Being laughed At!!!

Timz

Member
if you were to ask me what is worst most humiliating thing that can happen to me--no it isn't having a blucket of manure dropped 9on my head--that'd be a holiday, it is being laughed at.
The whole reason I sought out a forum like this, and quickly joined was to get this off my chest. it is what happened yesterday

It was first sunny day, and even though I am partly recluse and agorophobic etc I do make effort to go out, and yesterday's my shopping. So I put on clothes that made me feel confident (though i Am VERY self conscious of body image) and i went to shop and all seemed cool, and then I went to gas station. it is a pay at pump--i HATE going into the place with the cashiers as I feel odd vibes.
But i couldn't get a receipt from the outside paything, so HAD to go in. As I walked to door it was busy and I could see the two cashiers, a woman and a man looking at me coming and they were laughing. As I walked in it was a really bad vibe, he was half hiding his face and she was trying not to laugh. I had to ask him to make me out a recept but =it took him time to get composure to even deal with me. basically I was being laughed at--disrespected. They must have thought I was a joke-object because they had no regard for how upset and humiliated I felt

So when this happens I go to pieces inside. I tried to keep calm, and asked for a recipt, he asked how much. I had forgotten and to go out I would have had to come back in and I was feeling broken inside, so I just guessed how much. As this hell moment went on other people started com8ing in and I was getting more and more angry, and it was showing. Eventually I snatched his writted receipt outta his hand and stormed out. When I looked back they both were luaghing.

I was MORTIFIED. I stood by my car not knowing what to do. I even got in for a moment, and said to myself 'what shall i DO?'--i could see they were still laughing. So I stormed in. By this time there was another women with them. I asked to see the manager and the lad smugly said she was on holiday, so i said to the other woman, 'well who is HER boss?' when i said that the smirks on those twos faces dropped because they knew i meant business. So I got the top guys number and as I went out i said ;your not laughing now are you?'

When I got home I made a complaint against them and its going to be dealth with.

Good. But these things destroy me. I cannot work and am classed as 'mentally ill'---I have had session with a persona centred counsello in the past, but when you say you havebeen laughed at etc they try and make out your imagining it because of low self esteem. In otherwords they try and undermine your very savvy about what is going on.

I had felt confident but their disrespect was REAL! but it leaves me feeling so wrecked. I have to keep thimnking about it---it feels like all your energy goes, and you just wanna sleep. You also have the most MURDEROUS feelings about these people who treat you like that. Strangers who are SO personal. being laughed at is incredibly personal. I dont know if anyone's experienced it? But it feels like when its happening you are an utter alien. it is very hard to describe the agony you feel. And I shake inside--both fear and rage. it is also embrarrassing to have to say 'are you laughing at me' even more so when thers people there. So it is l8ike this VERy nasty intrusive 'secret' between you and the ones doing it. It FEELS like RAPE!!!

it makes you in suspense when the next times gonna be. it happens periodically to me and always takes me by surprise

But *I want these chasiers to know that I will NOT be disrespected by them. if they were kids on a corner i could cross over the road, but i HAD to interact with these people for a transaction and there was no avoiding that. So they better behave themselves. I hope I am not just doing it for myself but for any others they may have been takin the piss out of.
 

coyote

Well-known member
Sorry to hear your story - it made ME angry just reading it. You aren't alone having been in situations like that. I have, too - and I'm sure a great many others on this forum. I know that doesn't make it any better, but at least, for me, it's comforting to know that maybe the WHOLE world isn't against you.
 

mrb

Well-known member
take no notice of those clowns mate , they sound like a right pair of twits , buy hey you shut them up didnt you , nice 1 mate ......
 

Ignace

Well-known member
Great that you did that ! I hope they got fired. It's a sad situation, but it gives you something to think about: the next time you're in a situation like this, you should do the same but angrier. It may sound drastic, but a punch in the face always works. xD 100% Guarantee there will be no laughing !
 

mrb

Well-known member
Great that you did that ! I hope they got fired. It's a sad situation, but it gives you something to think about: the next time you're in a situation like this, you should do the same but angrier. It may sound drastic, but a punch in the face always works. xD 100% Guarantee there will be no laughing !

yea great if you want to get arrested for gbh mate :rolleyes:
 

Timz

Member
Sorry to hear your story - it made ME angry just reading it. You aren't alone having been in situations like that. I have, too - and I'm sure a great many others on this forum. I know that doesn't make it any better, but at least, for me, it's comforting to know that maybe the WHOLE world isn't against you.

Hi Coyote. Pretty cool that first person to reply is called Coyote :)

Yes, this is BIG reason I felt need to come here and share this because this does may you feel SO alienated.
Even after the event and etc etc there is still the shame attached to this. I will have to use this petrol station again. I dont know what to expect, etc etc

You just wish you'd never gone, or it had never happened--if if if

My world is small really precisely because of past experience when i DID work and go out more. I used to get a lot more disrespect in various situations. Eventually it began effecting my health and I had to 'become a mentally ill person' to justy to the system i cannot cope with basically bullying, and the mindgames that go with it---ie., if you complain it is YOU that is 'paranoid' and so on---got emselves covered the 'norms' have

But what bugs me is that DESPITE making my world smaller this can still happen.
When I went to see the PCC (counsellor) I wanted STRATEGIES for coping with such as my worst nightmare--being laughed at, and all she could say was that is was me causing it--my low self esteem, or to understand that it is ony very sad people do it. But the thing is that what happens is the thought that everyone really feels like they do, and also the SUSPENSE of --is it gonna happen now? And being caught off guard--as I was last time though i could see it comin. All this makes me want to avoid people. if they dont laugh they stare, or give dirty looks
 

dooby-duck

Well-known member
Be proud of yourself. You wiped the smiles off their faces and now they have to face the consequences of being stupid at work. Sticking up for yourself can be hard.
 

coyote

Well-known member
Be proud of yourself. You wiped the smiles off their faces and now they have to face the consequences of being stupid at work. Sticking up for yourself can be hard.

Yeah, and the more you stick up for yourself - the more your reinforce the idea of respect for yourself, which will lead to a more positive self-image.

Keep up the good work Timz!
 
Last edited:
U

userremoved

Guest
take no notice of those clowns mate , they sound like a right pair of twits , buy hey you shut them up didnt you , nice 1 mate ......

Yeah some people will laugh at you know matter what you do, so don't let them get you to thinking that everyone will do the same to you. I got teased a lot myself so I just learned to start ignoring certain kinds of people. If you get upset that just seems to make them want to tease you more.

But it is true that a low self esteem will make you anticipate and fear this kind of reaction to the point where it seems like you're a joke to everyone you meet. Not that I'm saying this was the case at the gas station.
 
Really, if you're working the register at a gas station, you're not in a position to be laughing at anyone. lol. Not trying to suggest there aren't decent, intelligent people that work low-wage jobs, but clearly these two don't fit that mold.


On the contrary... This is what I've seen when I'm working or even off work. Some people take active strategies (on purpose or otherwise) to degrade others around them... "Hey? If I can't be at the top, I'll make sure that everyone else suffers. There might even be a chance that the currently successful will get so down that I might somehow get promoted."

That kind of thinking. I've worked with some security guards that are so smug and try to show how great they are as well as laugh at the supposed 'incompetence' of superiors and colleagues. It's just too common. People trying to humiliate me on purpose on the first day of work is common... but I note that they do it to everyone, not just me... The usual office politics and 'initiation'.

Not everyone or even the majority is like that. Just enough that makes life, working or otherwise, much less enjoyable than it could have been. And sometimes make life downright miserable.
 

Eam

Well-known member
It's horrible when you just get laughed at like this, it leaves your mind to try and fill in the reasons why. And when your self esteem is kaput, you start thinking all sorts of things as to what they were laughing about.

Sorry to hear your experience, I think you handled it very well. You may have stopped them from making some other vulnerable person feeling the same from their immaturity.

Just to let you know like coyote, I've experienced similar things - you're not alone.
 

Ren Koutaisou

Well-known member
When people laugh at me, it's ok as long as it's friendly and I'm able to laugh back.

When people I don't know laugh at me, it makes me want to hurt them. I'm already bitter, paranoid, and having rather erractic ways of thinking. I'm a waiter and this rarely happens, but I ask if they want a refill or something then all of a sudden I'm standing there, and everyone is stifling a smile, so I walk away, hear a bunch of laughing and giggling, turn around, and see someone laughing, I'm like **** that, not going to that table too much more. **** the tip.

But then I realized that playing Resident Evil helps take my mind off of crappy days at work.
 

Eam

Well-known member
I wonder why they were laughing...

Don't open up that can of worms!

They were just being jerks. And probably doing it to purposefully degrade like Dronee talked about in his post, to make them feel superior.
 

Luke1993

Well-known member
But I mean.....maybe they weren't laughing at the OP...maybe they were like laughing at something else? I dunno...
 

Timz

Member
u are so brave. I could never do like u

THANKS man. Yes it did take guts but i got So angry. it is like your going to have a heart attack and yet could tear them apart. It is SO personal. Like I said it is like rape. in that they are being So personal with your being, your feelings.

I HAVE of course somehow not kicked off in the past. Dig this---years ago my mum had a heart attack and I was in PIECES. I already had been through hell at these series of jobs where my self esteen had got so low I had let myself go--my clothes. When my mum had a heart attack (thankfully she recovered :)) I HAD to quickly somehow shape up--my appearance, one or two hang ups. it was a real shock. Anyway--I went into the florists to get flowers for mum and a girl behind the counter serviing me burst out luaghing at me!! And I had to somehow keep calm and get the flowers, but i was utterly humiliated---and that is not the first time of that type of getting laughed at in such a situation. I have always rgretted not saying anything but this time I have

What stops you usually is the SHAME. It is not 'cool' to ask why someone is laughing at you, because it is really ODD to begin with. the situation is ODD--weird, and so I feel totally at a loss. It is like I feel devoid of knwing what to do and totally helpess, and dreadfully upset. It is worst feeling in the world, and it drags on after cause you go over and over with it in your head, and i resent that. I dont WANT to have to think of the morons---but you do bedcause it effects me deeply

They were laughing at my body. How I look, and theres nothing i can DO about that so you just go very down feeling helpess. I am feeling a bit better now cause i am gettin it out like this. It is great heere;) really pleased to meet you and everyone :)
 
Last edited:

Timz

Member
some days i feel SO vulnerable--you know I go out for a walk, excercise---but when I am kind of walking around where theres houses and people and cars I can feel like UTTERLY vulnerable, but as soon as i get into a local park with trees, birds, nature i feel AMAZING and free.
It is ****ty people that makes ya feel ****ty
 
some days i feel SO vulnerable--you know I go out for a walk, excercise---but when I am kind of walking around where theres houses and people and cars I can feel like UTTERLY vulnerable, but as soon as i get into a local park with trees, birds, nature i feel AMAZING and free.
It is ****ty people that makes ya feel ****ty

You're right, nothing is better than nature. It makes you forget of all your problems.
 

Timz

Member
but i still avoid people in the park if i can

I want to add that in your MIND you imagine how you will act when the event i described happens. You imagine you'll be cool, and say witty things and keep your dignity type of thing--but in REALITY I break up inside and feel totally exposed, and my heart beats fast

you just feel naked in front of sneering faces

when i was with people a lot in work spaces i would blush a lot which made me even more self-conscious because it was exposing shame i felt

I am glad i started this thread because i hop if anyone Googles 'getting laughed at' they will know they aint on their own even if there is ONLY one other person. A big part of my problem is that sometimes feeling that only you suffer this particular problem
 
Top