair or unreasonable.
 
jellzzz

jellzzz

Well-known member
In my head, I know thats true. Only my feelings don't seem to get it. When someone criticizes me, they probably mean: "that part of it is not that good, but it will be a lot beter when you change that and that. The rest of it is fine."
But what I hear is this: "that part is not that good, so everything is horrible and you should stop writting."

But deep inside, I know that isn't correct, and I hope that that part of me will one day be stronger than the fear.
 
Luna1740

Luna1740

Well-known member
It is just one of those things that you have to "do". As far as my experience goes you just have to push through the fear, and when you come out on the other side it really will make you feel better.
 
E

Earthcircle

Well-known member
Martha Graham's letter to Agnes de Mille:

There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. ... No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a ***** divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.

(A perfectly harmless word was burned out. Sigh.)
 
jellzzz

jellzzz

Well-known member
Hey people, thanks for al your support!

And...I just did it :D
It was very scary at the beginning, maybe even the most scary thing I ever did, but eventuely, it was great. After doing this, I feel like I can do a lot more and battle anxiety a bit more. A great feeling I haven't felt for a while. ^^
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top