Office Politics

I've been working as a full-time Secretary for three years now. We have three offices. I work in the smaller office with my supervisor. The other office has my boss, and 50 more employees. I am obviously more comfortable at the smaller office. When it comes time for staff meetings, going to the other office makes me uncomfortable. Everyone over there is much older than me (I am only 25), and I don't feel like I fit in. I only talk to my supervisor, a receptionist, administrative assistant, and maintenance guy. The other employees have their own cliques, and I just don't bother trying.

One of my coworkers was leaving, so the other office was throwing her a going away lunch. I got the email about it, and cringed. I hate mandatory lunches or parties. I was anxious about it all week. When the day came, I made a quick appearance, talked to my co worker, made an excuses and left.

The following week, my boss ran into my supervisor and asked why I didn't stay and eat at the luncheon. My supervisor asked me, and I made up a BS excuse about not feeling well. I was just too anxious to stay in a small little room, with all my coworkers already talking in their cliques. They are all nice people, but I just don't feel like I fit in.

I just got a raise and I am worried that my antisocial tendencies will effect my job. I can't change the way I am.

Jobs often require us to do social things we don't want to do.

I think you should still make appearances, even if they are short, and understand that you can go back to your smaller office once it's all over.

You got a raise so you must be doing something right, so keep on it!

I can relate to that, I hate office politics as you call it. The "strategy" I chose when I started at my current job, which is the one that has worked the best so far, was to participate to these lunches and parties in the beginning and try to be in a good mood (smiling and laughing at the jokes) but not trying to be someone else (so basically most of the time I don't really say anything). This way, people start to understand that you are full of willingness, but also that you are not in your element in these kind of gathering (and that you're awkward), so after a while they don't mind if you're not going

OMG Office work is just the same every where isn't it?! Lol. You'd be surprised how many colleagues have an "Oh God, let's get this over and done with" attitude also.

I suspect most people at these things are looking forward to the end. Let's face it, all they talk about is work anyway. *sigh*

Don't worry about antisocial tendencies effecting your job. You're obviously good at it so that's all that matters.

Thanks for all your supportive comments. It make me feel better knowing that I'm not the only one feeling this way.

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Keep forcing yourself to attend those gatherings.
A few years back I was extremely socially anxious. Barely talked at work, been going there for a year. The last month I worked there I decided to try talking more and I improved a bit. I let my anxiety takeover me though and left the job. This meant my progress was stagnant.

University came and I forced myself to talk to people.
Long story short, keep forcing yourself to take action and progress will happen. No matter how little or slow, progress is progress

I hate mandatory social functions also. As far as worrying about being antisocial, don't beat yourself up about it. Just remain respectful toward the others and professional. I know some people at my office who don't do the whole social thing but are very nice and people seem to like them for that.